La Boheme
by streakie257
Summary: Same flaws, different century, a modern prejudice. More complete summery inside. Language warning. Complete. I think.
1. The Maryton Zone

Chapter One: The Maryton Zone

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_Disclaimer: I know I act old for my age but not this old. Very little of this is mine. _

_Summery: He didn't know famous people lived in Iowa. She didn't know that jerks could be useful or handsome. Not strictly cannon. Some factual issues my be there as well. Same Flaws, Different Century, a Modern Prejudice._

_There may be some things that are incorrect about this story, like dates, I can barely remember what day today is. Locations are going to be wrong because I've never really been out east. Spelling is my mortal enemy and I apologize, but on some of it it's for the character like that person can't spell, so please take it in stride. Thanks!_

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**From: fitzwilldarcy. kingbing. believe this! What were you smoking!**

**From: kingbing. fitzwilldarcy. Re?**

**Aren't you about to take off? Turn off the email.**

**From: fitzwilldarcy. kingbing. Re?**

**If you want this off, why'd you reply? I've used my blackberry tons of times on flights, none went down. Now about my question. WHY?**

**From: kingbing. fitzwilldarcy. Re?**

**I bought a farmhouse in Iowa, near Maryton. I want to be away from all the city crap. Its awesome here, very peaceful and calm.**

**From: fitzwilldarcy. kingbing. Re?**

**Maryton? WTF?**

**From: kingbing. fitzwilldarcy. Re?**

**What do you want a sermon?**

**From: fitzwilldarcy. kingbing. Re?**

**I have time.**

**From: kingbing. fitzwilldarcy. Re?**

**I told you before. Besides the easiness of life, I've also met someone.**

**From: fitzwilldarcy. kingbing. Re?**

**Just one? Doesn't Iowa mean friendship?**

**From: kingbing. fitzwilldarcy. Re?**

**You're imposable. Shut your blackberry off. See you in a few.**

**--------------------------------------------------------**

With an angry stab the man in 2B, Fitzwilliam Darcy, turned off his email. He then with the same savage flair turned on his personal journal.

**--------------------------------------------------------**

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**Least favorite things and why my life sucks:**

**1. Caroline Bingley, Queen of Bitchtown**

**2. Io – fucking – wa**

**3. My 'vacation' involves both one and two**

**4. Catherine called; she still thinks I actually want to marry Anne. She's my cousin, nobody marries their cousin. The woman is delusional. And even if Anne wasn't related she's worse than a Stepford wife. I've honestly seen more personality in tightly curled steaming piles on the lawn.**

**5. Georgiana is leaving me. My baby sister is going to Julliard. I don't want her to go I need to protect her. She's all I got. But I'm a shitty parental unit, look at Wickham**

**6. Thought about Wickham, bad Darcy.**

**Charles Roderick Bingley III is on crack. Who in their right mind vacations in potato county? The pigs out number the humans 5:1. Sigh Charles isn't out of his mind, he just lives in his own little world, but its okay, they know him there.**

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Fitzwilliam let a breath out with a hiss and slouched in his chair trying to stretch out his six foot six inch frame. True he was in first class but the extra five or whatever inches was only a luxury for the short. As he sat sprawled out he though some more, a bad habit of his. As a child and as a man he lived in his head. He could be considered introverted and shy. But people were seldom in use of those labels. When he was little his peers thought he was weird. His parents found him serious. And his teachers called to him as intense. Even now those who did not know him well found him to be proud, arrogant, and aloof; unless they wanted his money. The root of the negative names. He was old money and successful, combine that with shy and people always got pride. He had now just given up trying, he was what he was, take him or leave him.

Darcy thought about all the reasons why he was flying to Greenacres. Reason one: Charles Bingley. He was his best friend. The closest thing he had to a brother. When Charlie called Darcy was hard pressed to resist. Even when he was seeking business advice Darcy heeded the call. Fitzwilliam's avocation was medical but he still headed the Darcy Pharmaceutical "Empire", five generations in the making. As much as he would like to he couldn't drop the ball on his family. That was why he took his new job. In order to follow his medical heart and be an unnecessary figure head he had taken a position as the Lady Austin New York Ballet Company's resident physician. AKA La Boheme. Boheme was flexible enough to give him time to be a doctor and business Darcy. Boheme was also the home of Luciana Keene, Darcy's kid sister, Georgiana, was obsessed with the dancer. It was beyond creepy the amount of stuff she knew. He was saturated with talk of the woman. The vacation was a way of preparing himself. Sure, he got along with thespians in high school, but they didn't live their craft. Sighing he ran a hand through his brown curls, closing his eyes he landed back and remained unmoved until he felt the plane start to taxi. _Too late to turn back now._ He thought to himself as he came to terms with his fate.

Soft sweating from the seat next to him made his eyes open, bringing him back to the real world. Beside him was a young woman hissing obscenities at a travel bottle.

"Excuse me." She said shyly turning to him. At a glance she was about eight or nineteen. Behind her glasses her eyes smiled friendlily at him.

"Do you have any Tylenol?" she asked.

"Yha, just a sec." he replied fishing into his pants pocket and extracting his own travel bottle. She thanked him before popping two red and white pills dry.

"You took a risk there miss." He said, slight warning in his voice.

"Pardon the stereotype, but I doubt that first class patrons carry roofie laced painkillers on the plane." She replied. She was sarcastic, he liked that. There was something in her that put him at ease.

"I hate flying." She said.

"You'll get used to it." Darcy replied.

"That's what my dad says, yet we never go anywhere."

"You're flying out of New York, see you've been somewhere." He said.

"I know, but it was a fight. My parents like grass and wine. I have allergies and can't drink." She sounded annoyed. _Why is a Nineteen year old still under her parents thumb?_ He wondered.

"I take it you live in Omaha then?" he said.

"Heavens no, way too much "big red" I'm an Ames girl." She replied, feeling stupid Darcy asked,

"Ames?"

"Ames, Iowa. Home of the Iowa State cyclones. Big twelve, division II." She said as if she was used to the question. "You from New York?" it was more of an observation than question.

"Yes." During their conversation she shut her book, First Impressions. Brit lit. _She's got to be college._

"So visiting the mid – nowhere for business or pleasure?" she asked, he pondered his response,

"Friend of mine bought a farm near Maryton." She broke out laughing.

"You're vacationing in Iowa." She said in a sing – song voice. "Take it from me; Maryton is nothing like New York City." He smiled grimly; this summer was getting shittyer and shittyer.

They talked for a time, comparing NYC to Iowa. She seemed to know about Maryton. They talked about what she liked in New York. The girl was star struck over all the sights and sounds. She had seen the standards as well as a few things he had only heard about.

"I can't wait till college." She said, this made him confused.

"You'll be starting this year?"

"What – no. You thought I was eighteen?" The girl laughed, he felt stupid.

"How – How old are you?"

"Fourteen." She said. Darcy felt like a creep. How could he not tell she was just a kid. His discomfort must've shown because she patted his arm.

"Happens all the time." She said, and then went silent. In the quiet the girl looked him up and down eyes examining him from behind her glasses. "I'm Danni, and you're tall." She finally said.

"Fitzwilliam." Fitzwilliam said, and then cringed. _God, my parents must've hated me. _

"You don't go by that do you?" She observed, "Do you go by Fitz or William?"

"Uh, Darcy or Will works just fine." He said a bit uncomfortable. She smiled totally understanding.

"Fitzwilliam is a good name; I can totally see where you're coming from though. I was soooooooooo close to be Quintessa. My parents were totally on crack." He chuckled. "So anyway you're tall. That is evil – ly unfair." They talked for the rest of the ride, just about any random topic they got off on.

The wheels hit, the plane stopped, people began to file off. With a "see you around" Darcy and Danni were separated in the crowd. Darcy exited the plane and walked slowly to the waiting area.

"DDDDDAAAAARRRRRCCCCCYYYYY" Right on cue a stick in high heels screeched his name as she flung her angular body into his arms. The woman put him in a vice – like headlock as she screeched about how she missed him. He wished she had missed him.

"Hello to you too." Was Darcy's choked reply as he tried to pry the figure off his neck.

"Caroline! Don't kill the man, let Darcy breath." A voice from behind the woman said. The attack on his neck was thankfully over; the woman had been latterly pulled off by her brother. Caroline Bingley was looking over done as always. Her hair was overly colored, overly teased, and overly sprayed. The helmet reminded him of a goodfellas wife crossed with Marge Simpson. Her clothes were ridiculously ugly, as usual. This particular monstrosity involved shades of pink and orange camo, vinyl and three inch heels. It was disturbing. Next to her, looking as he always did was Charles Bingley.

"Bout time you got here." Bingley said as they embraced. Charles was a successful lawyer; however, he had gotten it into his head that he wanted to be a farmer. Poor deranged fool. Oh well, to each his dulcinea, to every man his dream.

From behind Charles emerged Louisa and Dick Hurst. A pleasant distraction from Charles's lobotomized grin and Caroline's lust filled eyes. Louisa was a squat woman, easily passable as a Lane Bryant model.

"How awe ya?" she asked him air kissing his cheek.

"Good to see you Lou." Darcy said. He liked Charles's eldest sister; she was so different from Caroline. Perhaps it was because Louisa had Dick, Dick could calm any woman. The man responsible and the bearer or the unfortunate name soon took his wife's spot and the two men exchanged greetings.

"So are we ready to go?" Charles asked clapping his hands together.

It didn't take Darcy long to retrieve his bags, packing light had its advantages. Danni was there with a mob of people. She made eye contact and nodded her acknowledgement. He did the same. Shortly after his group was able to leave.

_Oh cruel fate, WHY? Why must you mock me so? _Darcy's mind cried out as the journey to Neatherfiled farm began. Some how by the work of Satan he was folded into the back seat of Charles's new truck. Louisa, Caroline, and he were in some new Karma Sutra position, body parts stuck out at odd angles casing the scene to out weird Picasso. It was hot and humid inside and outside. The condition cased him to sweat, Caroline to adhere to his leg and Louisa to fan herself in vain. It was ungodly uncomfortable. Darcy tried his best to keep his hands where everyone could see them, a desperate attempt to prove his innocence. Caroline however was taking full advantage of the situation. She was taking the opportunity to do ungodly things to his body. He wished he had his cup. Sitting with Caroline was a contact sport.

"The weather is here I wish you were beautiful." Charles tried to lighten the mood with some music. Darcy instantly recognized the selection and he was surprised. For the longest time he was the only parrot head.

"Charles, where the hell did you dig this crap up?" Caroline screeched beside his ear. Darcy took offence. Thou shall not insult the Jimmy Buffett. However Fitzwilliam was curious about how Charles had finally came to see the light.

"It's Janie's."

_The skies are too clear, life's so easy today. The beer is too cold, the daiquiri's too fruitful. No place like home when you're far away._

"Who's Janie?" Darcy asked.

"Oh Janie Bennet." Caroline oozed. "She's this little doll Charles's gone out with She's a sweetie." Then lowering her voice, "But rather unfortunate." Darcy realized that he wasn't going to have enough salt to listen to what Caroline said.

After an extremely long and uncomfortable ride the group reached Neatherfield. Fitzwilliam had to admit the house and grounds were gorgeous. The house was a modern glass front A frame with panoramic views of the rolling hills it was hidden in. The place had trees and grass, a novel idea. Perhaps the trip would be a little more bearable. If nothing else he now had a Caroline escape route.

"Welcome home Darc." Charles said pulling the truck into the large detached garage. The group gathered Darcy's things and headed to the house. Louisa threw open the front door and smiled.

"Welcome to the Bingley cave." She said. The group entered.

"You didn't lock your door?" Darcy asked giving Charles a look that seemed to say, "Are you crazy?"

"No one here does. There's no need. Maryton hasn't had a crime in twenty years." Charles said. "Come one I'll show you to your room." Charles led Darcy up a spiral staircase to the loft. The room was large and open with a glass wall and two beds.

"Hope you don't mind sharing." Charles said putting one of Darcy's bags on the empty bed.

"Bingley we lived together for eight years. I think we'll be fine." Darcy said Charles was the easiest man in the world to live with.

"I know you wouldn't care." Charles said smiling. Charles always did that; he was a "smiler". Bingley soon left to give Darcy sometime to unpack and adjust. Slight jet lag was creeping in on him but he pushed it out of his mind as he returned to his friends. He needed his wits about hem when he was remotely close to Caroline.

**-------------------------------------------------------------------**

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**Well it took the single reason for the nation's dependency on foreign oil to get here but here I am. Neatherfield Farm USA. The home isn't too bad; Charles could've done FAR worse in his choice. The house itself is spectacular and the land around it is beautiful. However I've yet to meet the natives so I will reserve my total judgment until then. I need to hunt down the elusive Janie Bennet apparently she's the person Charles's has met that has gotten him all school boy. I do know she has perfect taste in music and from what Caroline has said she's sweet, but I'm not sure how much salt that statement needs. Speaking of Caroline she looks very much the same, like the bastard child of a transvestite hooker and Stephen King's "It." Her room is downstairs across the hall from Dick and Louisa's. Dick has to be on the main floor because he can't hold his alcohol worth shit. I think he once got drunk off ONE SHOT of whiskey. And this is Iowa so we will be drinking a lot. Lou and Charles are both physically well, however I have yet another reason to inquire after Charles's mental condition. He's making me go to this bon fire put on by this pub in Maryton. He knows I hate this stuff. He's writing it off as a chance for meet his Janie. I hate it when he talks me into things. This will be another fine mess he will be getting me into. Heavy sigh.**


	2. Just you Wait Henry Higgins

Chapter Two: Just You Wait Henry Higgins

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"Oh what a beautiful morning, oh what a beautiful day. I've got a beautiful feeling, everything's going my way!" Sang out a tall blonde as she threw open the curtains letting the morning sun into the dim room.

"I'll send something your way!" Growled the bed across the room. The woman in it buried her head under her pillow.

"Are you sleeping, are you sleeping, Sister Lizzy, Sister Lizzy?" The blonde said ripping the pillow off the bed.

"Did anyone ever tell you that you have the voice of a songbird slowly drowning in tar?" Snapped the messy brunette head as the woman sat up sharply, then laid back down clutching her head.

"Elizabeth Luciana Bennet it's the first day you're back in town, you can't be drunk!"

"I'm not so think as you drunk I am…" groaned hiding her smile.

"Elizabeth!" Her sister exclaimed in horror.

"Janie! Janie, I'm kidding. You know I hold liquor better than Fort Knocks. I'm not going to be drunk. But I was in town, that means that the gang's gunna want to party. I walked in the door this morning the time I usually leave for work. I now know why everyone is executed at dawn, who wants to live at dawn!" Jane sighed and pushed a stray blonde hair out or her face.

"Now tell me you have coffee." Elizabeth said, Janie shook her head.

"WHAT?" Elizabeth exploded. "For the love of God you're shitting me." Unfortunately Janie wasn't.

An hour later Elizabeth had finished dramatically shuffling around the house, she was now on her ancient bicycle peddling towards the best (and well only) place for morning coffee, Greta Green's.

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Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

August 21st, 2005 7:02:23 AM CST

Feeling: Tired

Music: Black Coffee; Ella Fitzgerald

The Best Part of Waking Up is Folgers in Your Cup, Damnit

Janie doesn't drink coffee. SHE DOESN'T DRINK COFFEE! She must have suffered head trauma at some point, who the hell doesn't have coffee? First she wakes me up at Seven am, knowing full well that I was out with the gang last night and didn't get in till five, and then she doesn't have any coffee. She doesn't comprehend that I am now on vacation time. I had to go all the fucking way to Greta Green to get a cuppajoe. And everyone was there and they all jumped me. Life sucks. It naturally leaked that I signed for Broadway. I'm excited, but honestly I come back every summer to get AWAY from people freaking out about "How Famous" I am. I am Elizabeth Luciana Bennet. Really. I like being that, it's who I am. So yha everyone freaked out on me. This was even before I had had coffee. Don't fuck with me if I haven't had my Joe for the morning people!

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Hello. This is Liza Bennet's cell phone, Marvin, and I am so depressed. I have fifty thousand times the memory capacity of my owner but all I get to do is answer the phone. Life. Don't talk to me about life. Just leave your name, number, and message after the beep. Her come the beep, God how I hate the beep. It's so cheery sounding. Beep

_Hello, Elizabeth, this is your mother. What is with your voice mail? Is it suppose to be funny? Why can't it be more like your sister's answering machine, it's so sweet and funny. She sings on it you know. Jane always did have a marvelous singing voice. Not that you don't dear, I'm sure some one likes Bea Author after smoking two packs a day for forty years. But your singing ability isn't why I called. You're in town, why haven't you come to see me? You fly to New York for eleven months for some immoral reason. Then you're in town but not doing anything worth whine just working at the bar. The supper club doesn't approve. Why couldn't you been more like Jane - Beep_

_Liza! It's Gaye. Just calling to tell ya I'll be home soon. Can't wait. Jessie will be flying out few days after me; he's got some crazy huge trial that will be a while. But he promised to make it out for at least a week. Oh and I abso – fucking – lutly love you voice mail, who ever could replicate the very sexy Alan Rickman's voice? Anywayz, love you lots, kisses buh – bi!_

_---------------------------------------------------------_

"Janie, what's your answering message?" Elizabeth asked her sister as they sat on the apartment's balcony. The space was small but perfect for mid-afternoon gab fest between two sisters.

"Why do you ask Lizzy?" Jane questioned. Elizabeth gave her a look. "What has she done now?" Elizabeth handed her sister her cell phone. Janie took it.

"It's a slider." Lizzy told her sister after several attempts to flip the phone open.

"I knew that." Janie said finally she got the phone open. "Code?"

"32623" Elizabeth said, her sister's pink nailed fingers typed the code in. Putting the phone to her ear she listened for a second before sliding the phone shut with a snap.

"I'm sorry Lizzy, I---"Jane began, Lizzy cut her off.

"Its okay, Gaye called after that, he's coming next week and Jessie will be coming after his latest trial." Lizzy informed her sister.

"You shouldn't have to put up with that, my therapist says…"

"Can we talk about something else please, like you, lets talk about you." Elizabeth said.

"We always talk about me, what of you. How is the big apple?" Jane replied on the mention of New York she got this dreamy look on her face. Elizabeth rolled her eyes.

"There's nothing to tell everyone's gossiped enough about it all ready dear. Now what of you?" Jane made to protest her sister's less than forth coming answer but stopped herself, in the years that Jane had lived with her sister, all twenty six of them she learned that Elizabeth did not enjoy being talked about all the time or treated like a celebrity, even though she was one. Thus Jane began her chat.

"Classes and school prep are going fine. I'm very excited for this year's crop of students; I have fifteen for mornings and ten in the afternoon."

"Fascinating. Now I heard it on good authority that somebody bought Neatherfield." Jane went scarlet, not a becoming color on her.

"His name is Charles Bingley. He's a lawyer from New York."

"Oh really, Quel est-il aime?" Elizabeth asked leaning forward pressing for information.

"You know I don't speak French." Janie said although she had an idea about what her sister was asking.

"What's he like?" Elizabeth asked again in English this time.

"Oh, he's taller than I am, blonde, blue eyes, Yankees fan. Went to Harvard, Smells really, really, really nice…" Jane drifted off in her thoughts.

"Smells nice, eh? Does my soul sista have a crush on somebody?" Elizabeth teased.

"He asked me out a few times recently, I really like him." Janie said shyly. "I want you to meet him; he promised to be at the bonfire."

"Of course I want to meet him; he needs the Lizzy seal of approval."

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Later that day found Elizabeth again pelting her wicked witch of the west bicycle around town, this time she wasn't heading to Greta's. Her destination now was Lucas Lodge. She soon parked her bike outside a large log building with a slightly faded sign over the door reading: "Lucas Lodge Pub."

"Hello Lottie." Lizzy said to the auburn haired maitre'D. "Popsicle here yet?"

"Yep, in the usual spot with the usual ordered" Lottie replied nodding towards the back by the pool tables. In actuality Lottie's name was Charlotte Anne Lucas, her father, Bill and mother, Eileen, owned the pub. Elizabeth and Charlotte grew up very close; their parents were the best of friends making them best friends as well.

"'Bout time you showed up Lizard!" Elizabeth's father proclaimed as he hugged his second daughter. Elizabeth and her father, Tomas, were the closest out of the family, except for perhaps Elizabeth and Jane.

"Now I want to hear all about New York, no holds barred." Tomas said sitting back in his chair. Elizabeth took a drink of her waiting draft beer before beginning.

"Nothing exceedingly new since last we spoke. New York is still New York, La Boheme is still heaven. Got the pictures back from Marianna and Chris's winter fairy tale wedding, it was beautiful. Fredrick and Anne are getting married, ending their crazy history happily. Gaye and Jessie flew out to see me Opho's closing night; they then took me out after the cast party. It was how they spent their anniversary. And that's about it." Elizabeth said smiling at her father. They chit – chatted for a short time before Lottie came to them barring their usual.

"Double heart attack with cheese." She said placing a double bacon cheeseburger in front of Tomas. Lottie turned and placed a large chicken fried chicken platter in front of Elizabeth announcing, "And a redundantly named fried food. Oh and Benn, when you get a chance talk to Daddy" Lottie told her friend before leaving. Father and daughter attacked their meals and for a time silken was over them.

"New York still treating you well?" Tomas asked after a time.

"Oh yha." Pause. "Is it safe to assume you were the one who broadcast my good news across Iowa?" Elizabeth said smiling mischievously.

"Well why the hell not Lizard, that's big news. Big, big news. Everyone knows you and they all wanted you to succeed." Tomas replied, Elizabeth looked away. "Now I didn't mean that its-"

"I understand Popsicle, I do." Elizabeth said. "You didn't tell mother did you. You never tell her."

"I know you two don't get along, but I love your mama kiddo." Tomas said. Elizabeth repressed her choice words about her mother and remained silent. The conversation died, and didn't fully rekindle even when the girls, the friends, or her dancing was discussed. Finally silence came and was only ended by the squabble for the check at the end of the meal. Tomas won and Elizabeth in toe he went to pay. Bill Lucas was at the counter.

"Betsy! Good to see you girl." Bill exclaimed, he came out from behind the desk and gave her a hug that lifted her off the ground. Soon Eileen was upon her as well. Eileen gave her a large kiss on both cheeks and clucked about her like a mother hen. It took Lottie to rescue her.

"Feeling like you're being pecked to death by chickens?" She asked. Elizabeth agreed and soon the parents regained their composer.

"Betsy, I was wondering if you'd like to do me a favor." Bill said to Elizabeth. She could never say no to him.

"Sure Bill."

"Our second bartender is going back to school and won't be able to work at the bonfire tomorrow. Will you take her shift?" Elizabeth agreed readily, she had always secretly loved bartenders.

"No problem Bill."

"Capital, capital. If you come with your father to set up we'll get you educated."

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Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

August 22nd, 2005 4:32:12 PM CST

Feeling: Psyched

Music: Dancing In the Street; Martha Reeves & the Vandellas; More songs from the Big Chill

Pyro's Delight, Bonfire Tonight

The bonfire is tonight and I can't wait! I LOVE the pond. Popsicle and I just got done with setting up it was a Menage a trois production. Maria the brain programmed the music in like a second. Henry would shit a brick if he knew. We spent the rest of the set up rocking out to the music, like The Big Chill. Minus Jeff Goldblum, oh well, we can't always get what we want. Can't wait for the fire. But now that I think about it, why did I agree to work? Kicks self

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The bonfire began at sundown officially; the party was now into its second hour when Jane and a tall boyishly handsome man approached the bar. He was blond and blue eyed and was wearing a very 80's preppy outfit. Elizabeth would've mocked anyone else in such a get up but this man seemed to be too nice to be mocked. Instantly Elizabeth knew this guy was perfect for her older sister.

"Lizzy, this is Charles." Jane said, "Charles this is my little sister, Lizzy."

"I'm not that little, just vertically challenged." Elizabeth said as she shook Charles's large hand, he smiled in a very charming manner; it was enough for girls with Jane's preference to swoon and melt.

"It's totally trippendicular to finally get to meet you." Charles said excitedly. Lizzy couldn't help but chuckle as she said,

"Likewise." He was a ditzy Clydesdale but still ubber nice and attractive. Elizabeth decided she could put up with him. Small talk ensued and it was full of eighties and some nineties slang, some appropriate, some that probably should've stayed back in the day. They left when a 'finger bang your date' song came on.

"I'll take a rum and a coke." Elizabeth's shift was winding down as a tall man in a white oxford came up to the bar. Her inner-self's jaw dropped and a thought bubble appeared in her mind full of ways to describe just how attractive the speaker was. Trying to remain as calm as possible she made his drink and gave him the best smile she could as he took his glass. Discreetly she watched they hottie go over a few feet and stand watching the dance floor. After a few Janie's boy Charles approached him.

"This isn't gunna fly Darc, stop standing around like a jackass and dance."

"No." Said 'Darc.'

"Oh please, I've never seen so many pretty girls in my life, aren't you in the least in the mood to dance?" Charles persisted.

"Pretty girls, pretty girls? You my friend are with the only pretty girl in the state. Go back to her and enjoy. Leave me and my drink alone." Darc said, to make his point he took a drink of his rum and coke. _Jeez, how did I miss the pole up his ass?_ Charles was in thought for a moment.

"That's Janie's sister Elizabeth over there at the bar." Elizabeth's ears focused even more on their conversation. "She's pretty and from what I hear a lot of fun. Do you want me to introduce you?" The man with a pole in his ass spit his drink out.

"The bartender? Sorry Charlie but I'm not going to dance with some hippie who mixes drinks at a hometown party. What's wrong with her?"_ HULK SMASH! _Elizabeth thought. She'd show him what was wrong with a nice left hook right to the kisser. Good looking her ass. What a bitch. Doesn't he know the difference between hippies and Bohemians? _I might just have to kill him._

After a while Charlotte cam and switched shifts.

"Lottie, I've got a murder plot to hatch." Elizabeth told her friend.

"Partake of my bartender ear?" Charlotte offered. Elizabeth was about to agree when she heard a call.

"Oy Benn!" It was Matt Ethans, a classmate and best friend of Elizabeth's.

"Maybe later Lottie." Elizabeth said noticing the people Matt was with, in particular "Darc."

"Benn!" Matt exclaimed as Elizabeth joined the circle. They embraced, it was slightly difficult, Elizabeth was on the petite side and Matt was on the football/ basketball player side.

"I see you survived the other night." Matt said.

"You should know I can't die." As the group chuckled Elizabeth observed those present. Meg Ethans, Matt's wife was there swollen as ever at seven months pregnant. Janie and Charles were also there with Darc.

"Now Benn, I think you know my wonderful, beautiful wife. As well as your wonderful and beautiful sister." Matt said, Elizabeth concurred that she knew both women all too well. "This is Charles Bingley, the beautiful and wonderful." Elizabeth smiled and waved. "And this is Will Darcy, the—"

"Beautiful and wonderful." Everyone but the man himself finished, the only thing the fuckwit asswhore was finishing was his drink.

"Greetings." Elizabeth said extending her hand. Will took it and Elizabeth smiled sweetly while she squeezed his hand as tightly as she could causing his knuckles to rub.

"Ignore Matt when he says my name is Benn." She said releasing the large hand, Darcy's now hideous face was showing surprise. _What thought that all "hippies" were peaceful and never hurt anyone, Bitch?_ Conversation soon started, the girls gabbed among themselves and so did the men. During the talk she felt eyes upon her. It wouldn't have been Matt; he'd seen her in every way possible. And judging by Jane's blushing Charles only had eyes for her. That left Darcy. _What never seen a hippie before?_ Elizabeth thought. _Fuck you prick_. She was miffed for a moment as to how she could get fid of his condescending stare. The answer came when the first notes of "Hello, I love you" began.

"Oy Matt, you owe me a dance. My funk repression is killing me." Elizabeth said grabbing him by the arm.

"Benn, now be nice, he comes back to me in one piece." Meg warned teasingly as Elizabeth took Matt to the floor.

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Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

August 23rd, 2005 4:32:12 AM CST

Feeling: homicidal

Music: Just You Wait Henry Higgins; My Fair Lady, original cast soundtrack

Just You Wait Henry Higgins

Just you wait, 'enry 'iggins, just you wait! You'll be sorry, but your tears'll be too late! You'll be broke, and I'll have money; will I help you? Don't be funny! Just you wait, 'enry 'iggins, just you wait! Just you wait, 'enry 'iggins, till you're sick, and you scream to fetch a doctor double-quick. I'll be off a second later and go straight to the the-ater!  
Oh ho ho, 'enry 'iggins, just you wait! Ooooooh 'enry 'iggins! Just you wait until we're swimmin' in the sea! Ooooooh 'enry 'iggins! And you get a cramp a little ways from me!  
When you yell you're going to drown I'll get dressed and go to town! Oh ho ho, 'enry 'iggins! Oh ho ho, 'enry 'iggins! Just you wait! One day I'll be famous! I'll be proper and prim; Go to St. James so often I will call it St. Jim! One evening the king will say: "Oh, Liza, old thing, I want all of England your praises to sing. Next week on the twentieth of May I proclaim Liza Doolittle Day! All the people will celebrate the glory of you and whatever you wish and want I gladly will do." "Thanks a lot, King" says I, in a manner well-bred; But all I want is 'enry 'iggins 'ead!" "Done," says the King with a stroke.  
"Guard, run and bring in the bloke!" Then they'll march you, 'enry 'iggins to the wall;  
And the King will tell me: "Liza, sound the call." As they lift their rifles higher, I'll shout:  
"Ready! Aim! Fire!" Oh ho ho, 'enry 'iggins, down you'll go, 'enry 'iggins! Just you wait! I have never wanted to kill someone so badly in my life (okay my life for the last six months) and I include MY MOTHER in this statement. Who does he think he is? Coming into town like he owns the place. Then to go calling people hippies? Argh. If you don't dance that's stupid, but fine, but don't be an asshole! But noooo that assholiest asshole of all the assholy assholes in the history of all assholy assholes had to be an asshole. He ruined my evening he did, I was having fun playing cocktail, it was going just peachy until he pissed me off. It takes a lot out of you trying to formulate a murder plot. Do you know what he said? "The bartender? Sorry Charlie but I'm not going to dance with some hippie who mixes drinks at a hometown party. What's wrong with her?" and he spit his drink out at the thought. Doesn't he know a bohemian from a hippie? How superficial can you get? I know hookers and drag queens that are less so than him. He has just been placed at the top of my 'to kill' list. THE TOP. Janie says I'm over reacting, but she's got the only pair of rose colored glasses so she doesn't give a damn. Lottie however is the cynical bitch I know and love and she totally agrees with me. And this is a better friend in low places because she has that crazy uncle with all the guns. Muwahahahaha. Just you wait Will Darcy! JUST YOU WAIT!


	3. Payback's a Bitch

Chapter Three; Payback's a Bitch

-----------------------------------------

**From the PDA of F. Darcy **

**Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid! What the fuck was I thinking? First I let Charles drag me to that ridiculous party. Then I let that hippie sister of Jane's hear me. THEN I find said hippie extremely attractive. Damn my celibacy. All night after I watched her dance with that Matt guy I heard the likes of the song in such a movie like way that I couldn't ignore it. Hello, I love you. Won't you tell me your name? Hello, I love you. Let me jump in your game. She holds her head so high. Like a statue in the sky. Her arms are wicked, and her legs are long. When she moves my brain screams out this song. Do you think you'll be the guy, to make the queen of the angels sigh? Do you hope to make her see, you fool? Do you hope to pluck this dusky jewel? So stupid, I am so stupid. How could I be attracted to a hippie bartender? She'd probably want me to change my 'capitalist' ways and stop eating meat, with or without a first date. **

**The rest of the night was ruined by that Benn/ Elizabeth chick. But I finally met Charles's Janie. Jane Bennet is perfect for him. Although a littlie reserved. It's very hard to tell what she truly feels. That could be a good thing or a bad one. The bitch looked over done as usual. Sadly she didn't fall in the fire and go BOOM. Maybe she'll just get killed by the children of the corn. Louisa and Dick had a good time, until Dick tried to drink. I've never seen such a light weight. Even CHARLES can drink him under the table. **

**-----------------------------------------------**

Lottie99: So who are we killing?

Twinkletoes: It's in my live journal, I'd explain but I just calmed down.

Lottie99: Ok brb

Twinkletoes: kk don't get lost.

Lottie99: Damn, what an ass.

Twinkletoes: wb you said it.

Lottie99: And he was so cute.

Twinkletoes: Aren't they always

Lottie99: Did you get him back?

Twinkletoes: Sorta I gave him a knuckle rub and then was sexeh

Lottie99: lol aren't you always?

Twinkletoes: Apparently not

Lottie99: I have a plan

Twinkletoes: Oh, do tell; do tell (Chip and Dale (or whatever those chipmunks' names were))

Lottie99: First we gotta talk to Daddy

Twinkletoes: Okay

Join Lottie99 in a chat

_Lottie99: You ready?_

Billneileen: What are you doing Charlotte?

**Twinkletoes: Hey Bill**

Billneileen: Hi Betsy what's this all about?

**Twinkletoes: Read the LJ**

Billneileen: Damn.

_Lottie99: Exactly we're planning revenge_

Billneileen: And I get to help?

_Lottie99: Yep. More than likely they'll be at M&M's street party_

**Twinkletoes: Okay Gaye's gunna be home**

Billneileen: Really

**Twinkletoes: Yeppers**

_Lottie99: Getting off track_

_Lottie99: Getting back on track_

Billneileen: Okay

**Twinkletoes: K**

_Lottie99: Daddy you corner Mr. Asshole and talk to him, Benn you walk by. Daddy, make it so asshole has to ask her to dance. Benn say NO._

**Twinkletoes: Brilliant (Guinness beer guy voice)**

_Lottie99: Aren't I always_

Billneileen: Of course dear. Everything sounds good. Mission Asshole is a go. By the way I like that asshole line. Where did you come up with that?

**Twinkletoes: I didn't it was on a LJ icon**

Billneileen: Oh

End Chat

------------------------------------------

Trivialqueen: What a fuckwit

Twinkletoes: I'd get on you for language but you're right

Trivialqueen: Damn straight. Btw you would know I'm as salty as a sailor

Twinkletoes: That's why I 3 you

Trivialqueen: I 3 U 2

Trivialqueen: Now about the fuckwit

Twinkletoes: He's a fuckwit

Trivialqueen: Prolific

Twinkletoes: He is

Trivialqueen: Anyways…

Twinkletoes: Don't worry I'm getting him back

Trivialqueen: Good just checking

Trivialqueen: God, I g2g I just luv my family Sarcasm lyl ttyl bibi

Twinkletoes: May the shwortz be with you lym

--------------------------

From: kingbing. Jane

What did you think of Janie?

From: fitzwilldarcy. kingbing. Re: Jane

Why are you emailing me from across the room?

From: kingbing. fitzwilldarcy. Re: Jane

Because I want your opinion without distortion

From: fitzwilldarcy. kingbing. Re: Jane

You are such a dweeb

From: kingbing. fitzwilldarcy. Re: Jane

Dweeb-tastic now opinion

From: fitzwilldarcy. kingbing. Re: Jane

She's very nice, quiet, cute, suits you well

From: kingbing. fitzwilldarcy. Re: Jane

I think I love her

From: fitzwilldarcy. kingbing. Re: Jane

Then what are you so afraid of?

From: kingbing. fitzwilldarcy. Re: Jane

Partridge Family?

From: fitzwilldarcy. kingbing. Re: Jane

Yes

From: kingbing. fitzwilldarcy. Re: Jane

But I'm serious, I love her

From: fitzwilldarcy. kingbing. Re: Jane

You barely know her. And she's very candid in her emotions.

From: kingbing. fitzwilldarcy. Re: Jane

I don't care; it's more than a feeling

From: fitzwilldarcy. kingbing. Re: Jane

You're a loony. Now take off Hoser

---------------------------------------------

From: janiebean. kingbing. None

Hey

From: kingbing. janiebean. Re: None

Hi, how are you?

From: janiebean. kingbing. Re: None

Peachy. How are you?

From: kingbing. janiebean. Re: None

Same. What's up?

From: janiebean. kingbing. Re: None

Nothing, just like talking to you

From: kingbing. janiebean. Re: None

I love you

From: janiebean. kingbing. Re: None

Oh Charles I love you too.

-----------------------------------------------

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: Hey

KnightsaysNi: Wuts up little sis?

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: just making sure you're alive

KnightsaysNi: You didn't get my email?

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: I got it, but that doesn't mean I can't talk to you for the hell of it

KnightsaysNi: Language

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: And on that front you're a saint

KnightsaysNi: That better be sarcasm

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: Just one of the services I offer. You're getting slow in your old age dear brother

KnightsaysNi: I love you and will ignore that old age comment

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: You're such a good brother

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: So what's up with you?

KnightsaysNi: The Bitch squawks that she Luvs you

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: Luv means nothing

KnightsaysNi: Charles met someone he really likes

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: Details btw snaps for actually thinking about something other that normal guy stuff for once

KnightsaysNi: Thank you

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: Anyway…

KnightsaysNi: Jane Bennet, 28, blonde hair, blue eyes, about 5'8", nice smile, very sweet, The Bitch Luvs her too, has a younger sister Elizabeth

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: You have learned well grasshopper. So what's this sister like?

KnightsaysNi: You are not playing matchmaker are you?

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: Me? Never, just curious

KnightsaysNi: Fine. Elizabeth Bennet is younger, brunette, brown eyes, has a long neck, short torso, long legs, looks like a dancer, petite

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: That sounds like more than a casual observation. JK

KnightsaysNi: You better be

GeorgieDmusicgoddess: Is she nice? What's she like… like?

KnightsaysNi: Let's change the subject…

--------------------------------------------

Twinkletoes: Twinkletoes is away

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case, coincidence?

Officer I swear to drunk I'm not god.

---------------------------------------------------------

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**Another night of torture. I'm beginning to think that this is the lost ring of hell. We attended another shindig. This one was thrown by the Ethans; they seem to have taken Charles on as a project. Matt was the one who danced with Elizabeth Friday. They're good friends. That means she was there. I was perfectly content with sitting with a beer and staring mindlessly. But she was there, instantly I hear the Doors. She was dancing again. This time with her boyfriend. He was taller that she, but that didn't stop their argentine tango. I can't begin to describe it, other than to use the word perfect. Elizabeth is a wonderful dancer. Blue jean baby, la lady, seamstress for the band. Pretty eyed, pirate smile, you'll marry a music man. Ballerina, you must have seen her dancing in the sand. And now she's in me, always with me, tiny dancer in my hand. Dancer, dancer. I can't believe your dancing. Can't take you home, can't take your dancing. Dancer, dancer, dace the night away. I forced myself to not cut in and dance with her. I'm worried that this is more than a hormonal crush, she's smart and witty, is great fun (well looks it with her friends), and she's pretty. Her eyes are gorgeous. And she hates me. I got cornered by this Bill Lucas, he owns Lucas Lodge, anyway he starts talking to me and Elizabeth comes to the cooler where we were all flushed and pretty from dancing. This Bill tries to get us to dance, and I went along. Oh, to think of how I must've looked all lead and stumbling. She turned me down. But GaH she made me want to dance with her so badly. Then she went back to her boyfriend and they talked for a while, he made her laugh. I would hire a million clowns to make her laugh; it was beautiful, slightly crazy but real. GaH!** **Somebody shoot me. I read what I wrote, I am really mess. Must think straight… Must think… oh, pretty eyes.** **Damn, Damn, Damn.**

**---------------------------------------------------**

Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

August 25th, 2005 2:02:02 AM CST

Feeling: Happy

Music: Payback's a Bitch; Robin Williams, Live on Broadway 2002

S-U-C-C-E-S-S that's the Way We Spell Success

Life is good! Lottie the brilliant's perfectly laid revenge plot went off flawlessly. I spent the night looking sexeh and when Bill had stick – up – the – ass Darcy cornered he was eating out of my hand. I love my friends. And I hate Darcy. But enough gloating I have to start coming down or I may never. Charles and Jane looked very nice tonight. So did Gaye. I'm so glad he's back, he makes everything better. We had a great time dancing, I'm so glad he can dance. It's only been five days but I'm already starting to miss rehearsals and dancing. Gaye found stick up the ass Darcy to be a sexeh piece of man meat hunk o rama. And if he wasn't such a bitch I'd agree with him, but come one the guys superficial. Probably republican. Gaye also insisted the whole night that stick up the ass Darcy was staring at me. I told him the whole story, he found it funny. I guess it is in retrospect but that doesn't mean that asshole Darcy isn't my sworn enemy for all eternity.

----------------------------------------

_A/N: Elizabeth's SN Twinkletoes, Danni's Trivialqueen, Charlotte's Lottie99, Bill's billnelieen, Darcy's KnightsaysNi, Georgiana's GeorgieDmusicgoddess. Email seems self explanitory. Gaye is a nickname for Galen._


	4. I Believe

Chapter Four; I Believe

---------------------------------------------------------------

_I believe that when life hands you lemons you make lemonade, then you find the guy who life handed Vodka and have a party!_

_---------------------------------------------------------------_

"You can't be serious." Darcy said looking over the morning newspaper. It was a week later, Charles and Jane had spent a lot of time together. Thankfully Lizzy wasn't in the picture; he was in the heat of an emotional war; seeing her again would just add more fuel to the fire.

"Of course I'm serious. Janie's got a cabin and everything, right on the Lake of the Ozarks. She invited you all. It'll be great." Darcy suspected that he and Charles defined "great" differently.

"No way Charles, I'm not going to a lake, ew. I think we all should stay here." Caroline said.

"I don't." Louisa said, "This sounds fun, right dear?" Dick agreed.

"Lizzy will be driving, Janie says she's the only one who knows the way, we'd be SOL without her, that's how—"

"Backwoods that place is." Caroline said cutting off her brother, "you guys go, Darcy and I will stay here." _Stay! Abso-fucking-lutly NOT!_

"I think I will go with you." Darcy said.

"Well then I should come too, I don't want to be all alone." _Gag me with a spoon hag._

"Cool beans, Lizzie will be here at six tomorrow morning,"

"WHAT?" Louisa exclaimed choking on her coffee.

----------------------------------------------------------------

"Goood Morning! Its 0600 hours! What's the 0 stand for? Oh my God it's early!" The electronically magnified voice of Jane Bennet shattered the early morning.

"Who the fuck gave her a megaphone?" Louisa grumbled holding her head. Neither Lou nor Dick were morning people. Darcy just chuckled and finished his coffee. Soon there came another voice, it was loud enough without help.

"Ya'll better get your asses out here ASAP, or else Janie's gunna sing and we don't need that!" Elizabeth shouted.

"Ey, ey captain." Darcy muttered putting his mug in the sink. There was a general mumbling of obscenities as the rest of the group followed Darcy's lead as best they could in their various states of awake. Darcy, the most awake, was the first one out. Elizabeth was leaning on the hood of a 1964 VW bus.

"Your chariot awaits." She said. With a nod to follow her she led him around the back to help him with his bag. The back of the bus was empty behind the first passenger seat, but someone had stuck two love seats in the space for more passenger space. Elizabeth hopped into the back and stuck his bag in the cargo area, then made to hop out again. Out of a subconscious habit he offered her his hand. She took it; her hand was completely engulfed by his. Even after both her Converse were on the ground he held her hand. She didn't seem to mind though. She was looking up at him. The queer look on her face got queerer as he turned her hand so that it was palm to palm with his. Darcy was able to bend his fingertips over hers. He found that oddly erotic, she was smallerthan him in everyway. They stood like that in silence for a moment. However after that time she broke the spell.

"You have city hands Mr. Darcy; you've been counting money all your life." Darcy recognized the quoted instantly.

"I don't need this working-class-hero crap." He replied. Elizabeth smiled her eyes shown out from under her trucker cap. He could and would've kissed her right then and there but…

"That car is uglier than I am!" Caroline squawked. Elizabeth and Darcy laughed, dropping hands. Darcy rounded the car and found the rest of his group. Dick and Charles returned to the storage with him to help load.

"Good Lord." She exclaimed attempting to more one of Caroline's pink vinyl bags. "I'd hate to see heavy packing."

"Wait there's more." Dick said lifting bag number two into the back.

"Oh God," Elizabeth said, the bus was running out of room. "There's ANOTHER one!"

"Las one I promise." Charles said. After it was situated Charles handed her down out of the back. Darcy felt a twang of jealous that he quashed as quickly as he could. The men and Elizabeth returned to the women of the group, they had finished settling the house.

"Okay, there's shot gun, passenger seat, and two couches." Elizabeth said. "This vehicle was not built or rebuilt for leg room, sorry about that." She then got in the driver's seat and allowed the rest of the group to figure out their own seating. Jane and Charles automatically went in the back and Caroline tried to cling with him. _I am NOT spending four hours in a seat with her._ Darcy thought and resolutely took shot gun.

"Looks like I'm your co – pilot." He said casually to Elizabeth who was messing with the non-vintage radio.

"You're rather tall; it's probably for the best." She said dryly not looking at him. Her long curly hair was in a thick pony tail sticking out the back of her cap, he noticed that her tiny, delicate hands were attached to thin but extremely well muscled arms. She eventually pulled away from the radio and it began to play Beethoven's "Symphony No. 9"

"Are we all ready?" Elizabeth hollered back at her passengers, Louisa and Dick were directly behind them, Caroline, Charles, and Jane were in the very back. Everyone agreed that they could leave now. There were a few quips about the music made by Caroline, but they were ignored by all and soon the trip began.

Elizabeth was right in saying that the bus was not built for leg room he soon found that his thighs had gone to sleep. In an effort to wake them he jiggled them, his legs falling in time with the last of Strauss's "Pizzicato Polka". Although he didn't see her looking Elizabeth spoke.

"You know the music then?" it was more of a statement than a question.

"My little sister has an affinity for music. She's got me well trained. Although I must say I prefer "Wein, Weib und Gesang" or "Der Zigeunerbaron" from Strauss." He replied.

"She has you very well trained indeed. Now what doesn't this sister play?" She asked. Darcy loved the fact someone was asking about his pride and joy, he felt his chest swell at the happiness about his sister.

"Doesn't play?" That was the only thing that confused him.

"If she has an affinity for music she wouldn't just play one instrument. If you enjoy something to explore all venues." Elizabeth replied. They spoke about Darcy's little sister for a time, about the end of the polka and some of Schubert. Elizabeth's dry manner that had been there when she began the conversation was slowly leaving as she asked questions about the girl. After their conversation died dialogue stopped. After a while Elizabeth leaned forward and fiddled with the stereo again, all the time not taking her eyes off the road. The new song began to play and Darcy watched Elizabeth's giddy display of pleasure at the random choice of the machine. As the singer began the song so did she.

"What is the malted liquor? What gets you drunker quicker? What comes in bottles or in cans? Can't get enough of it, How we really love it, Makes me think I'm a man, I can kiss and hug it, But I'd rather chug it, fill my belly up to here, I could not refuse a, I could really use a, Beer, beer, beer." Elizabeth sang along with animation, bouncing and banging at appropriate times.

"Do you recognize this song?" She asked playing with him. Darcy did in fact, he had been to college.

"Naturally, I'm not that much of a stuffy prick, it was like the fight song, everyone knows it." Elizabeth made a sound that reminded him of a repressed laugh, but he chose to ignore it. To prove his point he joined in on the final part of the song.

"What is the malted liquor, What gets you drunker quicker, What comes in bottles or in cans (beer) Can't get enough of it, How we really love it, Makes me think I'm a man, I can kiss and hug it, But I'd rather chug it, Fill my belly up to here, Golly I adore it, Come on dammit pour it, Do it for me, Brew it for me, Feed it to me, Speed it to me. The most wonderful drink in the world. Hooray!" Both singers erupted in laughter, but as quickly as it started Elizabeth finished. Darcy saw a sort of mask appear over her face and she focused intently and single mindedly on the road. Darcy did the same.

_What am I thinking? I can't have any feelings for this woman. She may be pretty but what kind of life does she lead. She lives with her sister and works at a bar? Society hasn't changed much since the Napoleonic era, I couldn't do that. Even though she is funny and charming. And I've heard from Caroline that she has other sisters. Three others. I trust Caroline very little, but even the Hursts agree that the youngest is a slutty little bitch. I can't get involved. Just say NO Fitzwilliam. NO._ Darcy thought to himself. And he reminded himself every time that he looked at her that she was a no.

The rest of the trip was like that. Elizabeth still sang along with the music but she was not as lively as she was before. He tried his best to remind himself that it couldn't be. _She you are her buzz kill. She's a no._ He also pulled a Henry Higgins_; Let a woman in your life and your serenity is through, she'll redecorate your home, from the cellar to the dome, and then go on to the enthralling fun of overhauling you...Let a woman in your life, and you're up against a wall, make a plan and you will find, that she has something else in mind, and so rather than do either you do something else that neither likes at all You want to talk of Keats and Milton, she only wants to talk of love, You go to see a play or ballet, and spend it searching for her glove, Let a woman in your life and you invite eternal strife, Let them buy their wedding bands for those anxious little hands...I'd be equally as willing for a dentist to be drilling than to ever let a woman in my life, Let a woman in your life, and patience hasn't got a chance, she will beg you for advice, your reply will be concise, and she will listen very nicely, and then go out and do exactly what she wants! You are a man of grace and polish, who never spoke above a hush, all at once you're using language that would make a sailor blush, Let a woman in your life, and you're plunging in a knife, Let the others of my sex, tie the knot around their necks, I prefer a new edition of the Spanish Inquisition than to ever let a woman in my life let a woman in your life, and your sabbatical is through, in a line that never ends comes an army of her friends, come to jabber and to chatter and to tell her what the matter is with YOU, she'll have a booming boisterous family, who will descend on you en mass, she'll have a large Wagnerian mother, with a voice that shatters glass, Let a woman in your life, Let a woman in your life, Let a woman in your life I shall never let a woman in my life._ It didn't work, thusDarcy was left with sleep to curb his thoughts. When he awoke Elizabeth was pulling up in front of a small house on a tree lined road.

"We're here." She announced. There was a scuffle to get everything ready to be brought into the house. As Elizabeth and the rest of the crew got out a voice called to them.

"IIIIIEEEEE!" It shouted. Elizabeth smiled and threw her head back and returned the odd greeting. They grabbed their stuff and Elizabeth led the way to the door.

"So Liz, how's life treatin' ya?" The greeter shouted at her. He was standing on his deck with his dog and no shirt.

"Just peachy Ray." Elizabeth replied she leaned against the railing.

"And the company? I heard about your big news! - "

"Ray, I'm on vacation. Talk to me about that, "News" is a four letter word." Elizabeth shouted back. This Ray laughed and replied,

"You speak my language, girl. I'll let cha get settled." Elizabeth waved and headed inside.

"Who was that Bama?" Caroline asked snottily as the door to the kitchen shut.

"Oh, Ray's no Bama; he just lives in a reality that most people just visit." Elizabeth said setting her bags down and moving systematically threw the upstairs opening windows and blinds. "There are two bedrooms up here and two downstairs plus enough hid – a – beds, bunk beds, and inflatable beds to choke a horse." Elizabeth said as she worked.

"Lizzy and I will be sharing." Jane said, as if pre arranged she moved to the stairs with her bags.

"Dick and I will take on of the rooms up here." Louisa said she was obviously anticipating Dick attempting to drink like a normal person again. That left Charles, Darcy, and Caroline to find rooms. Darcy could scene Caroline's thoughts about them sharing a room.

"And Charles and I will share." Darcy said grabbing his friend's arm and hauling him down the stairs.

"You could feel it too, eh?" Charles said apologetically.

"That's why I'm sleeping with you." Darcy replied. The basement of the house was had a low ceiling and seventies wood paneling. Behind door number one was a tiny bathroom it was opposite what made the hall so small, bunk beds. There was only one other interior door. Jane was leaning on the window sill looking through the glass; they could see that towards the back partitioned off with sheets was another bed. Charles and Darcy stood in the door wondering about their next move. It was no doubt going to be an awkward one.

"Maybe we should sleep on the bunk beds." Darcy whispered.

"Make Caroline switch rooms." Charles replied. Jane turned and jumped at the sight of them, startled.

"Oh hi." She said. It took her a second to notice that they were uneasy about rooming in the connected room.

"I guess Lizzy should've told you." Jane said, Darcy noticed the sign over the windows. '_Jane and Lizzy, the goddesses of awesomeness' room._'

"This is your room I take it." He said, she nodded.

"Well roommates never bothered me, hope they don't you." Charles said crossing to their 'room'.

"Oh no. I'm easy." She replied, a blush in her cheeks. Darcy followed Charles with the bags, his mind flying with things to yell at his friend.

_Oh no, I'm easy. If this is all to get laid I'll kill you asshole._ Darcy's mind shouted at Charles. He dropped the bags and heard the partition being pulled behind him. He caught a quick glimpse of a scowling Lizzy before the vision was completely blocked.

"Everyone does everything just to get laid." He heard her say annoyed. He had to agree but he also felt sorry for Jane, she was just trying to get laid. _But if Charles is having sex with Jane where would the other roommate go…? _

_-------------------------------------------------------------------_

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**What was I thinking when I agreed to this? She is unsuitable for you Darcy, Elizabeth Bennet is a hippie. You have a public image to maintain. And she will not do. She is a hippie. A hippie who knows Strauss from Schubert and Vivaldi from Mozart. God, its perplexing. She has refined tastes and insight, yet is friends with a bamma, knows the words to the beer song, and talks about a company. Oh the humanity. This is like a movie and I don't have a script.**

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

The rest of the day was a bust. Everyone kept to a room and said little, even over the off brand stuff they had picked up at a Casey's. Everyone went to bed early.

Fitzwilliam Darcy under every circumstance was an early riser. He was out of the shower by 7:15, dressed with a relocated neck by 7:30. This house was not built for tall people. He mounted the stairs and was tantalized by the sweet yet odd aroma of coffee. Usually he was the first one up for a long time. Elizabeth was in the kitchen, he was taken aback.

"Morning. Hope you slept well." She said. Her hair was in knotted pigtails at the base of her skull and she work John Lennon glasses. It was unexpected and unnervingly attractive.

"Charles hogged the bed." He replied. She laughed and poured him a cup of coffee, then returned to her seat at the table marked by a large mug and comics. He took the business section and his seat at the other end of the table. They sat reading in silence for a time. Then his brain registered a humming sound. He looked up, it was Elizabeth and she was totally oblivious. He recognized the song.

"The Tango; Maureen." He noted casually. Elizabeth's head popped up. There was that queer look again. She suddenly stood up and walked around the kitchen opening cabinets and drawers.

"Can I help?" He asked.

"S'okay. Just gunna make breakfast, I think I'd be safe." She replied crossing to the refrigerator. She opened it.

"Oh."

"Incase you've forgotten, we have no food."

"I see that moto.1" Elizabeth said. She shrugged and returned to the table grabbing the A&E section she sat down again.

"You gunna read this?" she asked.

"Knock yourself out." He replied returning to the markets.

"IIIIIEEEEE!" A voice announced, it was vaguely familiar.

"Door's open Mad-dog." Elizabeth hollered back.

"Can't Liza." The voice said, it was really familiar. Elizabeth moved, but Darcy was quicker. He opened the door and there was Danni bearing a crock pot.

"Fitz-" She began surprised, but she silenced her with a look.

"I'll take that." He said removing her burden.

"Brought you some bisects in gravy." Danni said following Fitzwilliam into the kitchen.

"We were just discussing our mother Hubbard-ness." Elizabeth said nodding to Darcy as she bustled about to start cooking. "That's Darcy by the way." She said Danni just smiled at him. Elizabeth and Danni clucked around the stove and any offer Darcy made they shot down.

"I hate this stuff." Danni quipped.

"That's the city in you talking." Elizabeth replied tasting the gravy. Danni shrugged and poured herself a cup of coffee. Darcy was standing by the sugar and offered her the bowl.

"No thanks, I like my coffee like I like my men; hot, black, and strong." Elizabeth laughed and the girls slapped hands.

The girls worked at the stove and Darcy watched them from the table. Elizabeth wore short cut offs and a tight tee shirt, her legs were amazingly long and toned. His mouth was very dry.

"Good morning." Life returned to hell as Caroline entered. "Who is she?" The bitch asked pointing at Danni who bristled.

"Danielle Maddox." The girl replied tersely.

"And what are you doing here?"

"Who's all over at Connie's?" Elizabeth asked changing the subject.

"Everyone. Down to Chris and Rose, and nobody knows who the hell I am." Danni said, happier than when addressing Caroline, although still not as ebullient as when it had just been Elizabeth, Darcy, and herself.

"Why don't you move in over here, _I _know who you are." Elizabeth said. Danni laughed and replied that she knew her as well and said she would see. Caroline protested but Darcy agreed.

That afternoon Darcy sat untying the little yellow paddle boat from the aging dock. He had had enough, Charles and have were immersed in their shared world, and Dick was asleep in the shade. Louisa was reading effectively blocking out Caroline, but also blocking out his pleas for help. Elizabeth was adrift out as far as the rope around her ankle would allow. Every once and a while she pulled herself into the dock to refill her margarita glass. Caroline was always with him, clinging to his arm and prancing around in her obscene white one piece that left nothing about her stick skinny body to the imagination. He needed to escape. His only mode of freedom was the dingy. Caroline refused to touch it. Thus he hoped in and paddled out. The bitching from the bitch was drowned out as he paddled, and the exertion was a perfect explanation for why he was breathless as he passed a dozing Elizabeth. It wasn't the fact she was wearing a red bikini top that reviled her toned stomach or the fact that she had the personality to also wear red boy's swimming trunks with it. He was simply winded not in lust. He let his thoughts wander along the lines of her body in more ways than one, and he could've gotten very hot under the collar if he was wearing one. Thankfully he was cooled off by a full blast from a super soaker.

"Sorry!" Danni called swimming over to him as best she could with her water weapon in her hand. She bobbed up and down by the boat and talked to him.

"I was wondering how long it would take you to run." She said.

"What are you talking about? He replied, for a fourteen year old she was speaking to him like a long time friend.

"Me being inside the boat would aid in our tête-à-tête, don't you think?" Danni handed him her gun and pulled herself up on the side of the dingy. It rocked but did not capsize, surprisingly enough. With his help she got into the boat. She was about the weight he expected her to be, not a hardship to lift but no walk in the park either. Once seated in the boat she took off her 'floaty' belt and began to paddle with him.

"Now what do you think of the society in Maryton?" Darcy shot her a look; she wasn't speaking 'American'.

"The society in Maryton?" he replied, noticing his quizzical look Danni blushed.

"Sorry, I'm talking regency aren't I? I finished reading First Impressions and now I can't stop. Any way, what do you think of Iowa?" She shrugged and waited for his response.

"It's not what I expected, thank God, some things are bad, but I've lived through worse." He replied.

"That was cryptic." Danni commented dryly. _What was she playing at?_ He wondered. The question did not bounce around in his head long; she soon came out and said it.

"You met us all at the bonfire, what did you think?" Loaded question.

"It was a nice time, I got to meet Charles' Jane as well as see some of the country side."

"Bull. I know for a fact that you made it clear that you don't dance. Tell me what do you think of Liza now?" Darcy couldn't find words harsh enough to use on himself, someone had heard him and Charles that night.

"I don't dance." He said.

"Truly manly men do NOT dance I take it. I have to warn you, In Iowa, women are more dangerous than shotguns."

"You, ah, heard about that did you?' he asked rubbing the back of his neck.

"I saved you from burning at the stake I think." They turned the boat around and headed back towards the Bennet dock. Elizabeth had pulled herself in for another glass.

"You don't have to wear those trunks Eliza; I know some great thigh shaping exercises that would improve yours." Caroline was saying, Danni choked on laughter and said loud enough for the party to hear,

"At least she's not wearing a WHITE bathing suit." Louisa looked up and hid her laughter, Charles and Jane barely noticed, however Elizabeth did and laughed loudly, the mirth sounding slightly like a dog getting sick. Caroline was too upset to speak, and when she did recover Darcy and Danni were already around the bend and didn't hear her opinion of that "Danielle girl".

"If I saw myself dressed like that, I'd have to kick my own ass." Danni commented as they paddled. "Or if I spoke like that. Elizabeth has dancer's legs. Hell, she has a perfect dancer's body." Darcy couldn't disagree, nor could he shake the feeling that Danni was inferring all sorts of things from the fact. Elizabeth Bennet did have the body that would make a superb dancer. And from what he had scene she was. They made a return pass by the Bennet dock Elizabeth was stretching on the raft her ass high in the air in 'downward facing dog." Darcy was mesmerized by the sight and forced Danni to snatch the steering to fix their course.

"What a unique device, the human tush." She quipped, bringing his attention back to her and not Elizabeth's butt. "An architectural marvel, one of a kind... actually two of a kind. Designed to support our weight for a lifetime of sitting, it also has the subtlety to do the samba. And when attached to certain members of the female species at a time when bathing suits are worn can cause some of us to drive our boats straight into shore."

That evening food was in the house and between Jane, Charles, and Elizabeth it was becoming edible. Danni now wearing her normal clothes but still a touch damp was on the floor going through the music collection.

"Liza, when were you hear last?" Danni asked putting a CD back in its case.

"A brief stint of time in the fall, why?" was Elizabeth's reply.

"Just explaining the Chopin, he's not very summery. Fall however is perfect." Danni comment, Elizabeth and Darcy agreed.

"My sister played Waltz for piano No.1 in E flat major for her audition into Julliard." Darcy said proudly.

"I love that one! Your sister is going to Julliard that is sooooo cool." Danni exclaimed turning to look at him.

"Don't let the company hear you say that! TISHieall the way my dear." Elizabeth laughed.

"It doesn't matter, it's all too expensive, daddy doesn't have the money to shell out, and even if he did he doesn't find it a 'real job.'" Danielle huffed; Fitzwilliam sensed her displeasure with her father's sentiments. He understood G would kill him if he ever thought such a thing of the performing arts.

"You play then?" He asked, she was about to answer when Caroline entered the room, noticing that Darcy was talking to Danielle she immediately tried to divert his attention the Chopin CD gave her a topic.

"Oh! Chop-in are we going to listen to Chop – in! I just love Chop – in with the violins." There was a shattering sound from the kitchen as Elizabeth dropped the glass she was holding. Danielle was dumbstruck, as was Darcy.

"That's Chopin. Fredrick Chopin. Show-pin." Danni said pronouncing the name slowly, flabbergasted and amazed that someone was so ignorant. _With the violins!_

After the Chopin fiasco Caroline went quite and Danni went back to switching music. Darcy sat imagining his sister's reaction to 'Chop-in with the violins.'

"Gumbo YaYa!" Elizabeth announced a short time later, the smell from the kitchen was heavenly and Darcy about floated into his seat. The table was set with a large pot on a pad and martini glasses sporting jalapeños.

"I was in a Cajun mood." Elizabeth said taking her seat on the other side of Louisa who was next to him. Dick was across from his wife, Danni was across from him, Caroline was next to her brother facing Elizabeth and Jane. Dinner began easily enough the Cajun theme was hott indeed, leading all those of drinking age and ability to several martini's. Both Dick and Danni stuck to water. Music drifted around them but was really background until Elizabeth commented on it.

"Danni! Dorian? What did you put in there?" she asked. Darcy stopped to listen, a dark sounding cord sounded and the song ended.

"Dorian, Les Miserables, Jekyll and Hyde, Phantom, and Dracula." Danni replied sheepishly.

"That's not very summery!" Danni simply replied she was feeling gothic, and Elizabeth let it go, blaming the regency she had read. Things passed and "Master of the House" began.

_Master of the house.  
Master and a half!  
Comforter, philosopher  
Ah, don't make me laugh!  
Servant to the poor. Butler to the great.  
Hypocrite and toady and inebriate!  
Everybody bless the landlord!  
Everybody bless his spouse!  
Everybody raise a glass  
Raise it up the master's arse.  
Everybody raise a glass to the master of the house!_

"Oh is this Le Miz! I just love Le Miz! The French Revolution and all." Caroline squawked as the song ended. She was prompted to make such a statement by Danni and Elizabeth's hearty sing along with the recording. Fitzwilliam looked at Danni who was about ready to kill.

"Les Miserables isn't about the French Revolution. That was in 1789 through 1799, this takes place in 1832, trying to kill a general." Elizabeth said patronizingly.

"It's the same thing." Caroline said looking at Darcy.

"No its not." Danni said, Caroline turned her attention to the youngest of the group and said,

"This doesn't concern you, _little girl_."

"Not nearly as much as your hair does." Was Danni's reply in all seriousness. She then returned to her plate muttering, "Condescending bitch." Darcy laughed into his third Martini; he was starting to feel the affects of the alcohol but not too strongly. The rest of the dinner went well, yet again Caroline was too dejected to do anything but sulk into her martini glass and glare around the table.

"I always thought masturbation was the ultimate act of self-absorption." Elizabeth said, she was sitting on the arm of the couch talking to Danni about something or other. But at that line everyone stopped to look at her. "What? I thought it was." She said.

"Aren't you a horny little thing?" Caroline said, she had had a cocktail too many.

"It's not horny. I know horny. I've taken a lecture series on horny." Danni said, she was leaning against the arm that Elizabeth was perched on. Jane made to say something but Danielle cut her off with the rest of her thought. "And yes there is a lecture series on horny." Darcy couldn't resist this new line of questioning, what did she know of it?

"Do you jerk off?" He asked.

"Does a bear have fleas?" Charles replied from the other sofa he was entangled in with Jane, he had had a martini too many as well.

"No, no, "Does a bear shit in the woods?" Elizabeth said laughing.

"Does a bear jerk – off?" Darcy replied, during his boat trip with Danni he got the impression that he was a stuffy person in Elizabeth's eyes, a question like that certainly disproved that.

"You know," Danni began, waving her hand absentmindedly and spoke with total seriousness. "I shit in the woods, but I can't jerk – off." Everyone laughed. Jane playfully covered her ears and said,

"Ahhh I didn't need to hear that. That was an over-share."

"Any one willing to continue that, perhaps in a game of truth?" Louisa asked.

"Truth?" Charles asked.

"Lazy person's version of truth or dare, no moving necessary." Everyone agreed. But for different reasons. Darcy wanted more information on the woman that Charles was falling into love with; Elizabeth wanted a better picture of both Jane's dream boy as well as the dream boy's friend.

"You start Lou it was your idea, ask someone." Charles said.

The games began with Jane awkwardly answering the question, 'Who do you have a crush on?' and play lasted until Danni asked Elizabeth about her period.

"I swear, all night this game's reminded me of a fourth grade sleepover."

Darcy went to bed more torn in his emotions than ever. He had seen her body and herd her mind – 'In fourth grade sleepover terms' he had a crushon Elizabeth Bennet. He fell into a restless sleep and found himself in dreamland.

"_And now Elizabeth, I have you in my clutches, to have my wicked way with you, the way I want to." Darcy said embracing a scantily clad Elizabeth, she was beating on his chest and struggling._

"_No, no, go away, I hate you" Her fight stopped and that queer look in her eyes returned as she looked up at him. "And yet... I find you strangely attractive."_

"_Of course you do! Beautiful women are often attracted to money and power, and I have both, and you know it!" Darcy said tightening his grip on her and bringing her pert red lips closer to his own; his black coat swirled around them._

"_No, no, leave me alone!" Elizabeth cried, but brought his face to hers in a searing kiss, when they broke for breath she said softly, wispy, "No, kiss me!" He did, yet she trough him away. "No! Stop!" This time he couldn't, his lust couldn't be contained. He brought her to him in every way he could. His lips crashing down on hers and hips crashing as well. _

"_Yes, yes! Oh, oh, oh!" Elizabeth moaned. He thrust his hips against hers so she could feel his frustration. "Ohhhh, your "helmet" is so big!"_

Fitzwilliam awoke from the dream in a sweat. _Elizabeth and… Space balls? What did I drink?_ He looked around, all was quite, Charles was passed out like a dead man. He didn't take liquor well. Laying back down he tried to think about anything else.

The next morning Darcy awoke early yet again. He was a little worn; the liquor and Elizabeth dream slowed him down a bit. He showered and dressed and went up stairs. Both Elizabeth and Danni were up and making breakfast.

"Morning." Danni said greeting him. Her dark mane was reined back in a ponytail and she was still in her pajamas. Elizabeth was also in her pajamas as well, the top was one of those body shirts so it looked like she was in a corset, along with the over grown cover up she wore cloth shorts with lettering across the butt reading 'Hey everyone, look at my ass.' He tried to focus else where.

"Whattaya think of water skiing today?" Elizabeth asked from the stove.

"Sounds fine, I haven't done that in years." He replied. The breakfast conversation was pleasant, Danni kept it that way and Darcy truly enjoyed himself. Jane was the next one up, she didn't look good at all, her martini hadn't agreed with her.

"Morning dear." Elizabeth said, Jane grasped her head and gowned.

"Not so loud." Was the weak reply.

"You okay honey?" Danni asked helping her to her seat.

"Coffee." Was the choked reply. Louisa was the next out of bed; she was incoherent until her second cup of coffee. Till that time she was like Ozzy Osborne – mumbled obscenities, slurred speech, and shuffling about.

"Good morning!" Dick announced entering the room later than morning.

"Eat shit and die." Was all Louisa had to say.

Elizabeth fluttered about the bass boat – a water vestal built for speed. Danni sat in the captain's chair talking with her.

"Oh water skiing, I just love water skiing!" Caroline's shrill voice rang from in the house. Darcy and Jane both looked at each other in pain. They had been attempting to find skis that fit. Turning to Elizabeth Jane spoke seriously,

"You're going to need a bigger boat."

Everyone had loaded into the pontoon boat, something with more room than the bass had to offer. As she drove out she said.

"Since Mad-dog has never skied before, I'm taking to the cove; we can help her up there."

The cove was pleasant and secluded. Elizabeth stopped the boat and Danni hopped out into the water as did Elizabeth – after giving Jane the wheel. Elizabeth hit the bottom and was able to walk, the only thing above the lake, however was the crown of her head. When she resurfaced Darcy called to her.

"Gidget get back in the boat, you won't do her any good. I'll do it." And to prove his point he stepped out into the water and walked over to her, shoulders about the water. Elizabeth stuck her tongue out but side stroked back to the boat. Darcy stood behind Danni and told her what to do. Once her feet were in the skis and the tips were elevated he took hold of her waist and prepared to set her up. She was wearing a modest blue two piece suit that still managed to show her not so toned stomach. He thought that the suit was prefect for a girl her age. Cute but not jail bait. Danni nodded to Elizabeth like a bull rider in the shoot and the boat took off. Danni managed to pull herself up and was on her way with a great war - whoop from more than one person.

"I don't see why she gets a hero's praise. Skiing is easy; I could probably be a proficient at it if I got on." Caroline said to the party around her after Danni's maiden voyage on the skis. Dick and Darcy looked away, Jane and Charles 'didn't hear her', Danni flipped her the bird when she wasn't looking, and Elizabeth gripped the wheel tightly, pretending it was Caroline's neck.

"You're being an asshole." Louisa whispered to her sister mortified.

"That's her name, sir, Asshole, Major Asshole!" Danni said smiling playfully. Elizabeth caught the joke.

"And her friend?" She asked nodding towards Darcy, Danni cracked a smile.

"He's an asshole too sir." Darcy glared at her good naturedly, another Space Balls reference, "Gunner's mate First Class Darcy Asshole!"

"How many assholes do we have on this ship, anyway?" Louisa asked.

"Yo!" Replied Charles, Danni, Elizabeth, Dick, Jane, and Darcy.

"I knew it. I'm surrounded by assholes!"

That evening Darcy sat on the deck reading a book he dug out of the living room. But his mind couldn't keep the page he was watching the dock where as the sun sat music played; 'Seven Seas of Rhye'. Elizabeth and Danni were still on the dock, Elizabeth was frolicking on the dock – leaping and spinning. Danni was doing her own thing and the girls were having a grand time. This was why Darcy found himself gaping down at the tie up. The song was winding down and Eliza started at the water and ran and jumped, she however did something wrong because instead of sticking the leap she fell forward. Darcy imminently popped out of his seat as Danni rushed over to her. Elizabeth attempted to get up but she was more hurt that a lie could cover. Darcy rushed out to the wharf as Danni and Elizabeth made their way up. Danni was carrying as much of Lizzy as she could physically lift. With not a word to either party Fitzwilliam scooped up Elizabeth and carried her with ease up to the house where Charles and Jane were watching from expressing their worry in a nonsensical manor. Darcy carried her into the house and set her on the counter, Danni brought him a chair and Jane found the first aid kit. The first order of business was looking at her hands. They were scratched up and bruised but not particularly bloody. He was about to hand her off the counter when he looked down, there was blood on the floor; it was rolling off her foot.

"Shit!" he exclaimed.

"What?" Elizabeth cried looking down. Darcy wrapped his hand around her ankle; he literally was able to meet his fingers all the way around. She was tiny, ridiculously so. And sticking out of her right foot was a chunk of wood. Darcy's mind was in full doctor mode as he began to tend her foot. He didn't even notice the fact that the splinter he pulled out of her foot was more of a log. After he bandaged her he handed her down gingerly he realized the size of her foot. She stepped cautiously on her foot, it was a little tender.

"How long till healed?" she asked; now they could tend her hands.

"Depends, a week or two. I wouldn't suggest driving tomorrow. Fact, I won't let you." Darcy said cradling her hand as he cleaned it.

"What are you, a doctor?" Elizabeth jested.

"Actually, I am." Was his dry reply.

"Poker anyone?" Danielle asked producing a deck of cards and chills. Everyone was now inside, the sun was down. Elizabeth and Darcy agreed, as did Dick and Caroline. _Does she _not _have a mind of her own?_ Darcy thought trying to sit as far away from her as he could. The game began and soon a betting patter was established, everyone doubled, no one really cared, they just always doubled. Darcy observed this.

"The double up poker player, twice the size in everyway."

"He vould have an enormous schwanzstucker" Elizabeth said in a Scandinavian accent as she arranged her cards.

"That goes without saying." Darcy replied the dialogue was very familiar.

"Voof." Danni interjected.

"He's very popular."

They had been drinking again and Darcy had to help Charles into bed. When he returned to the living room Elizabeth and Danni were entangled on the sofa both in their pajamas. They were watching a black and white film.

"What's this?" he asked coming and standing behind the couch.

"I don't know." Elizabeth said staring at the TV.

"What's it about?" Darcy tried again.

"I'm not sure." Elizabeth replied.

"I think the guy in the hat did something terrible." Danni said, Elizabeth concurred. Neither had looked at him yet.

"Like what?" Danni sat up and looked over at him her glasses down her nose.

"You're so analytical." She said before lying back down and waving her hand at the movie. "Sometimes you have to let art... flow... over you." The man on the screen in the hat spoke.

"Springen sie zeit fur Hitler." He said.

"Is that German!"

The next morning Darcy woke extra early, he didn't think it was best for her to be driving on her foot that freshly injured. He would drive; she could like it or leave it. Walking through Elizabeth's room was the only way to the hall and his eyes were drawn to the bed. Jane was looking peaceful and gorgeous, sleep didn't take anything away. In fact it only seemed to add to her innocence and sweetness. Elizabeth on the other hand was sleeping like she lived. Sprawled out, her mouth was open and she had definite gravel to her snore. Like an angel… with sinus trouble. He was drowning in emotion and could not reach the storm, for the best he crept to the stair and contemplated breakfast.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**Back from Deliverance. It was utter hell. Where should I start? Uh,**

**First The bitch can now add unholy to her name. She didn't want to go but did. And her bathing suit was hideous. White! White bathing suit and always with me! She tried to impress me, but the only thing it did was make me laugh. She actually said Chop-in and the violins. She was terrible to Danni, the high schooler from the plane.**

**Danni – she was there. And she knew a lot. While a great ally against the (unholy) bitch she was also Lizzy's advocate. **

**Lizzy. God, Lizzy. She's utterly stunning. Funny too. God, celibacy is killing me. Charles' happiness with a Bennet makes me crave one too. NO! Elizabeth is her own person. A hippie, I'm in lust with a hippie. No. I'm in love with a woman who is smart and cultured. More like a bohemian. I'm in love with a bohemian. But it could never work. I mustn't do that to any party involved. I will get over this. She slept on the way home, head thrown back. She probably needs a massage. Oh I'd love to giver her one. I can fit my hand around her ankle. She's so small. Stay strong Fitzwilliam, no matter how beautiful and unique she is, she is a no.**

**------------------------------------------------------------**

1 MOTO – Master of the Obvious

_A/N Longest chapter I think. Hope nobody's too utterly confused yet. Thanks for reading!_


	5. Good Bye Earl

Chapter Five; Good – bye Earl

* * *

From: williamcollins. Meeting you

My dear cousin Jane,

Although we have never met I write that my dear father recently died and I have now looked back on life and would like to change this. I know that our fathers did not get along, but I am a pastor and would like to extend the olive branch so that I up hold my duty as a minister and lead the good Christian way. My patroness Lady Cat de Bourgh expressly informed me that it was what I should do. She was so gracious and said I should spend a week in Maryton – even Sunday. That is how much she supports this idea, she greatly prefers my sermons, but will sacrifice the pleasure for me to make amends. I will arrive in a week come Monday and stay through the following. I wasn't able to find a hotel in Maryton on the internet but I'm sure there is one. If you could get me that information I would be much obliged.

God Bless,

William Collins, Reverend

From: janiebean. Re: Meeting you

Dear William,

There really are no hotels in town, but even if there were I wouldn't make you stay in one. You shall stay with my sister Elizabeth and me at my apartment. I was surprised to receive your email, Father hasn't talked about your family in ages, but I am pleased to see some reconciliation between us. It's a bummer that our fathers were so stubborn. Elizabeth and I will meet you at the Omaha airport on Monday.

See you then,

Jane Bennet

* * *

Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

September 10th, 2005 3:51:09 CST

Feeling: Confused

Music: Who are You; The Who

Didja ever look at a dollar bill, man? There's some spooky shit goin' on there. And it's green too. (I'm Dazed and Confused.)

I am so confused. It's making my head hurt. Why, you ask, is Lizzy confused?

1. The metric system- damn conversions

2. Darcy, Will Darcy. Jane suggests that I now like him. She points out all of his points I have dated in other men. To find a man agreeable whom one is determined to hate! Do not wish me such an evil. He came with Charles to the lake last week. He was handsome still, but also funny. He recognized quotes and played off of people. He was not the bitchy SOB I once thought. Argh! He was always looking at me. What does it mean? What does it mean? Stupid man, evil man. I will hate him always. ALWAYS. Even if he is a doctor and took care of my foot when I jammed that log into it. He could fit his hand around my ankle. That didn't excite me, that didn't turn me on, it didn't it didn't! I did NOT just write that. Argh! My head is such a mess on this score I don't know what to think at all. Just remember Lizzy, he doesn't know a hippie from a bohemian. Stupid Git.

3. Caroline Bingley. Not really a confusion factor but an anger one. Weeelllll,  
Kyle's mom's a bitch, she's a big fat bitch, She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world, She's a stupid bitch, if there ever was a bitch, She's a bitch to all the boys and girls.  
On Monday she's a bitch On Tuesday she's a bitch On Wednesday thru Saturday she's a bitch Then on Sunday just to be different, She's u super king kamehameha bitch Have you ever met my friend Kyle's Mom, She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world, She's a mean old bitch, she has stupid hair, She's a bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch Bitch, bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch She's a stupid bitch, Kyle's Mom's a bitch, And she's such a dirty bitch. Talk to kids around the world, It might go a little something like this... Sung in three different languages by other children Have you ever met my friend Kyle's Mom, She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world, She's a mean old bitch, she has stupid hair, She's a bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch Bitch, bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch. She's a stupid bitch, Kyle's Mom's a bitch, And she's such a dirty bitch; I really mean it, Kyle's Mom, she's a big fat, stinking bitch Big old fat fuckin' bitch, Kyle's Mommmmmmmmmmm .Yeahhhhh, Chaaaaa This is the only way I can describe her, and when ever I think of her I hear this song. She's looking to jump Darcy's bones, and I wish she would. He is in more dire need of a blowjob than any white man in history. I did NOT just think about blowjobs and Darcy. I did not. The image, my retinas. My poor retinas. Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! Getting off track. Getting back on track. Caroline Bingley is a bitch from hell and should die. Danni is totally with me on this one. We had a lot of fun pissing her off. She wanted Darcy to save her from this spider that was in the bathroom. I believe Danni said, "Honey, there's a spider the size of a Buick in your bathroom." She was freaking out over a spider. So Danni used her shoe to kill it. Danni came out and just yelled, "THIS IS GETTING RE-GOD-DAMN-DICULOUS" I love that girl.

4. Mad – dog. She was getting on really well with Darcy. Like she knew him from before. They played off each other the most. Like she genuinely liked him, which is weird because she was the one who deemed him the fuckwit. But they did shit together. Like rode around in the paddle boat and sang that one Jaws song, its like; Farewell and adieu to you fair Spanish ladies / Farewell and adieu you ladies of Spain. / For we received orders for to sail back to Boston / And soon never more will we see you again. He has a really good singing voice. Argh! Enough with his good qualities. He's a fuckwit asshole from the tenth ring of hell! GaH! Bangs head against desk

5. Who the hell is William Collins and why is he coming to stay with me and Janie!

This is really pissing me off, all of it.

* * *

Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

September 12th, 2005 3:51:09 CST

Feeling: Annoyed

Music: The Christian; Jimmy Buffett

Family, gotta love 'em; 'cause you can't kill them

I seriously want a second opinion about that. Our 'dear cousin' William Collins arrived today. In fact he's blathering on about this rich chick who's his 'patroness' as I type. Odious man. He's rather like a toad. And a midget. A todget, that's what he is a todget. He's shorter than I am. I didn't think that was possible, but it apparently is. The todget keeps croaking on and on about shit that is even too boring for Mary. And she reads medieval literature. How can this man, no thing, be related to me? A first cousin no less! I know that Popsicle always said "Stupid men are the only ones worth knowing, after all." But this is re-god-damn-diculous. He's shorter than I, has brown hair that he didn't rinse very well – it's all greasy, his skin is oily, his face holds an imperialist manor and his facial expression is that of distance as he looks at his surroundings. He's wearing suspenders and a sports coat – its September. And I thought Darcy had a cob up his ass. And this guy is just so… so Christian. And not the good kind of good person. I've got nothing against religion you have yours I'll have mine. But he's smothering religious. There is no wonder why he's single. This is how crazy this mo'fo' is, he asked what I did and I told him. I danced and on vacation worked for a bar. He instantly latches into this rant about the evils of alcohol and the immorality of theater. Then he asked what dancing I did. I have scared the shit out of him, I replied exotic. He about had a heart attack. Then he tried to save me. I better go, the todget is talking to me again. Let's see what will condemn me to hell this time.

* * *

Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

September 12th, 2005 9:15:06 CST

Feeling: Frustrated

Music: I Want to Break Free; Queen

You're stupid, with two 'oo's

I couldn't take it any more. William Collins is stupid – with two 'oo's! I'm now sitting with Gaye, Jessie, Lottie, Matt, and Meg at the pub. Everything is a little better with friends and beer. They're finding the whole situation very funny. Us heathens must stick together. I can't decide if my friends are the best or worst thing that ever happened to me. But they've happened to me. We're hatching a plan about how to annoy this guy. So far we're thinking drunken orgy and gay pride parade. Or maybe telling him I'm Bah' I and bi. That would make him go bye – bye. He's only been here like six hours and I already want him gone. He really sucks.

* * *

Elizabeth stood behind the bar at the Lucas Lodge Pub preparing for lunch. She was subbing for Charlotte who had a doctor's appointment. Elizabeth had made a big deal about going to the bar that morning for the shear pleasure of inflicting pain on her cousin. She really hated him. Yet for all her trying he seemed to not hate her.

Around one Charles, Dick, and Darcy entered the pub, it was relatively quite, it was a Tuesday, the week's most worthless day and only a few people were there. Charles greeted her warmly and after ordering a pitcher inquired after the pool tables in the back. He and Darcy (who had merely nodded to her) took the beer and Dick found the sticks and they began to play. Elizabeth tried not to watch them. Even though the sight of Darcy leaning over to shoot was unnervingly appealing to her.

At about four a man entered the pub. He was dressed in casual air force clothes and was rather handsome. He walked up to the bar and ordered a beer. Elizabeth smiled at him – he was new, she could tell that much and she didn't want to be cold to an alien in town. Besides he was good looking. He sat down at a stool and since he was the only one there she chatted him up. He said his name was George Wickham and he was in fact new to the Midwest. He was stationed at Offutt after returning from Iraq. After about a half hour and two beers downed by George the Bingley party came to pay and leave. Darcy eyed George the whole time that Charles and Elizabeth talked. Like he was staring down an evil force. George just stared back. After they left George turned to her again.

"So how long has Darcy been in the neighborhood?" He asked, failing at being casual.

"Dunno, about a month. You know him then?" Elizabeth replied.

"Surprising isn't it, given our cold lack of greeting just now. But yes I know him. I know him very well." George said. Elizabeth leaned on the bar. She was liking this Wickham, he had easy conversation skills. Perhaps not the fastest at sarcasm, but very carefree none the less. "He is the reason why I'm in the air force."

"Oh really?" Elizabeth said. "Partake of my bartender's ear?" She asked. Anything about Will Darcy's character intrigued her.

"Oh yes. We grew up together our father's were friends, great friends. Old Mr. Darcy was my godfather and business head of the company that my father was on the board of. Darcy and I were raised almost as brothers and up until college we were fine with that. Then college came, and my father died. Mr. Darcy took me in fully. He promised to provide for me. I wanted to go to Harvard and study," he paused and liked his lips, "theology, become a pastor. However after my first year at school Mr. Darcy died. Will took over the money. He gave me some, but not nearly enough for Harvard. So I had to drop out. I had to join the military to pay for my schooling. I totally had to drop my ideas of the church. Then I got sent to Iraq…" George said. Elizabeth's first response, given her fiery nature was pure unadulterated hatred. She cursed Darcy for being an asshole. And she cursed herself for not cursing him enough for that fact.

"That's terrible George, just terrible." Elizabeth said.

"Oh don't fret about it, I am quite content – I'm serving my country and seeing more than I ever would've seen as a rector." Elizabeth was about to reply when Lydia Bennet bounded into the pub.

"Lizzy!" she exclaimed bouncing over to the bar. _Good Lord, what is she wearing?_ Elizabeth thought looking at her youngest sister in hot pants and a tight v – neck tee shirt. _And they let her in school like that. _With that thought Elizabeth felt exceedingly old.

"Lizzy, Lizzy I don't get this." Lydia whined slapping down a sheet of paper. "Mr. Beeson is a bitch! It's the second day of school, I don't know how to doe this!"

"Hey. Tomas Beeson is not a bitch, I had him when I was your age, for a math teacher he's pretty awesome." Elizabeth snapped at her sister. She wasn't sure what the worksheet would bring – Lydia was a senior and Elizabeth hadn't done serious math since college. But she looked at it anyway.

"Lydia honey, this is algebra one. Freshmeat math." Lydia whined that she didn't care if it was Kindergarten math – she didn't get it. Lizzy sighed and dug around under the counter for something to work the problem on.

"Oh, hello." She could hear Lydia say – she must've finally seen George. "What's your name?" Yep, she had definitely seen the signal man, her voice was instantly flirtatious. Lizzy didn't worry; George was one of the good guys and knew that Lydia was a high schooler.

"Okay Lyd, pay attention." Elizabeth said resurfacing with a pencil, pad, and calculator. "The first problem; a + 5 9a – 11, solve for a." Elizabeth said writing it on her pad.

"What's the first step?" She prompted.

"Get the variable on one side of the equals sign." George said after a silence from Lydia. "Sorry, I always liked math."

"No problem." Lydia said she wasn't focusing on her sister's lesson, just on George.

"A equals 2" Elizabeth said after working the problem entirely by herself.

"What?" Lydia asked.

"A equals 2" Lizzy repeated.

"How?" Elizabeth rolled her eyes and explained that all the steps she took were on the page. Lydia whined about how not nice Elizabeth was for not explaining it to her again, but Elizabeth didn't budge. _How the hell is she passing? _Was all Elizabeth thought on the matter. So in a huff Lydia left, leaving her instructions behind.

"I'll give them to her." George said fishing into his pocket. "How much?"

"It's on the house. We always support our troops." Elizabeth said. And with that George grabbed the page and scampered out of the pub.

* * *

Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

September 13th, 2005 10:30:08 CST

Feeling: Murderous

Music: My Stepdad's Not Mean (He's Just Adjusting); Death to Smoochy Soundtrack

DEATH TO DARCY

Track down this murderer! He must be found! Your hand at the level of your eyes! Track down this murderer - He must be found! Hunt out this animal, who runs to ground! Too long he's preyed on us - but now we know: the Phantom of the Opera is there deep down below . . . He's here: the Phantom of the Opera . . . Track down this murderer - he must be found! Hunt out this animal, who runs to ground! Too long he's preyed on us - but now we know: the Phantom of the Opera is there deep down below . . Who is this monster, this murdering beast? Revenge for Piangi! Revenge for Buquet! This creature must never go free . . . Ignore anything remotely good I said about Will Darcy. He is the devil incarnate. I met this solider, named George Wickham, he was at the pub during my shift and he knows Darcy very well. Well enough to get fucked over by him. After Darcy – no Satan – was done with him George had only one option – the military and Iraq. Death to Darcy!

Comments: (3)

Replies: (2)

**Yha, Kill Him**

I'm so with you Lizzy. George is sooooooo nice – he offered to help me with my math.

Comment by lydangelicdevil

**Let's Think About This**

Lizzy you're acting on impulse again. Let's think. What's a military guy doing in a pub on a Tuesday afternoon? And he just came out and told you what ever history he did – I know people open up to bartenders but I don't buy it. Just be careful. Okay? Btw is Collins that guy with Janie at Greta's this morning?

Comment by Lottie99

**Whose Side Are You On?**

Lottie don't tell me you're on Darcy's side. I thought better of you, I really did. I'm sure that George was just on leave or something. He's honorable I'm positive – he's just back from Iraq. As for the todget – don't call him Collins. Tom Collins is the only Collins. Yes that was him. Greasy isn't he?

Response by Twinkletoes

**I've Got To Meet These People**

Luci, I hope you noticed that you only used the mob lines from Track down this Murder. I find that fitting, only one player gets his say. In that song Erik had good reasons, perhaps Darcy does as well. I'm with Lottie on this one. I wouldn't trust him so explicitly. And he's offered to help Lydia. Do you think that's wise? Even if your trust him, do you trust her? You can hate Darcy but hate him because he's stuffy, not because of hearsay. Yes I'm calling it hearsay even if it is 'from the horse's mouth' that's exactly how I feel about it. On a slightly lighter note, Gaye and I have GOT to meet this 'todget' guy. Perhaps if we get together. Gaye wants your cute butt and ours together. So how 'bout tonight we could go to Council Bluffs, hit the Squeeze In and go dancing?

Comment by Jessie

**Maybe, Maybe Not**

After that bash session I'm not so sure Jessie my man….. Okay Just kidding yha that sounds good. Wait, why am I posting this? Ignore me!

Comment by Twinkletoes

* * *

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**What is he doing here? How is it that he always can pop up when I just start to feel rid of him? He got on so well with Lizzy – God Lizzy! She probably thought him quite attractive. I hope – I pray she didn't find him quite believable. But she probably did – Danni gave me the what for on how I treated her and how big of an ass I am. But I hope I changed that over the weekend, If George makes Elizabeth hate me I don't know what I'd do, it'd be the last straw. First Dad, then G, and now Elizabeth? It cannot be. I glazed over the details with everyone but Caroline so that just incase they can help play defense with me. I won't leave that's for sure. I can't run forever, hopefully this situation won't call for it. Charles is staying for another month but I only have a few more weeks. Hopefully this will iron its self out. But probably not.**

* * *

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**I just read myself. I am such a fuckwit. I made no sense at all. I must remain strong and level headed. I have two weeks and then hopefully I will fall out of love with Elizabeth and if George spreads what ever he's bullshit he is I won't have to deal with it.**

* * *

Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

September 14th, 2005 1:03:48 CST

Feeling: Confused (again)

Music: Confused; Natalie Brown

Earl Had to Die, Goodbye Earl

I haven't quite decide on who Earl is, at the moment I have too many people on my 'to kill' list to make a definite decision yet. I take it back. I'm going to kill the todget, Jane will help me. People JANE will help me. Doesn't that tell you something about how annoying and icky this guy is? As for the other Earl that I will kill – I don't know. For a while I wanted to kill Darcy (on two separate charges I might add) but everyone has talked me down. They aren't convinced of one of the allegations. The one made by George. Of course now I'm questioning my entire views on him, Darcy, and not objecting to his tutoring Lydia. Perhaps now would be the time that I learn how to run away from my problems, like mom and dad. I go back to the city in two weeks I could just not solve anything and go. The more I think of it the better I like the idea. I'd be at home and at work; the two places I love more than family. I'd be away from Lydia, George would be at Offutt, and Darcy would be where ever the hell he's from and so will Caroline the bitch. This could work.


	6. What is this Feeling?

Chapter Six; What Is This Feeling?

* * *

Excerpt from William Johannes Collins' Journal

Page 193

Life in Maryton isn't what I expected at all. I had hoped it would be far more religious than what I found it to be. Cousin Elizabeth is a dancer and a bartender – she will surely be condemned to hell. Lady Cat always says those are the two most unholy places ever; "The Theater and the bars Mr. Collins, the Theater and the bars need to be saved most of all." I should marry her – save her. Lady Cat's lawyer, lawyers she has more than one of course, her lawyers found a loop hole in Mr. Bennet's will that gives me quite a lot once he dies. In marrying one of his daughters I will keep it in the family.

* * *

**From the PDA of C. R. Bingley III**

**Darcy really needs to change his password. He uses Georgiana's name for everything. It was easy to hack his personal journal. I on the other had just changed mine from mother's name to 'Janie'. I probably shouldn't have typed that. Oh well if someone's reading this it's too late they already knew my password/ hacked me. Oh yha, this entry isn't about passwords. It's about Darcy. I read his entries. Aside from thinking I'm on crack, Dick a light weight, and my sister a bitch (two out of three of those I agree with) he also thinks Jane is a fine girl. That makes me happy. I really do love Jane with all my heart. Jane Bingley that sounds perfect. He also thinks, no, knows that he's in love with Elizabeth. I suspected as much and now in black and white I have proof. This brings me to faze two of my plan. Enlist Jane and throw a party so Darcy and Elizabeth can hook up. Everyone deserves love and the same happiness I have when I think of Jane – if that's possible. I'll write it off as a going away party or something. Elizabeth Darcy. That almost sounds as good as Jane Bingley.**

* * *

**From: kingbing. Party?**

**Hey, I have a plan, I need an ally.**

**From: janiebean. Re: Party?**

**Details**

**From: kingbing. Party?**

**I want to get Darcy and Elizabeth together**

**From: janiebean. Re: Party?**

**Play matchmaker?**

**From: kingbing. Party?**

**Yes**

**From: janiebean. Re: Party?**

**Do that to her and they'll be outlining you in chalk**

**From: kingbing. Party?**

**Then don't think of it as matchmaking. Just getting to know each other. He's leaving soon and I have it on the best authority that he's in love with your sister. Now what kind of music and who should come?**

**From: janiebean. Re: Party?**

**I love you.**

**Music:**

**Musicals – I can bring those, she made me some copies.**

**Classic Rock/ Jimmy Buffett**

**Classical – here again I can bring that**

**People:**

**Well our cousin is here (don't get me started on him)**

**But I think you'd also need Lottie, M&M, Gaye, and Jessie to make it an actual party.**

**Oh, and if this thing backfires it's all your idea and I had nothing to do with it. I only see Lizzy once/ twice a year, I'm not making her mad.**

**From: kingbing. Party?**

**As you wish**

* * *

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**Dumbass is throwing a party. Totally impromptu BYOB affair. Says it's my going away present. I don't know why he's giving me a parting gift, but if he wanted to give me a good one, a party would not be it. The perfect gift would be the anti – party. But nooooo we're having cheep beet and dancing – his house is too pretty for that but yet that's the plan. I smell trouble.**

* * *

The party was almost two hours underway before the Bennet girls and their cousin arrived. Jane came to where Charles and Darcy were imminently, like a messenger.

"Sorry we're late; Collins didn't really want to come." Jane said.

"How did you convince him?" asked Charles curiously, Jane turned to Darcy.

"You." She said apologetically. "Aren't you Catherine de Bourgh's nephew?"

"I am."

"Mr. Darcy!" a nasally male voice called to him.

"I'm so sorry." Was all Jane had time to say before William Collins was upon them.

As he spaced off what the toad went on about he thanked Charles soooo much for having the party.

"Blah, blah, blah, the Good Lord, yadda, yadda, yadda, Nobel patroness." _What the fuck?_ Was Darcy's thought, "Lady Cat" _Oh, Cat's found someone to fluff her feathers – I knew there were multiple reasons why I hated her._ He continued to space off the simpering yes man until Elizabeth walked over.

"Cousin Elizabeth would you do me the honor of dancing?" Collins said bowing formally to her. She blanched and her dark eyes beseeched him for help.

"I would really love to but, uh…" She began.

"I've filled her dance card." Darcy finished for her hurriedly before rushing off to the other side of the room.

"Thank you." Elizabeth said.

"Don't thank me yet – we have to dance together now." Darcy said lightly. Inside he was more than ready to but he did have his pride.

"I see your evil plan, save me only to crush my feet. Well, right now, I could care less. In fact I would rather find my tongue stapled to a wall than dance with the 'todget'." Elizabeth said.

"Well then shall we dance?" Darcy asked offering her his arm humorously.

"Collins is watching – we shall." _Great she's only dancing with me because she wants to avoid the 'todget'. But she's dancing with ME. I've wanted this since, well, since I said she was a hippie and turned her down. Damn that came back to bite me in the ass. _Darcy thought as they took their positions on the floor.

_What is this feeling? So sudden and new? felt it the moment I laid eyes on you: My pulse is rushing: My head is reeling: My face is flushing: What is this feeling? Fervid as a flame, Does it have a name? Yes! Loathing Unadulterated loathing._

Darcy looked down at her.

"How do we dance to this?" he asked.

"Dunno – modified tango. Modified waltz. Maybe a tantz?" Elizabeth replied.

"You lead." And she did. _How fitting this song. _Elizabeth thought _It perfectly describes my feelings for you Will Darcy – Loathing, Unadulterated loathing. Even if George is lies and half truths I will still hate you. _

"You're not wearing your glasses." Darcy observed after some silence.

"I wear contacts mainly – but saw (no pun intended) no reason to wear them at the lake. I can't swim in them. Do you always talk when dancing?"

"Beats staring down the other couples; I did enough of that at prom." Elizabeth smiled and agreed. When the music changed it was both a blessing and a curse. She was away from Collins for another song and she didn't have to try and lead Darcy anymore. However, she recognized the song; Strauss' "Emperor Waltz". Eleven minutes of Darcy and dancing. She wasn't entirely comfortable with him in her sanctuary. However she saw Collins again and thanked God for the long song.

"Do you know how to Viennese Waltz?" Elizabeth asked switching body positions.

"Yes. Shall I lead?" it was a rhetorical question of course. He began the waltz; she was surprised at how well he led her. He was over a foot taller than she was.

"You dance well, where did you learn?" she asked looking up at him.

"My sister made me take lessons with her for years. You?" he was holding her eyes.

"My love affair with dance started when I was two, I think. You sister, is she short?"

"Average. Why?" he released her eyes, but only for a moment.

"It takes different training to lead a short partner. You led me very well." Elizabeth said. He was gazing into her eyes again.

"Collins will think we're lovers if you don't cut that out." She said.

"What?"

"My eyes – this is getting to be a cheesy romance novel." Darcy blushed.

"I was trying to see your contacts." He admitted. _Okay… that's weird. _

"My pulps/ eye color what-chama-call-its. Are really big – like freakishly big. I always wanted color contacts but they could impair my sight." Elizabeth said it was her turn to blush – she didn't know why. Her whole body was warm. Darcy could feel it through her artsy self designed green top. They were silent for a time before Elizabeth spoke again.

"Your sister is at Julliard. Who is your alma mater?"

"Harvard. That's where I met Charles – we were roommates." Elizabeth nodded and smiled faintly her off – white teeth accented by her very red lips.

"I suppose you already knew that?" she nodded.

"What ever Charles told you about those years is a lie." Darcy said.

"Charles hasn't told me a thing. Although I will have to ask him now. No, George told me about Harvard." She felt him tense. _Good. Squirm, bitch, squirm. _She thought.

"Ah. You've talked to him I take it." She nodded. "I don't know what he told you but I suggest that you keep a salt shaker handy in the future." He said, she nodded again.

"We've run out of topics." He commented after a silence.

"The song's only got three more minutes tops so don't worry." Elizabeth said. "Then we can separate and both avoid my family.

"How do you know there's only three minutes left?" Darcy asked.

"I studied a lot of music in college." She said.

"Music major from where?" He asked.

"I have a B.F.A. in Dance actually, from the TISH School of the arts." She said. _No wonder she can dance. _Was all he could think. _Prolific. _

"That why you want Danni to be a TISHie?" he inquired.

"Yes. She's extremely talented – gifted beyond her years. If she doesn't get big I'd be very much surprised."

"So where do you dance?"

"I was wrong. The song ends now." She was right of course but the abruptness was shocking. She hurried over to two men talking and drinking in the corner and he left the floor in the other direction. _What did I say? _

* * *

"I saw you cozy with Darcy his good looks win you over?" Galen Jennings teased her. Gaye was her best friend in the world (well, along with Jane and Lottie of course). They had danced together and lived together for a long time.

"I was actually avoiding the todget – I went with the lesser of the two evils."

"Ah, the todget – I've yet to have the pleasure." Jessie said smiling over the rim of his bourbon glass.

"He's here, and he'll find you – you sinner, just wait." The threesome laughed.

"Now back to a more pleasurable topic your Will Darcy. Jessie wouldn't you agree that he's hott. Sorry honey, but if he didn't like girls I would like him VERY much." Gaye said jesting with Jessie, who retaliated with,

"Be careful dear, I live Joanne's part."

"Okay, Joanne, Maureen cut it out. He's not my Will Darcy. Can we discuss another guy please?" As they began to compare Colin Firth to Matthew MacFadyen Charlotte walked over with the todget in toe. She couldn't shake him. The phrase 'total hotty' gave her a way to escape.

"I don't get you guys. Is that all you do, you just sit around and talk about guys?

"Either that or we talk about guys." Elizabeth replied smirking.

"Do you ever talk abut girls?" Collins asked hoping they talked about men they held in high esteem, like Jesus. Jessie and Gaye looked at each other and then at him and shook their heads.

"I only like girls sometimes." Elizabeth said smiling and licking her lips suggestively. Collins set a new land speed record in his attempt to get away from them. The group howled with laughter.

"That was terrible Benn." Charlotte said. "He just needs a hug."

"Then how come you didn't give him one?" Elizabeth retorted.

"I ain't got nobody, and no body cares for me Yakka tak taa yakka tak ta ha!" was Charlotte's reply.

* * *

Excerpt from William Johannes Collins' Journal

Page

I am far too flustered to number pages right now or even to care. I'm proposing to Cousin Elizabeth tomorrow. She needs not just salvation, but an **_exorcism_**. Her conduct tonight was so brazen! Her shirt was thin and showed enough cleavage to get less pure men (i.e. someone other than me) hot under the collar. And her pants were tight leather. I will reform this whore. She has entrapped Lady Cat's nephew, he's to marry Anne de Bourgh yet he danced with Elizabeth AND let her led him. She has worked he vixen tricks on him to be sure. Tomorrow she will be saved in marrying me she will never be with any other men **_or women_** except God ever again. Lady Cat will be most helpful in the reprogramming and very proud of the result.

* * *

**From the PDA of C.R. Bingley III**

**I think the night was a success. Jane and I were together all night. To actually have her body in my house makes it easier to picture her as my wife. She is an angel. Darcy too I believe has found his own angel. He and Elizabeth danced together. Jane said that dancing is more intimate than sex for Lizzy. And Darcy gazed into her eyes. I hate to sound like a bodice ripper but it was so. I haven't seen that much depth of emotion since Janie and mine's pictures were developed. God I love her! I LOVE JANE BENNET! Jane Bingley – how heavenly that sounds.**

* * *

**From the PDA of F. Darcy  
Bed! Bed! I couldn't go to bed! My head's too light to try to set it down! Sleep! Sleep! I couldn't sleep tonight. Not for all the jewels in the crown! I could have danced all night! I could have danced all night! And still have begged for more.  
I could have spread my wings and done a thousand things I've never done before.  
I'll never know what made it so exciting; why all at once my heart took flight. I only know when he began to dance with me I could have danced, danced, danced all night! I could have danced all night! I could have danced all night! And still have begged for more. I could have spread my wings and done a thousand things I've never done before. I'll never know what made it so exciting. Why all at once my heart took flight. I only know when he began to dance with me. I could have danced, danced danced all night! I could have danced all night, I could have danced all night. And still have begged for more. I could have spread my wings, and done a thousand things I've never done before. I'll never know what made it so exciting.  
Why all at once my heart took flight. I only know when he Began to dance with me I could have danced, danced, danced All night! I love Elizabeth Bennet. I hate George Wickham. I hate my Aunt and her bitch. I love Elizabeth. And in two days I'm leaving here, back to New York. Maybe I'll stop loving her, the thought pains me now but it's probably for the best. She doesn't like me; I can see it in her eyes. She doesn't even like me as a friend. If she did she wouldn't have run when I asked about her dancing. It's for the best. It's not true love, if she doesn't love you. And true love is the only love you need. New York shall be welcome. Speaking of true love, Jane is too reserved. I watched them all night. Charles is ready to marry her; Jane is barely in boyfriend/ girlfriend mode. And she's so nice; she might marry him just to make him happy. Toxic niceness. I hope that doesn't happen, maybe I should talk to him.**

* * *

_A/N Thank you to all who have read this story thus far, and an even bigger thank you to thoes of you who have reviewed, and those who will review shortly after reading this._

Anna; liked it, loved it! Please write more soon please. and somebody kill off caroline, for god's sake! _Amen!_

a; danni is a great character, "i like my coffee like i like my men; hot, black, and strong"! ) brilliant chapter, my favourite part has to be when caroline said CHOPin. i was laughing so hard my sister was giving me this funny looks. anyways, please update soon, i cant wait! _I heart Danni too, she was fun to write, and yay for laughing so hard at writen text as well as understanding that he isn't CHOPin with the violins. (I've had 'friends' ask about that)_

Happily Depressed; Gah! I love you. That was pretty much awesome. I'm kind of stuck on what to do for my story right now, but I'm working on it. Update soon!

Happily Depressed; I love this story beyond belief. It is awesome. LOVE that Elizabeth dances. LOVE that Darcy's SN is KnightsaysNi. LOVE the whole concept. Continue!_ I love you too Happy! And think that people should see her profile and read her stuff, hang on through the writer's block, I promise it'll get better!_

a; wow! i just read this, and i think it was great. lizzy is perfect, you transfered her into modern age very well, and she still stayed JAs elizabeth, darcy too. oh, and i loved how you insert those IM coversations, the best one was darcy and georgianas. i only didnt understand who is danni? at first i thought she was elizabeth, and then she said she was fourteen, so i was a bit baffled. and that song you used- hello, i love you by doors- thats my fovourite song. PlEaSe UpDaTe, i cant wait to read more _Thank you_

_Thank you all who reviewed, you are a great thing for my ego, I've been glowing ever since the first review. And I promise to read and review your stuff if you do mine. Thanks again! _

_BobbiG;)_


	7. You Might be a Redneck if

Chapter Seven; You Might Be a Redneck If…

I'll call you, cause you called me. This is Jane's cell phone - y. So leave your  
name and number at the tone. Sorry that I'm not at home. Beep

_Hey Jane, this is Charles. My number is 555-4582. Darcy and I were thinking about going down to the Lodge and playing some pool, wanted to know if you and Lizzy wanted to join us. Love you._

Thank you for calling Santa's workshop. Santa can't come to the phone right now, and the elves are out back barbecuing Blitzen. After the tone, please leave your Christmas list, and maybe we'll get back to you!

_Lizzy! That's not very nice! Any way Charles called. Wanna play pool – of course you do. I'll meet you at the lodge. You call Charles; his number is 712 – 555-4582. Thanks! Love you. Oh, and I want a pony_

It's the Bingley's answering machine speaking – They aren't here. If you want to reach Charles call 904 – 353 - 1353. If you want to call Caroline call 555 – 3713. If you want to call Dick and Lou call 555 – 4582. If you want to call Darcy call 555 – 3542. It spells out I asshole.1

Shut up.

Just remember I asshole. If you want any of this repeated hang up and call again.

_Telephone Tag! You're it!_

Thanks for calling Dial-An-Asshole. Right now, all our assholes are busy. After the tone, leave your name and number, and we'll have an asshole return your call as soon as possible.

_Telly tag – _

"Hello?" Darcy said picking up his cell phone, Lizzy was surprised and paused.

"Hello?"

"Nice message. 90 I asshole eh?" Lizzy said over the phone, it made her voice lower and huskier.

"What do you think Charles and I do on Fridays? Something constructive?" He replied her wonderful laughter filled his ear.

"Janie and I are at the Lodge – gunna order food. Any requests?"

"We'll trust you. Charles and I'll finish up our – uh walk." _Okay fist fight _"and see you in a few." With that they hung up. Darcy turned to a roughed up Charles and said,

"You look like shit."

"I wouldn't have if you'd just have admitted that you love Elizabeth. And you want a double wedding with me and Jane and a picket fence that looks like Nancy Caragain's teeth and 2.5 kids and –"

"Enough. We really should get cleaned up." Darcy said. _Don't listen to him – even if the ideas are good. No! Stay the course. _

Charles and Darcy entered the lodge to find Jane and Elizabeth already playing. Jane greeted Charles with a kiss; Elizabeth greeted Darcy with a cue.

"I'm solids, but Janie and I will team on stripes." Elizabeth said gesturing to the table. There was the lone five ball for solids, and five striped balls. "I wouldn't do that to you." Elizabeth continued, Darcy chuckled.

"You go ahead." He said, "Catch up."

"It's on." Elizabeth said smiling at him. Jane and Charles were still 'greeting' each other. Elizabeth just rolled her eyes and informed him that the twelve ball was going into the corner pocket. He rolled his eyes, she was going to have to not only bank the shot but do it in a combination as well. She did, with a satisfying click the striped purple ball landed in the pocket.

"Nine ball in the side pocket." She ran the table until they were equal.

"You're right, it is on." Darcy said and after he hit Charles with his cue he began his shot.

"You two needed air." He said.

"Or a room. I woulda said a room."

Elizabeth won the first game with a remarkable English cut.

"I think you're a hustler." Darcy joked with her after she offered to play cut throat as the next game.

"What do you think I do on my Fridays? Something constructive?" Elizabeth replied.

"There aren't enough balls." Jane observed.

"Elizabeth gets less." Darcy said.

"It still won't work." Charles said. "Doing the math; with factor of our handicaps, Jane and I should have four balls. That leaves six so A) Darcy you get four and Elizabeth two or B) both of you get three."

"I like B." Elizabeth said.

"Afraid?" Darcy asked her, even if he loved this woman – which he did, he still was competitive as ever.

"Of you? Never." Elizabeth responded. "Know what Chucky me boy I think I will go with that two ball idea, just to show mister big shot how it's done." Elizabeth said flipping her hair over her shoulder and racking the balls. Everyone got their numbers and Elizabeth started the game with a nice run. She knocked off two of everyone's.

"Now we're even." She said after her run was through. Darcy was about to say that it wasn't going to be for long but a young woman entered the pub.

"Lizzy!" She called.

"Mary!" Elizabeth replied rushing to greet her. As they approached together he could look at her better. This Mary looked a lot like Elizabeth, but her features lacked Lizzy's playfulness.

"Okay, here's the run down. I case you've forgotten that's your sister. Then that's Charles and that's Darcy. And if you actually came home when you're supposed to you would know all these people better than you do." Elizabeth said pointing to each person in turn. _So this is the other Bennet girl, wait aren't there two more?_ Darcy thought.

"I know Lizzy, I know, Daddy already gave me the what for about not being home when you were. But I had to be at school – I made it into the all state brain bowl team!" Mary said, both sisters rushed her all over again and both men clapped impressed.

"I'll forgive you, but you do know I go back soon?" Lizzy said. Conversation would've ensued but soon the polyphonic ring of Giacomo Puccini's la Boheme Che gelida manina played. Mary shyly picked up.

"Hello mama." She said. "Yes, mama, I found her. Yes, mama, I'll send her." There was a very mundane strain in her voice as she spoke to their mother. That instantly left when she hung up.

"Lizzy, that cousin of yours the one who resembles a toad, has requested a private audience with you. Whatever that means in this day and age. I was sent to retrieve you. Which in mother's eyes I have done poorly because you are still here. He's at home." Mary said, chocking a bit on the word 'home.'

"Hey, that todget is also your cousin, my dear sister." Elizabeth said. "I'll go to this shin dig, just to see what the hell it's all about. But you gotta win the game of cut throat for me."

"How do I do that?" Mary asked. She may have Elizabeth's blood and Elizabeth's looks but she did not have Elizabeth's skills.

"Well, it's Darcy's turn now, and if he gets any where near my two balls, fourteen and fifteen, you distract him, screw up his shot." Elizabeth said wrapping her arm around her sister's shoulders and waved a hand at the table.

"Should I ask how?" Was Mary's slightly pained question.

"Well you could flash the twins – he is a man after all." Elizabeth said poking her sister's left breast, Mary flinched and blushed. "Or you could take out his knees; you know how to do that, right?"

"You've taught me well on that account." Mary said taking the cue stick from Elizabeth and holding it with uncertainty. "Now be gone with you – I don't want to listen to mama more than I have to."

It was only about five miles from Jane's apartment to the Bennet house and Elizabeth didn't really want to leave the one for the other; thus, opted to ride her bike. She arrived at her childhood home fifteen minutes later, at about five o'clock. She was met by her mother; a woman of about fifty something or other who could pass quite well as a ginger cat. Especially since she still dyed her hair red even though it had been truly grey since her eldest was in high school.

"Elizabeth, about time you showed up! What kept you?" her mother said – screeched rather as she pulled her daughter inside. "Poor William has been waiting some time for you. He's in the living room." And with that Elizabeth was thrown into the room in question and locked in. Collins who had been sitting on the sofa stood as she 'entered' and said.

"Dear cousin Elizabeth, won't you sit down?" Elizabeth plopped down on the piano bench with little ceremony. The room was dark as it always was and hot. It would kill her mother to open a window, she was sure of it. "Now my dear, my reasons for marrying are thus; one I believe that I as a pastor should set a good Christian example of matrimony. Two, I believe that it would make me very happy. But third is the major reason for my quest for a wife, Lady Cat has told me on several occasions that I need a wife and she would be most pleased if I found one. I always try to please such a noble woman if it is with in my power. And marriage is something very much within my power. It is within my power to provide her someone who isn't too lively and opinionated. Someone who will fulfill Ephesians 5:22- 5:24. "Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, and Christ also is the head of the assembly, being himself the savior of the body. But as the assembly is subject to Christ, so let the wives also be to their own husbands in everything." I was to pick a gentlewoman not to highly taught but not lowly fed either. And I was to purpose. I have now done everything I was asked to do by my patroness. Now will you do what I ask of you and become my wife? I will never again mention the fact your are merely from Iowa with no notable college to your name or good profession. You will never have to touch the bottle again and dancing with be willing given up I am sure. You can live with me in marriage and raise our children and be the proper woman, no longer have to live as you do." He probably would've gone on but Elizabeth couldn't take it any more.

"Before you name our children I would like to stop you. I suppose I should thank you for your 'kind' proposal but it wasn't so I won't. I do not wish to be your wife ever. You can do nothing to change my mind. Hell, you can't do a thing as it is. You even miss quoted the bible! Your profession!"

"What! When?" Collins exclaimed changing color.

"Ephesians does say all that stuff about submission but you interpreted it incorrectly. If you read the next lines down you would see that you are a chauvinistic asshole. "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the assembly, and gave himself up for it; that he might sanctify it, having cleansed it by the washing of water with the word, that he might present the assembly to himself gloriously, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. Even so ought husbands also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself." You will love your wife like God loves you thus a woman does not really submit at all. And what are you smoking that makes you think I am not lively and opinionated?" Elizabeth had jumped to her feet and was now squaring off with her cousin across the coffee table.

"I don't think you know who I am Elizabeth. I am here to save you. But also introduce you to a superior society that is far above this lowly pig infested state of inbreeding and stupidity!" Collins replied, his dander was up.

"Inbreeding! We're first cousins! Maryton's not THAT far south. The idea is nasty and probably not legal!" Elizabeth said.

"No wife of mine will speak to me like that." Collins said. Elizabeth laughed heartily. "How am I funny, like a clown? What is so funny about me? What the FUCK is so funny about me? Tell me. Tell me what's funny."

"You are so right no wife of yours will speak to you in such a way because I am not nor will ever be your wife. I believe my _dear_ cousin William that _you _do not know who **_I_** am. My name is Elizabeth Luciana Bennet."

"Yes, yes I know that." Collins cut in extremely irritated.

"I attended school in Maryton and at age eighteen had not a penny to go to college on but through my own achievements with not a fuck from anyone else got myself a full ride scholarship to one of the most prestigious dance schools in the states if not the world! I am a TISHie! I attended NYU and danced! Hell I danced my way into the persona of Luciana Keene – I am a world fucking famous ballerina who is jousted over constantly to be in productions. I'm getting a quarter of a million dollars just for auditioning for Meg Girty on Broadway. I receive top billing in everything I touch. I don't need you I am happy and can support my own ass better than you ever could or would. I will not stop dancing even if God himself commands me to!" Elizabeth exclaimed and then turned to open the door, it remained locked. She could hear her mother on the other side of it screaming at her,

"You marry that man young lady! You marry that man, you little bitch!" Elizabeth cried out in anguish and exhaustion, bearing her soul in an almost homicidal rage was tiresome. She turned to the staircase and sprinted up it she could hear Collins after her but she was too quick and locked the door to the upstairs bedroom. _Fuck, now what do I do? _Elizabeth asked herself as she paced around what used to be the room she and Jane shared. _Ah ha! I'll just climb out the window. _Elizabeth decided after a blessedly short time she could here her mother digging around for her room keys. Elizabeth sprang into action and pushed her bookcase out from under the window and put it in front of the door. She then tried to open the widow over the roof. It was painted shut. Elizabeth put all her force into the upward motion or opening the pane and it did eventually creek open just enough for her to shimmy out of the room and on to the roof only sustaining a few sort of bleeding scratches to her stomach and back. Thankfully her father had never gotten around to trimming the oak that was by the house a sturdy looking branch was very close to the roof and with a miracle of a jump Lizzy found herself in the tree. _If only this had happened on prom night._ Elizabeth reflected thinking about how she broke twelve bones on her junior prom night. She scampered down the tree like a cat and hopped to the ground the leap gave her enough momentum and she ran to the pull barn some thirty yards away. Her beloved father was there tinkering with the lawnmower.

"Daddy I'm talking the Baby Doll – you never saw me. Don't worry about the car I will call Kink when I can. I love you." She said hopping into her father's pale blue vintage mustang. She found the keys and peeled out all before Tomas Bennet could mumble an 'mmmkay.'

Fitzwilliam, Charles and Dick all sat around the large screen TV in the living room watching a Harvard football pick up game. It was on an obscure ESPEN channel at an odd hour (9:30) but they didn't care, Harvard was winning. The crimson brothers (as they called themselves) couldn't be happier. He hadn't felt this good since he kicked Elizabeth's ass at pool. Okay it was an Elizabeth stand in but he still schooled her. _Damn, now you'll never focus on the game._ He had done it, he had thought of her. He was now doomed. Thankfully everyone's concentration was broken with the shrill ring of the telephone. Charles fumbled around the couch for it and raised it to his ear as he pressed mute on the television.

"'Lo" he said into the receiver. Jane was on the other end and sounded worried.

"Charles, is Lizzy with you?" Jane asked.

"Nope." Charles said happily, number twenty five had just scored a touchdown.

"Fuck." Charles sat bolt up right and tensed, something was really wrong. He could her it in Janie's voice she was upset, raw, and horse. And she never really swore.

"What's wrong?" He asked focusing all his attention on his love, Darcy and Dick exchanged looks of inquiry.

"Elizabeth isn't back yet. She hasn't called. She's not with you, or at the Lodge, or with any of the gang. I can't find her." Jane said.

"What happened?" Charles asked.

"I don't know!" Jane said, Good Lord she was crying. "I know nothing after she left. Mom called me and Mary. Collins purposed to her and she locked herself in her room, next thing we know the window's open and she's gone. I know she took the Baby Doll but I don't know where she is." Charles stood up.

"I'll be right over love and I'll bring help. We'll find her. I promise." And with that he hung up. Darcy had jumped up at the phrase 'bring help'

"What is it Charles? What's going on?" He asked.

"Elizabeth's AWAL, MIA, vanished and Jane has no idea about anything. She's really worried."

"Well when are we going?" Darcy exclaimed. There was a screech and Caroline 'fell'.

"Oh help, I need a doctor!" She cried looking at Darcy the whole time. Darcy didn't notice, Elizabeth was missing - Caroline be damned. Dick understood and told him to go and find Lizzy; he'd take care of his sister – in – law. Darcy was eternally grateful as he and Charles rushed to the truck.

Jane met them at the door looking extremely distressed but none the less gorgeous. Charles immediately swept her up into his arms and cuddled her close leading the way to the couch.

"I know I'm over reacting but I'm so worried. Last time Lizzy jumped off the roof she broke a lot of bones – and when that she wasn't distressed. I have no idea where she is." Jane said into Charles' shoulder.

"Well who's looking for her?" Darcy asked.

"Dad and Mary are at the pond, the Bill and Eileen are all over the Lodge, Charlotte is talking to Collins, Gaye and Jessie are at the school, Matt and Meg the Cemetery." Jane rattled off.

"Where should I look?" Darcy asked desperate to be of service.

"There is one other place. I'm not sure if she'd go back, it's not as safe as it used to be…"

"Where? What; I'll search it." If Charles and Jane hadn't been so distressed they would've speculated about how deeply in love Darcy was.

"The old school house. It's outside of the next town over – Tabor. She used to go there with the gang when they could drive. But it's so abandoned now – unsafe." Darcy gulped.

"Give me directions, I'll check it. You two stay here." He said. Jane did and he was on his way in no time.

The old school house was an eerie sight indeed in the full moon. It was at least three stories and left for a very long time. The tuck pointing was crumbling and Darcy understood why Jane said it was unsafe. He parked the truck and locked it before approaching the Tabor school house with some trepidation; Iowa was the meth capital of the world and labs were always in secluded and abandoned buildings. Inside he decide that not even an addict wanted to be there, there wasn't much of a roof, the moon shown through the ceilings from floors above illuminating better than any flashlight he held.

"Lizzy!" He called, "Lizzy!" His voice brought down dust and he swore he could hear bats screech replies. There was no reply. He walked for a little bit more, out of sick curiosity really. The entire building was gutted long ago there were plants in what were once rooms and the interior walls were only half standing. It was through one that he saw her as he was about to go. She was dancing again, her movements like she was trying to purge herself of whatever emotion she was feeling. Standing on barefoot tip – toes, _Georgiana called it demi-point, _she brought her other leg up and with her arms created a circle so she looked sort of like a lollipop, not to trivialize the flexibility but she did. Then with a snap she was out of position and off in a leap. She dove and rolled, the music in her head must've changed. She continued to dance, her body fluid and boundless. He watched her perform painful looking maneuvers only hoping she limbered up before any of this. She was completely out of touch with reality. _How am I supposed to bring her back to know?_ He wondered. However his answer soon came, she jumped very close to him and he caught her, one hand on her triceps on hand supporting her thigh. Her eyes snapped open and the spell was broken. He put her down awkwardly.

"Did your sister make you take ballet lessons as well?" She asked turning to him.

"Not really, no. She took them but I never did." He replied.

"How many years?" Elizabeth asked.

"Five, she quit when the rest of her class moved to point work, her ankles weren't up to it." He said.

"Pity, I always loved point work. But your sister has moved on to bigger and better things, has she not?"

"I'm not here to talk about Georgiana, as much as I love to, I'm here because of your sister. You're killing Jane with worry right now." He said. Elizabeth showed no emotion.

"She needn't be. I would've called when I returned to Kink's. I couldn't go back there or 'home' if you paid me." She was hollow inside.

"Is that where you left the car? I didn't see one when I pulled up." Elizabeth nodded then shivered. She was only wearing a light tunic and a pair of cut offs. The weather had gotten colder and Fitzwilliam now understood why Jeff Foxworthy described an Iowan as 'perfectly okay with switching from A/C to heat in the same day'.

"Come on Bennet, let's get you – let's get you where ever you're going." Darcy said wrapping his arm around her. They exited the building and found a local policeman standing by Charles' truck; he didn't really look at them as he started to speak,

"You realize this property is— oh, hi, Beth." The officer recognized Elizabeth and tipped his hat. The man was about Darcy's age and smiled at them.

"Evening Wal." Elizabeth said.

"You good Beth? I just met Galen and his boyfriend up to the cemetery, said they were looking for you?"

"Yha, Walter, I'm fine." She replied Walter looked like he was waiting for an explanation for her absents. "Just showing William here the reason why the country is better than any city." She said.

"Gottcha. So you two…" he pointed between them.

"Nobody knows Wal, and its gunna stay that way, right?" Elizabeth's answer was directed towards the officer but she was looking at Darcy the whole time. There was a look in her eyes that inspired his more theatrical side he drew her closer and said softly,

"Not a soul."

"Okay then!" was all Walter said as he made a mad dash to leave them, over the roar of his engine he said something about saying hello to everyone but peeled out before that could be confirmed or deigned. Darcy wanted to kiss her terribly but Elizabeth was laughing too hard for that.

"That, William Darcy, was mean. Poor Wal." She said through giggles.

"What?" he said leading her toward the Ford.

"We just reminded him of his sexless existence, and we're **_not_** hitting it." She said pulling herself into the cab. HE hopped into the driver's seat, but didn't start the engine.

"Will there be backlash?" he asked. As much as it would please him, he was sure it wouldn't please her.

"He knows better. Don't worry 'bout it. Besides we'll be gone soon." She replied.

"We?"

"Yes – aren't you leaving tomorrow?"

"Yha, but I'm not a 'we'."

"You and I are a 'we'." After she said that the multiple meanings of what she said hit them both. "That's not what I mean William – GaH! That name, that name. How I HATE that name! Oh – sorry Will." She was having an emotional battle in her head.

"S'okay. My name's not William." He said.

"Really? What is it then?" she inquired.

"Fitzwilliam…No laughing." Perhaps his opening up would educe her to open up.

"I'm not; I like Fitzwilliam much better than William." Darcy started the truck and got back on the highway.

"Jane is really worried about you, she'll be glad to have you home."

"Don't take me back there. He's there." She said, there was something in her voice, a mixture of anger and sadness and anger.

"Well where should I take you?" he asked.

"Kink's. I'd prefer to go to him." Elizabeth looked out the window and re rest of the drive back to Maryton's was silent. On the edge of town he finally spoke.

"Where to?" Elizabeth gave him perfect directions in a detached manor, one she had had all drive. They stopped in front of a modest split level house. An older man in overalls was on the front porch with the two men that she had been talking to at Charles' party. One he recognized as her dance partner from before. He was tall, dark haired, obviously the old man's son, and he was wearing a fitted tee shirt. Darcy couldn't read it but it had the rainbow on it. The other man was also dark and tall, not a relation of the other two. He was dressed more conservatively.

"Thank you Fitzwilliam. I'll call Janie sometime soon." She said and rushed out of the cab and into the house before he could reply. So with a sigh he waved at the men and returned to Charles and Jane.

He didn't knock because the door was ajar. He instantly regretted the decision. He walked in, turned on his heel and walked out. Charles could just spend the night. As Fitzwilliam headed back to Neatherfield he thought to himself,

"Thank God I'm going home tomorrow."

1 Not really, and hopefully I didn't get any real numbers, like the first time I posted this. Thanks for the heads up people!

60


	8. White Wedding

Chapter Eight; White Wedding

* * *

Elizabeth slept in the guest bedroom at Kink's and left as scheduled from the Omaha airport with the proper send off like the night before never happened. Elizabeth was glad that no one brought it up she was still emotionally hollow from the experience and its aftermath. As Kink put it, the whole thing had knocked off scabs on old wounds. Jane and Elizabeth tearfully embraced at the drop off for Elizabeth's flight.

"Whattya gunna do for fun now that I'm gone?" Elizabeth asked jokingly of her friends.

"Plan what we're gunna do next time you're in town/ finally plan that trip to see you/ I have no idea." Meg said also in tears.

"Everything's going to be real quite around here, you're leaving, the todget is leaving tomorrow and Darcy already left." Matt observed, Elizabeth and he embraced as she replied,

"You'll only have Jessie and Gaye to make fun of."

* * *

Elizabeth's flight was as pleasant as expected. With every mile put between her and Iowa she felt her emotional mess slowly unknot. And by the time the wheels of the plane touched down Elizabeth was almost better. The distress she felt was now small enough that she could lock it up in a corner of her mind and meet New York City completely normal.

"LUCI!" a voice called out to her as she entered the commons. Elizabeth embraced the group that welcomed her home.

* * *

Buzzzz! Buzzt! Elizabeth had been home for about two weeks, long enough for her to hunt and gather food and dive back into work. She wasn't performing in the current or next show that was rehearsing, but she still attended rehearsal everyday to get back into shape.

"Yellow?" Elizabeth said into her PA.

"Benn?" the fuzzy voice of Lottie came through the speaker.

"Ohmigod!" Elizabeth exclaimed buzzing her best friend up to her sixth floor studio.

"What are you doing here?" Elizabeth asked after they embraced and finished squealing.

"I wanted to surprise you, did it work?"

"Oh, Lottie... If I woke up tomorrow with my head stapled to the floor, I wouldn't be more surprised than I am now." The women laughed and settled themselves on the futon.

"So this is New York." Charlotte observed.

"If you wouldda called me…" Elizabeth trailed off; she noticed Charlotte's hand, more specifically the huge gaudy diamond and gold monstrosity taking over her ring finger.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?" Elizabeth exclaimed grabbing her best friend's had and staring at the jewel.

"Oh, that."

"Yes **_that_**!"

"I'm getting married!" Charlotte cried throwing her arms around her friend.

"I see that," Elizabeth said after the hug. "But to who?"

"Collins."

"WHAT!"

"Collins purposed to me and I accepted." Charlotte said confused by Elizabeth's reaction.

"Why?" Was all the response she got.

"Why should you be surprised, my dear Eliza? Do you think it incredible that Collins should be able to procure any woman's good opinion, because he was not so happy as to succeed with you?" Charlotte paused and pushed Elizabeth's jaw closed.

"I see what you are feeling; you must be surprised, so lately Collins was wishing to marry you. But look at Matthew Broderick, he was engaged twice before Sarah Jessica Parker."

"Charlotte…"

"I hope in time you'll understand my decision. I was never a romantic, you planed your dream wedding, I planned my dream business. I've never been into prince charming and weddings, so as long as I do eventually walk down the aisle I don't much care. He isn't so bad really, not to mention I remember a little speech you gave about taking a nerd and turning him into a butterfly."

"I'm still not comprehending. My brain no compute." Elizabeth said, Charlotte looked a bit sad but continued on.

"Lizzy, you went to college and then got the hell out of Iowa, now look at you, everything you wanted you've done. I have a MBA but am still bussing tables in noman's land. If I marry Liam I will be in Boston, I'll have a shot. I'm taking it." Charlotte said, Elizabeth knew she had a point, but still didn't agree.

"Everyone has somebody, if you marry Collins you'll live the rest of your life knowing that your husband is out there and you're not."

"Well his 'wife' can marry my 'husband' and it'll all be good." Charlotte said finger quoting 'wife' and 'husband'. Elizabeth shook her head and almost said something but Charlotte cut her off.

"I was left for another man, Elizabeth. And not just any other man, a trainer. A trainer named Dash. I was left for a punctuation mark. I just stopped carrying after that. When it comes to men they're either married or gay. And if they're not gay, they've just broken up with the most wonderful woman in the world, or they've just broken up with a bitch who looks exactly like me. They're in transition from a monogamous relationship and they need more space. Or they're tired of space, but they just can't commit. Or they want to commit, but they're afraid to get close. They want to get close; you don't want to get near them." Charlotte looked off at the floor as she said this, not seeing the array of emotions that Elizabeth's animated face bore.

"So you want to get near Collins? **_He_** falls into the category of people you can commit to? Lottie, Lottie, Lottie, your head's not on straight…"

"I'm looking for support Elizabeth! Your mother and sister are bitches from hell; M&M are disappointed in me so is Gaye and Jessie! I fly out here, so far away from my norm seeking support I don't need this! I'm going to marry him!" Tears welled in Charlotte's eyes.

"I'm sorry Lottie." Elizabeth said, instantly regretting her censure of her friend's decision, at least to her face. Elizabeth took Charlotte's wire framed glasses and set them on the coffee table and then embraced her soul sister letting her weep on her shoulder. After the sobs quieted Elizabeth wiped her friend's eyes and moved to her 'kitchen', really a corner of the room with a counter, fridge and stove. From a cabinet she pulled out a bottle of vodka and two shot glasses from a tourist store and her NYU days. After a health belt Elizabeth tried to be the perfect friend and asked,

"So… details."

"I want you to be my maid of honor." Charlotte said, pouring them each another shot.

"I would be honored Lottie. When is the wedding?"

"Two weeks." Elizabeth choked on the vodka and it threatened to come out her nose.

"Two weeks?" she repeated.

"Yep, the fifteenth. That's another reason why I'm here. I need wedding clothes and I need you there."

"Don't you want Meg and Eileen there with you?" Elizabeth asked.

"They will be there for the wedding, but neither is happy with me right now, I was hopping to get a better reception from you…"

"Lottie forgive me, please, I was surprised but I trust you above all else so I will try to be the best maid a bride could want."

"Thank you."

"We'll start tomorrow. Oh, oh, this means I get to go into all those fabulous and expensive wedding stores! This will totally rock; it'll be a total shopping Saturday." Charlotte agreed.

* * *

"What do you think?" Charlotte asked. She was standing on the pedestal of the ninth bridal boutique that morning.

"It's perfect, Charlotte, perfect." And it was. The dress was stunning and simple with an off the shoulders neckline, simple A frame design in an off white (it had some crazy French name but it was really just off white) colored satin that came to the floor.

"I love it. Oh, Benn, I can see why women go gaga over this wedding thing, I feel so beautiful." Lizzy shed a few tears and hugged her bride to be buddy.

They ate an early lunch at one of Noho's little bohemian cafés before beginning the quest for a bride's maids' dress. They were found after three tries around the city, but both Charlotte and Elizabeth were thankful for the search, it reaped great reward. Meg was pregnant and Elizabeth was petite thus they opted for an empire wasted gown with a scoop neckline. The top was short sleeved and velvet, the lower half was floor length satin. It was in a beautiful shade of garnet red that both girls fell in love with instantly.

* * *

Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

October 1st, 2005 9:51:09 EST

Feeling: Feelings, nothing more than feelings

Music: Lisa Carew; Jekyll and Hyde, Original Cast 1995

Lottie Lu, Can This Be You? What Kind of Man is This You've Taken?

Lisa Carew, Can this be you? What kind of man is this you've taken? Can you not see the kind of life that this would be? You are mistaken! Time to awaken before it's too late before you've forever determined your fate! Charlotte's making a mistake; she's agreed to marry the todget! She's resolute! She's having him! I helped her pick her wedding dress – more like funeral shroud. How strange this is! And for _this_ we are to be thankful. That they should marry, small as their change of happiness, and wretched as is his character, we are forced to rejoice! I can't believe I am to be a party to this – I'm the maid of honor. And yet I cannot for the life of me stand the groom. They're marrying in two weeks. She's staying with me till then. It doesn't feel right! It doesn't feel right! I have sympathy for her. Not only is she marrying the todget but mother has been an unholy bitch to every Lucas and Lydia is making everyone's life hell. I just cannot wrap my head around it! I shall just act like she was marrying a man I approved of and treat it as such, from my gift to my time at her wedding. I can visualize people well, so Lottie in my mind shall be married to…to Sir Laurence Olivier. He's really really really really hott. Okay his personal life was a bit shotty, but still he was gorgeous!

* * *

The weeks before Charlotte's wedding ended and Elizabeth found herself in the line of bride's maids ready to walk Charlotte to her fate. Things hadn't gone smoothly by any stretch of the imagination. About a week before the day Charlotte had found Elizabeth's journal entry about her wedding. Naturally this distressed her.

"_Lizzy! How could you?" Charlotte exclaimed when Elizabeth returned from the theater one evening._

"_What?" Elizabeth asked trying to remember what she could've done._

"_My wedding! I honestly expected respect for this decision! I'm almost twenty seven, I was never pretty and I have found someone who could keep me content and you go on and on about how crazy I am! Don't you trust me! I trusted you!"_

The girls hadn't spoken much since the fight. And of course they couldn't now. Elizabeth approached the door of the Marriott ball room where the Lucas – Collins wedding was being held and took the arm of the best man; apparently he was William's friend from college. The man was at least not greasy, other than that Elizabeth didn't know.

The ceremony was short and sweet to someone who didn't know the full story. Collins had cleaned up tolerably and the bride was utterly stunning. All the maids looked good and all agreed that they needed a stiff drink after the ceremony. Thankfully the reception held at a ball room promised a fully stocked bar.

* * *

The best man, Henry Stride was less greasy and more humorous than Collins was currently and after his heart felt toast to the couple Elizabeth was ready to do what had come to her on the wedding's eve. She was handed the microphone as promised and with a deep cleansing breath she began a different kind of cleansing.

"For those of you, who don't know who I am, my name is Elizabeth and I'm here to roast our dear Miss Charlotte Ann Lucas – oops! **_Mrs._** Charlotte Ann **_Collins_**. Stride did a grate job roasting the charming groom but he left the bride untouched, thus here I am with a microphone, your attention and some good 'references'. Back when we were at our craziest years (surprisingly its not this age) we promised to at every public event embarrass each other as much as possible. I remember my graduation and some photos that came to light in an enlarged way – never trust this woman with any photo that is remotely, let's go with interesting; I also remember my first stage performance and a 'little' sign of her love for all to see, by little I mean megaphone and a sign taller than I am. So here I am ready to make a speech about how lucky you are William." Elizabeth received some chuckles as she reached by her chair and retrieved her prop.

"I brought with me a prop because Lottie just loves them so. This is a bra." Elizabeth held it up and shook it slightly before turning to Collins and addressing him directly. "It's the one I got Lot for her wedding night – so it's a preview of coming attractions as well as my visual aid. Charlotte is a lot like this bra. She's like the lace, sweet, provocative, delicate and feminine. But she is also like the sturdy straps and back of this thing, for all the pretty she is also practical and rational a good grounder. She's brought me down loads of times so trust me when I say she's the logical one. She even shares similar properties with the hooks in back. Bloody complicated and hard to get open if you don't try, but she keeps it all together. But above all the frills and dependency that make Lottie unique is the most important similarity between her and this piece of lingerie. The under wire. Sure every woman has complained about it, but every woman is thankful for it at the end of the day when her boobs don't hang low and wobble to and fro. Charlotte is the best support in the world. She's unwavering and uplifting. She keeps you on top and can make you perky again. Sure I've wanted to burn her a few times, just like a bra – these connections just keep popping out, uh, up. But in retrospect it was for the best. She is perfect for every woman, a necessity like air. I on the other hand am like crotch-less underwear – Sorry Collins, didn't get her that but I did look at them. Then I realized it was worthless, which is why it's like me. Crotch-less underwear is only good for one thing if that, a bra is universal. I am only really good for one thing – a bad example or I guess a good example of a bad thing, take your pick. But Charlotte is universal. You can use her to support you, you can use her to be logical and you can use her to be absolutely stunning. Like bra vs. stupid underwear or her vs. me - I'm stupid. She's smart. I am always wrong. She is always right. She's the best. I'm the worst. She's very good-looking. I'm not very attractive. And that's why I am sorry to see her go. Selfish as all this sounds I am sorry to give her up. But…" Elizabeth had been crying since her veiled apology to her friend, her voice was now cracking,

"I think about whom I'm losing her to, and he is far more in need and deserving of this miracle woman than I am. He needs a bra more than I do." The women embraced tearfully and people clapped. Some laughed but everyone with only one exception clapped. The exception was a stately woman in the corner who was very vexed and put out by everything. Her annoyance was heightened by her nephew and escort's amusement and joy at the brazen bride's maid's speech. Darcy on the other hand enjoyed it very much, not just because it was so embarrassing or so heartfelt, but because it was Elizabeth telling it.

* * *

Later after some pot shots from the couple themselves at their wedding party and food all around the floor was opened up for dancing. Charlotte and Collins shared their first dance to Jekyll and Hyde's 'Take me as I am', and Charlotte danced with her father to the tune of the same name. Elizabeth stood out the dancing for a few songs nursing a gin, straight up; she didn't even notice that there was anyone beside her until Darcy offered her a flute of Champagne.

"Oh! Darcy! I didn't notice you at all!" Elizabeth said surprised looking up at Fitzwilliam Darcy, a man whom she never really wanted to see again. Even if he had been nice to her that one time.

"Not notice Fitzwilliam Darcy?" A voice behind Darcy screeched sounding vaguely like an older Caroline Bingley, that estimate turned out to be true as Darcy produced Lady Cat de Bourgh, the woman whom Collins had gone on and on and on about.

"Miss, I don't think you know who you are talking to, this is a man with more money to his name that you and the rest of the bridal party combined." Wha, wha, wha, wha, want wa wa. Was all Elizabeth heard after a while, she tuned back in when the old woman finished her speech by saying,

"It is he who shouldn't notice you at all." Darcy blushed as red as the gown Elizabeth was wearing, she just laughed.

"Champagne?" Darcy asked again trying to cover for his aunt.

"I'll stick with gin. Champagne is just ginger ale that knows somebody." Was Elizabeth's comment, obviously alluding to his aunt's 'connections' rant. He understood.

"Well, perhaps after you finish with your drink you'd dance with me?" Darcy asked as Elizabeth drained her glass. _Why the hell not? He can dance, and Gaye and Jessie are both busy._

"Whatever." Was Elizabeth's half hearted reply. Darcy took her hand with inner glee and led her to the floor. They got into a simple waltz position and began to dance.

"I'm sorry about her." He said, "She's old school about everything when it comes to names and who's who." He said dancing with her; she nodded slowly but in understanding. "And she's all on edge because she really doesn't associate with these types of people." He nodded towards Gaye and Jessie dancing and kissing as well as some other of Charlotte's friends.

"I see. She hates me because I'm from a working class family, have an artistic job, am brazen, and associate myself with hooligans." She said snappishly.

"She doesn't hate you. And where did you get the brazen thing?" He asked.

"Please, from the sounds of Stride Collins wasn't always such a prude, and since he worships your aunt I can assume that it's her influence that has driven him to his evil ways."

"That's not exactly fair. I wouldn't call you people hooligans or my aunt particularly prudish."

"Then what would you call us, and did you look at your aunt?"

"You decided on hooligans so let it be and I just thought her outfit was ugly."

"I'll agree on one point. And be kind and drop the other." They were silent for a moment before Darcy asked,

"I was surprised that you support Charlotte like you do, I thought you hated Collins." He said they were dancing by the couple that she had often run to in town.

"I will support Charlotte from now till eternity didn't you hear my speech."

"I did and I loved it. But don't you think it's all asinine? She's marrying the man you we're supposed to marry first." Elizabeth glared at him and stepped out of his arms,

"Hey, Darcy. Eat a bag of shit. You suck. Cutting in!" She directed the former to him and the latter to the boys as she took the place of the man who was leading, leaving him with the guy.

"Hi," the man said, "you must be Darcy. I'm Jessie." The guy said, Darcy remained in the lead and felt quite silly leaving when the guy danced so well, besides if this Jessie knew Elizabeth like he assumed he did he wanted some answers.

"What did I say to her?" Darcy asked.

"I don't know, but I do know what she said to you," then in a perfect imitation of her voice he quoted her back to him. "'Hey, Darcy. Eat a bag of shit. You suck.' Now that's pretty much to the point, not much gray area in that one. So whatever you said you really pissed her off."

"No, did I?" Darcy asked sarcastically as he watched Elizabeth and his dancing partner's partner.

"You know not a thing about her do you?" Jessie asked looking at him knowingly.

"What do you mean, what's there to know?" He replied.

"Exactly, you're receiving an education tonight, come to room 1213 tonight at the hotel next door and I'll explain."

* * *

Darcy looked at the door he was standing in front of at three am that night. The reception had wound down and he had time to change before he got a call from Jessie who had some how found him. He was serious about this Elizabeth thing. So here he was knocking on a strange gay man's door trying to find out about a very complex woman. The door opened and he was pulled inside by Jessie and his partner. Inside was also Matt Ethans who told him to

"Sit" like he was practicing at being a father. Darcy did as he was told and all three men stood for a moment with their arms crossed staring at him. He stared back.

"You don't know a damn about Benn do you?" Elizabeth's dance partner said.

"Enlighten me." The men exchanged looks that said, 'he asked for it.' Matt began.

"Elizabeth Luciana Bennet is the second daughter of five born to Tomas and Francis Bennet. Francis's first words about her second daughter was, "This was supposed to be a boy, what am I going to do with another girl, I already have Jane." That sort of set the tone for Lizzy didn't it?" Matthew paused and gave Darcy another hard look, Darcy didn't register anything yet. "Francis wanted to name the child Jonathina, because the boy's name was supposed to be John. Tomas put his foot down and named his daughter Elizabeth, after his mother, a woman Francis hates, and Luciana on of Tomas's favorite Shakespearean names. This is why Tomas is so close to Elizabeth, yet so far. He desperately loves that bitch of a wife, despite the fact she's a bitch. Elizabeth only had Tomas, but Francy presents a block. Thus Elizabeth grew up a touch detached. Francis wanted nothing to do with her so she didn't; she would only do the bare minimum and spent the rest of her time with Jane. Elizabeth was lonely and was pretty much raised by Tomas Bennet, and his friends, Bill Lucas, Kink Jennings and their wives Eileen and Marianna. It was hard for Elizabeth to comprehend her mother, and every step she's taken has been in an attempt to bring herself closer to the woman she loves, despite all this and the more to come." Matthew paused again and the dance partner took over,

"When Jane was five and Elizabeth three Francis enrolled Jane in dance lessons, Francis couldn't dump Elizabeth so she came along and watched to. Elizabeth wanted so much to be like her older sister, so in the corner she would practice what Jane would do. This continued for years, Francis said that Elizabeth wasn't pretty enough or girly enough to be in ballet but would take her to watch her pretty perfect sister. Elizabeth never let her mother know her sadness and Elizabeth would continue to practice off to the side of the room. Elizabeth was a natural at dancing she was far better than a majority of the learning class and the teachers would beg to Francis to enroll her second daughter. Francis never did. As they got older, Jane had no desire to dance but was forced to. Elizabeth wanted to dance so both girls appealed to their father and his friends, they hatched a plan. Jane would ride with her mother to dance, Elizabeth would ride with her father or some one else. The girls would meet in the bathroom, Elizabeth would wear Jane's stuff and go to class and Jane would go with who ever had brought her sister and they would spend time together. Elizabeth was an amazing student in not time she needed to be moved up. She was able to start taking point **_three years_** before anyone else her age. Even though that was fronded upon she was talented beyond her years. As they grew Francis got more and more catty to her second daughter, every time Elizabeth was victorious, Francy would rank aloud how much she loved her children, it would go: Jane, Lydia, Kitty, Mary, the dog, Elizabeth. Elizabeth suffered the verbal abuse by throwing herself into what she felt safe in, books and the theater, she danced, acted, costumed, make upped, worked back stage, and studied. She tried to win her mother's love. She graduated top of her class and could've gone any where." The man stopped, Darcy was now feeling something. _Good Lord, no wonder she was so against her family and so close to everyone else. And so touchy over any comment about her appearance or dance. _"But what she didn't know was that Francis enjoyed shopping for Jane and Lydia and would spend obscene amounts of money, money she would sometimes take out of Elizabeth's account. By the time Elizabeth graduated high school she had only seven hundred dollars to her name, she could go no where. The town wanted to drum Francis out of the country, Jane was mortified and paid her sister back, it badly affected Jane. I think during the rest of her college years she spoke to a shrink. Elizabeth refused the money saying that if her mother didn't see it fit to send her to college then she wouldn't go." _OH MY FUCKING GOD! _Darcy thought, the pieces were falling into place, everything was making sense now. Jessie began to speak; these men were approaching this like an intervention, each saying their two cents about the woman.

"The whole town called a meeting and they raised enough, more than enough money to send her to an audition for the TISCH School of the arts. Everyone knew that Elizabeth Bennet was something special when it came to dance, even NYU who snapped her up in a flash with a full ride scholarship. Elizabeth attended gratefully and got more than a BFA in Dance. She became a star. Her first ballet solo she received a five minute standing ovation. She was offered all sorts of positions and danced _during her school years_ for the New York Ballet Company. Her stage début was as the alternate for the star and woman who defined the character of the ballet Giselle. She would've out shone the woman if it wasn't for seniority. Critics loved her; she was getting no rest from them at NYU that was when her alter ego was born. Elizabeth would be Elizabeth at school and such but when she danced she would be her stage persona. It gave her peace." Jessie said. The men were winding down their confrontation, Darcy could tell, he was glad this was a sensory overload for him.

"Elizabeth is a star, she stars in ballet and has been on Broadway, she's been in the favor of the company for eight years." Matt said.

"Her mother doesn't know all of it, she knows that her daughter is living in Nolita New York and is a dancer, Francis doesn't approve." The dancer continued.

"And it's killing Benn inside. After you dropped her off at Dad's she had a break down. She was tried of her mother hating her and the world not knowing a damn thing. The girl's broken inside but also as tough as nails so be careful. And if you damage her further…" Jessie began and all three men finished with,

"We'll break you."

* * *

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**It's about five am and try as I might my insomnia that usually pledges me while I am in my aunt's house has only gotten worse since returning from my intervention about Elizabeth, for lack of a better descriptor. I'm losing the particulars of the story because I'm so fucking tired but my mind won't shut up. Everything's falling into place, why didn't I see it before? I always knew Elizabeth was amazing but what I've heard is just surreal. If I hadn't heard it from her friend's I wouldn't have believed it. I can't even chalk this up to good acting, she wasn't. I was just too blind to think about her being worth a damn. No wonder everyone talked about a company and good news! Why doesn't she talk about it more freely? But I see why she avoided her mother in any form at any time. And I see why she was so smart, cultured, beautiful, and bohemian. God, I still love her. The story has only made me want to rush in on a white stead and be her knight in shining armor. And I'm no real romantic. This is all so complicated. Will I never be free of this woman? There's too much in my head to do me any good and damn it, damn it, damn it, the feeling is only getting worse.**

* * *

_AN: Thanks for reading and reviewing. I'd also like to really thank GeeAMouse for the heads up on the fact that i originally posted really numbers in chapter seven. I hope all has been changed. but if heaven forbid it hasn't For the love of all things holy don't call them! Show maturity! that said, I feel better. Thanks again._


	9. La Vie Boheme

Chapter Nine; La Vie Boheme

* * *

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**Start work today. Time to get back to something I enjoy, too long I've been thinking about Elizabeth. I can't do anything and living in my head isn't helping, so now I welcome the theater as a diversion. Bimbos and gay men with injuries will keep my busy. The business is less than interesting but a delay, I was supposed to start the first of October but no dice. The people that run the place are very nice. I should be happy. Perhaps I will get her off my mind with all this work. Yet some how I doubt this.**

* * *

Darcy looked into his car's mirror and adjusted his collar. Georgiana had given him strict instructions as to how he was to dress and behave on his first day on the job. He was nervous but took a deep breath and stepped out towards the impressive Lady Austin theater home of her company. He entered the grand lobby and looked around; there was no one there and no handy sign that said, 'Yo, Darcy, this way to someone who knows anything.' Lacking a heavenly signal Darcy entered the auditorium and found the stage full of dancers stretching out and crew wandering about with an unknown purpose. He approached quietly and observed the dancers' warm ups. Off to one side was a strawberry blonde dancer doing one handed push ups while talking to a tall sandy haired man in business casual clothing. There was a dishwater blonde – brunette man talking to an older couple by the front of the stage. Behind them a couple kissed and a read head holding a bundle of fabric hit them with a belt. Behind and in between more people milled about and shouted random things to each other, it was very jovial atmosphere. At the other side of the stage was a woman bending over touching her palms flat to the ground in a stretch her divine ass to the empty auditorium. He recognized her butt he was sure of it but before he could think the man she was talking to, another business casual guy waved him over as he called out to everyone.

"Front and center! Doctor Darcy's here!" The people, aside from those who must be the crew moved to a mass center stage. The woman with the tight black pants and fine ass stood and for a second Darcy was positive it was Elizabeth. She moved to stand in the back and as much as he would like to the men in suits were talking to him and he could not stare at the dancer.

"Everyone this is Doctor Will Darcy, he's here to fix you up when you break and be an all around good guy. Darcy this is everyone, and I promise you that they will keep you on your toes." The older man said Darcy recognized him to be the voice he had often spoken to on the phone, Edward Gardner. As if prearranged individuals began to give their name, job, and then someone else's name. It began with the younger man on the right of Edward.

"Chris Brandon, Producer/ Business, Marianna Dashwood – Brandon." Chris said proudly, he was the sandy haired man talking to the strawberry blonde doing push ups. Next to him was a taller and younger still brunette man,

"Eddie Ferrars, Producer/ Business, Elinor Dashwood." He too was proud and beaming, primarily as he said the last name. There were a few comments from the peanut gallery at the last name as well. The name game soon moved to a red head sitting on the floor.

"Anne Elliot, ballet dancer, Fredrick Wentworth!" More comments from the peanut gallery, lots of applause.

"Cathy Tilney, costumer, Henry Tilney." Said a dinky dark haired woman in the beginning stages of pregnancy. She rubbed her stomach as she said Henry's name.

"Edmund Bertram, dancer, Fanny Prince." Said a dark haired man, there were many shouts of 'about (insert random expletive) time.' Apparently that relationship was a publicly screwed up one. Darcy didn't look at the Elizabeth clone as he tried to place names and jobs. A ditzy looking blonde named Emma gave a dreamy expression and only gave her name and a job, and a reference to going back to school, she listed no other name. Fanny Prince confirmed Edmund's declaration and blushed as she too received cat calls. A muscular brunette male ballet dancer, Fredrick Wentworth, was equally thrilled to say Anne Elliot's name as she was to say his. Harriett Smith had coppery hair, some pudge and a shy disposition she blushed as red as the fabric that she was holding as she spoke.

"Henry Tilney, King of the stage," a light brown haired man said popping up from his seated position, the woman next to him, Emma pulled him down as the rest of the group booed him. "Oh and I love Cathy!" He said, Cathy laughed and replied that she loved the king of the fools. Next was an older woman standing in the back with the Elizabeth look-a-like, she had salt and pepper hair in a thick braid down her back and a fit older body.

"Maddy Gardner, Chorographer, married to that hunk of man next to Doctor Darcy for thirty five years!" The hunk of man (Aka Edward Gardner) turned to Darcy and explained that they had just gotten back from their anniversary trip to the lakes. Next to speak was Elizabeth, as soon as he heard her voice he was sure it was her, but tried not to let it show,

"Luciana Keene," She said, then Henry called out,

"Prima Donna!" she blushed and mumbled something about being a ballerina. She then moved on with confidence and said,

"Pookie Pokster, more dignifiedly know as Ted E. Bear." There were some laughs and some hisses at her announcement, the peanut gallery must've wanted something racier. There was another dancer yet to be introduced but Darcy didn't hear her, he was focusing on Elizabeth who was focusing back at him, both blushed and looked away.

"What about you Doctor?" Cathy Tilney asked politely after everyone was introduced.

"I'm afraid I don't know what to say." He said rubbing the back of his neck.

"It's simple, your name, job and who you're sleeping with." 'Luciana' spoke up from the back; she had a devilish look in her eyes.

"Okay then, Will Darcy – to you all, Sports related injuries style of doctor, and right now I don't even have a teddy bear." He said looking around trying to be funny. They humored him with, 'oh poor baby.' The meeting soon broke up and the three business men took him to his new office so that he could get settled in.

* * *

Darcy spent the majority of the morning organizing his office; he was stationed in a remolded bathroom. It was fairly good sized with plumbing, lots of counter space, and cabinets galore. Everything was quite until about noon when a young blonde came into his office clasping her hand.

"Doctor Darcy, got a band – aid?" she asked, he grabbed one and walked over to her, she had a slice across her hand that was more that a smiley face band – aid could fix.

"Its gunna take more than this thing!" he said dragging her over to the sink. After giving her a talking to about her hand he put some butterflies on it.

"You're Elinor, right?" He asked looking at her. Darcy remembered her from upstairs.

"Yep." She said nodding. They talked idly about the company for a while she seemed to be a nice, stable young woman. Of course that's what he thought of Charlotte Collins and look at what happened there.

Suddenly Eddie Ferrars came in half carrying 'Luciana', however when he saw Elinor he dropped the dancer.

"What happened to you?" he asked. Behind him Luciana grabbed the door knob and pulled herself standing with little grace. It was definitely Elizabeth. Eddie and Elinor left both entirely taken with each other. Darcy and Elizabeth watched them go and it was a sweet moment as Eddie fawned over Elinor. And it was shattered when Elizabeth tried to walk. She fell forward and was caught by Darcy, for the second time in their history he carried her over to the counter.

"What happened to you?" he asked, she was as breath taking as ever with her dark hair in a tight bun with soft tendrils of stray locks falling around her face.

"I did something to my leg." She said looking at her; the wheels in her head turning were visible in her eyes.

"Dance step?" was his sarcastic question as he had her lay down.

"No. Lifting this anvil safe made of lead in a concrete box with Henry." She replied.

"Which leg and where?" He asked, she told him and he was able to diagnose it as a pulled muscle.

"Elizabeth…" he said as he began to fix it.

"Of all the theaters in all the towns in all the world, you walk into mine. Fitzwilliam, please, I'm not Elizabeth here, very few know me as anything other than Luci. Let my name slip and I let yours." She said through gritted teeth.

"Fair enough Luciana, I really should've known. Even when Jessie, Matt, and that other guy told me everything I still didn't put it together…"

"Whey did WHAT?" She exclaimed popping up, and then winced, "Ow." He made her lay back down and stay still.

"Don't be mad at them, I was being dumb."

"Fine, I won't kill them. I should've known as well. How many Doctor Darcy's does one person know? No more than one."

"Actually, I know several; a majority of my family is some form of doctor either PhD or MD."

"Shut up." He fixed her leg and told her not to lift things that Henry tells her to.

"Elizabeth…"

"Fitzwilliam, please, forget that you ever met Elizabeth Bennet and meet me anew." She said before leaving.

* * *

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**The guys didn't tell me Elizabeth's alias was Luciana Keene. And that she's dancing with Lady Austin. First day of work/ forget Elizabeth and she's there, beautiful and perfect as ever. I lost hope until today, but she asked that I meet her a new as Luci, if I'm meeting her anew that means that she's meeting me anew and that she can forget our rocky history. There's hope yet I can feel it!**

* * *

Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

October 20th, 2005 6:06:06 EST

Feeling: Surprised

Music: As Time Goes By; Frank Sinatra

Play it, Sam. Play "As Time Goes By."

Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world she walks into mine. Or more appropriately of all the theaters in all of New York City he has to come to work at mine. Fitzwilliam Darcy sworn enemy of the state of Lizzy is Doctor Darcy promised miracle worker of the state of Lizzy/ the state of Boheme. Why can't he leave me be? Why can't he leave me alone? And he knows everything the guys betrayed me and told him EVERYTHING! Damn them how could they? Hold on more later. Lottie's calling me; she's in Maine right now so this is big.

* * *

"Hey girlfriend!" Lizzy said picking up her cell phone.

"Ohmigod Lizzy, I love him!" Charlotte exclaimed into the receiver in the background there was a shower running and the drone of singing.

"You do?"

"Remember how you were worried about me having to sleep with him?" Charlotte said she was dying to tell Elizabeth about her wedding night.

"Yha..."

"I'm so happy you turned him down, now I have him. He's great! The best!" _What's she comparing him to, anyone beats the rabbit when that's all you've had for the last four years._ Elizabeth thought.

"I know what your thinking and I can't compare him to anyone but I climaxed so hard that my toes didn't just curl but cracked!"

"You're shitting me!" Elizabeth was amazed, the todget a bon-a-fied sex god?

"Ohmigod, thank you so much!" Charlotte said giddy. In the background she could hear Collins calling to her,

"Come and shower with me my love."

"I gotta go Benn, but I thought you should know. I hope you're as happy as I am. Love you!"

"Have fun with Mr. Collins, Mrs. Collins." Elizabeth said ringing off. She looked at her computer and began to pen a new entry in her livejournal.

"Mood: Reminded of my sexless existence. Music: Ironically Sex bomb, for everyone but me. Title: Um, let's go with 'Monogamy is fabulous. It gives you a deep and profound connection with another human being, and you don't have to shave your legs as much.'" Elizabeth said aloud as she typed, feeling very Carrie Bradshaw as she did so, she could be the poor knock off, Sexless in the City.

"Charlotte York of Sex and the City once pointed out the fact that if you go a year with out sex you can be re-virginized. I've thought about this and realized I'm a virgin times oh, four years. And the last two I've completely given up, last time I touched my goodie draw I was looking for batteries for my alarm clock. God how sad am I?" Elizabeth spat rubbing her eyes before continuing, "And now Lottie calls, I was so certain that her wedding would fail and her night would be hell and she would be sorry. She called about five minutes ago to thank me for giving her William the Sex God Collins; apparently his orgasms are toe popping good. I can't believe this, I'm happy for her, but I can't believe this!" The phone rang again; Elizabeth picked it up and found that Janie was on the other end fighting with tears.

"Lizzy, Charles and I are having trouble." _Oh God, he hurts her I'll kill him. An eye for a ball if you get my drift. _

"Speak." Elizabeth said.

"We haven't had sex in three days." Jane said. _Ohmigod I am like Carrie! _

"What do you want me to do about it?"

"I don't know? I don't know what I'm doing about it. We used to always sleep together, his sisters left last week and since then we've been going at it like rabbits. But come this week and the few times we've had sex it hasn't been the same."

"Oh really?" Images of sweet sex, roses and candles and such danced around her head and she tried to block them. Thinking about your sister nailing her boyfriend isn't something fun. "How so?"

"You actually want details?"

"I'm taking my cues from Dr. Ruth, now what's the matter with your sex?" Jane sighed but her sister's comments had taken the edge off of her grief.

"Well before it was so sweet, roses and candles, but we got over that, our first time was in a bed but our last time was in the tub – we were going to try the kitchen but both our floors are that cold hard terracotta. Any way. And it was good, no it was great, he made my toes not only curl but crack that's how good it was. He's made me meow…"

"He's made you meow?" Elizabeth said, maybe this Doctor Ruth thing wasn't a good idea; she didn't need to hear about that.

"Yes! And just when I would think about how it couldn't get any better he would spoon me and stay the entire night. But lately he's been in bed but not on the planet. We don't cuddle any more, he just falls asleep, or rolls over and pretends to fall asleep but he's not asleep and I can't talk to him. I love him so much. But want if he doesn't want me any more, what if he drops me after sex. Some do that you know. I'm just so afraid, Lizzy…" Jane dissolved into tears.

"Oh honey don't cry. Don't cry. There should be some alcohol somewhere in your apartment, I know I left a bottle, have yourself a belt, there's a good girl. Okay and then think about everything that could possibly explain this change, but never think he's leaving because this guy loves you. He LOVES you. But he could be stressed or something. Then I suggest you go over there and seduce him, have mind blowing sex and see what happens. Do your best to be supportive and be yourself. He loves you." Elizabeth said.

"Thank you honey. I will. And to say something like you, if nothing else I'll have a really good orgasm."

"Attagirl!" Elizabeth said, the sisters exchanged love and hellos for people and hung up. Elizabeth returned to her journal and began to type again.

I'm like Dr. Ruth, just got off the phone with Jane. She and Charles are having issues with their sex. He's not cuddling any more. I wish my only sexual issue was over spooning. She says that even though he makes her toes pop (what's up with these toe popping good orgasms? It's not fair) he goes all distant. She's terrified that he's regretting their relationship. If this has anything to do with Darcy trying to talk him out of it I'll kill the man. Pulled muscle fixer or not. It'd have to be Darcy or that unholy bitch from hell Caroline. Caroline is a bitch from hell and Darcy has a major pull up his ass and a family that is all about blue blood. Besides he thinks all Iowa girls are hicks, he wouldn't want his friend doing that to HIM. I pray he's just stressed about something like I don't know the fact that Neatherfield needs new terraces and other land work. Yha that's it; he loves Jane, but hates the color of the shed and is calculating the amount of paint he needs. It better be it, if he leaves Janie I'll kick his ass.

* * *

The next day Darcy still didn't know how to get into his office other than from the stage so he entered the auditorium. Instead of stretching the dancers and crew he met yesterday were performing a new musical scene to be sure. Music was blaring as different members of Lady Austin's company sang. Darcy recognized the tune as La Vie Boheme B; he also recognized the feisty singer dressed in a black leotard, pink tights barely visible around her purple and white thigh high legwarmer, and red toe shoes. It was Elizabeth. Chris, Eddie, Henry and the others had shouted 'To Dance" in time with the song and Elizabeth jumped center stage and belted out the responding lyrics while dancing with lots of high kicks and head tosses,

"No Way To Make A Living, Masochism, Pain, Perfection, Muscle Spasm, Chiropractors, Short- Careers, Eating Disorders!" She then began to spin on her toe like a top and it spun her back out of the lime light as everyone shouted "Anarchy". They must've doctored the recording because the music was with them; he knew from Georgiana's collection that there was a sketch on movies and music. Everyone shouted,

"Revolution, Justice, Screaming For Solutions, Forcing Changes, Risk, and Danger Making Noise and Making Pleas!" They then continued their little rant with Collins' line, "Actual reality -- Act Up -- Fight AIDS!" The song changed and everyone clapped, a new tune began, also from a musical. A short curvy girl with the thickest and curliest brown hair he had ever seen stepped to center stage. The song began and so did she.

"There was a time, I don't know when, I didn't have much time for men, but this is now and that was then, I'm learning. A girl alone, all on her own, must try to have a heart of stone. So I try not to make it known my yearning, I try to show I have no need. I really do, I don't succeed." Her voice was a strong belt alto but her body and maturity were way too young for the part she was singing.

"So let's bring… on the men and let the fun begin a little touch of sin why wait another minute step this way its time for us to play they say we may not pass this way again so lets waste no more time Bring on the men!" A bit of actually singing soon began and some more women joined in Elizabeth, Fanny, and Cathy he was positive were in the chorus. But there were others.

"I always knew, I always said, a silk and lace in black and red, will drive a man right off his head, its easy. So many men, so little time, I want them all, is that a crime (NO!). I don't know why they say that I'm too easy, they make me laugh, they make me cry, they make me sick, so god knows why…"

"We say bring on the men, and let the fun begin, a little touch of sin, why wait another minute? Step this way its time for us to play, they say we may not pass this way again so lets waste no more time. Bring on the men!" The chorus sang, before the young woman belted the next lines, Darcy had stepped more into the room, now about the middle, but stood watching still.

"They break your heart. They steal your soul. Take you apart, and yet they somehow make you whole. So what's their game? I suppose a rose by any other name the perfume and the pricks the same." The musical interlude took place and Elizabeth was pushed center with cants of "Wheel, wheel, wheel." With a smile she did a perfect back flip, over and over again. Where one ended she began another. It did sort of look like a wheel. There was no wonder why she hurt herself if that was what she did any mount of times. The interlude finished and the curvy singer had thrust another young girl center stage to finish the song. She did with a shy nature and a soprano voice. The group, this time including Darcy clapped and shouted praise. Another song didn't start instead everyone left the stage and Darcy went down to his office as the crew began shouting to each other numbers and such.


	10. The Asshole

Chapter Ten; The Asshole

* * *

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**Charles is flying out next week to see me. He is serious about Neatherfield and Iowa and wanted to start another practice in Omaha. He really is in love with Janie. The other reason why he's flying out here. I have to go ring shopping. He barely knows her! They've only been together THREE MONTHS, that's not anything to base a relationship on! But come hell or high water he's doing it. I tried to talk him out of it but he won't listen. Jane is a great girl and I don't doubt that he wouldn't be happy, but what of her, she might marry him just to keep from hurting his feelings. That could grow into love or it could grow into sadness. And if she's unhappy I don't think he could live. But he's resolute so the only thing I can do is pray that she loves him and that this will be happy. If he does move down there that would be sad, I would miss him, but if he moved down there and was happy it wouldn't be too bad.**

* * *

**Text Message **

**From: 555 - 9626 **

**To: 555 – 3542**

**Message:**

**I'm in town, where are you?**

**Text Message**

**From: 555 – 3542**

**To: 555 – 9626**

**Message:**

**RICHARD! Why didn't you tell me you were coming?**

**Text Message **

**From: 555 - 9626 **

**To: 555 – 3542**

**Message:**

**Are you surprised?**

**Text Message**

**From: 555 – 3542**

**To: 555 – 9626**

**Message:**

**Yes. Where are you?**

**Text Message **

**From: 555 - 9626 **

**To: 555 – 3542**

**Message:**

**Williamsburg Bridge, flew into JFK, driving with a friend. Where are you?**

**Text Message**

**From: 555 – 3542**

**To: 555 – 9626**

**Message:**

**The corner of Lafayette and Howard Street; the Lady Austin Auditorium. It's in Soho sort of.**

**Text Message **

**From: 555 - 9626 **

**To: 555 – 3542**

**Message:**

**What are you doing there?**

**Text Message**

**From: 555 – 3542**

**To: 555 – 9626**

**Message:**

**Work. There's a ballet company that I take care of. Why don't you come and we get some food?**

**Text Message **

**From: 555 - 9626 **

**To: 555 – 3542**

**Message:**

**Sounds great, see you in a few.**

* * *

Richard Fitzwilliam, a coronal in the army arrived at the theater around one. Just as Darcy stepped out to call him. The men embraced lovingly. Richard was a year younger than Darcy but had always been the best of companions. They allied with each other all their lives. The friends relished each other and Darcy ruffled his cousin's hair, it had grown a little, so that in comparison to his standard military cut it was 'shaggy'. 

"You need a hair cut hippie boy." He said jokingly. Richard hit him, but laughed as he did so.

"Now what about food? You promised me food." He said. Darcy led the way, about four blocks to the best restaurant he'd eaten in. The dancer's frequented it, Elinor and Eddie had shown it to him about two weeks ago, on his second day. They chatted as they walked, talking about Richard's assignments and his leave. He was recovering from a broken leg, which was why he was in the city. They talked about their aunt, and Richard's mother. And as they entered The Squeeze In Richard finally brought up Darcy's new job.

"Well this place is a favorite of the dancers, its close and cheep. But the sandwiches are to kill for." Darcy said.

"I didn't know dancers ate. Or at least at places that served meat. I thought that they were all anorexic vegetarians." Richard had obviously spent too much time with negative stereotypes, at one time Darcy would've agreed, but after meeting them and knowing Elizabeth he knew better.

"You don't know any dancers. They eat a lot, and are usually too poor to be a vegetarian. At least that's what Elinor tells me." It was true, vegetarian meals cost an arm and a leg.

"Who's this Elinor, is she the one that you met in Hicksville?" Richard asked. They had emailed each other off and on during the summer. Darcy had used him to vent over Charles, the town, and Elizabeth.

"That's Elizabeth. Elinor is a costumer engaged to one of the producers, they're both very nice."

"Oh now I remember, this is the girl that you could only describe using music." Richard said jabbing his cousin. Darcy had no idea how anyone could not remember Elizabeth as her own person. Perhaps it was because Richard wasn't in love with her.

"How is she anyway, I haven't gotten any information on her in a while just her sister."

"Elizabeth is fine; she works with the company actually. She and Luciana Keene are one in the same." Darcy said, "But if you see her you don't know that, she's just Luciana." Darcy said. The men had a bit more of a conversation talking about Elizabeth, up dating Richard on Bingley, and asking about Wickham. As expected the topic was painful to bring up with the man who was at his side through the whole ordeal, but he was thankful that Richard had been. The men agreed that the good coronal should make some calls some time soon. They had just moved onto another topic when in came Elinor, Cathy, Elizabeth and the two young singers walked in. Elinor and Cathy waved at him and he had them come over.

"Hey Darcy." Elinor said smiling.

"Hey, Elinor. Richard, this is Elinor Dashwood, Cathy Tilney, **_the_** Luciana Keene, and uh…" He didn't know the younger girls, but the brunette soon took care of that.

"Maggie Dashwood and Elea Tilney." She said smiling and waving.

"I'm Richard Fitzwilliam, this thing's cousin." Richard said patting Darcy on the back. Elinor and Cathy excused themselves to order after a short conversation.

"So, you two can't be out of school yet, why aren't you there now?" Richard asked, Maggie was looking around the diner, so Elea answered with a shrug,

"Bomb threat." Before Richard could do anything other than be surprised Maggie had drug Elea off to a group of young men who were waving at them. Elizabeth smiled,

"Elea has a crush on the dark haired one by the window. Maggie likes to play matchmaker when she can." Richard had recognized Darcy's emphasis on Elizabeth's name, stage as it was and took his cues from the teenager.

"Won't you all join us? I've never had the pleasure of meeting some one infamous." He said, Darcy was worried, but Elizabeth laughed and did sit.

"So you have talked to this man about me doctor." She said. It was the perfect time for a conversation, something they had never really had before but Darcy and Richard's meal number was called and he had to leave to go get it. As he walked up to the counter he heard Elizabeth's throaty laughter and he turned his head slightly and saw her and Richard having a great laugh. Damn his funny easy going cousin! Why couldn't he be like that, it was incredibly rare that he could induce that kind of mirth in Elizabeth, and he has known her for three months. Richard knew her for five minutes and they were best friends. The guy in front of him was way too New York, bitching at the guy behind the counter for ages. And Darcy couldn't get his food. But after some time he was able to retrieve the brown bag and give the guy an apologetic smile. When he returned to his table only Cathy remained. No Elizabeth, no teens, no Elinor.

"Where'd everybody go?" he asked, "are we the 'Left behind'?"

"Elizabeth apparently got another call or something, said she was sick and left. The girls and Elinor went with her; she didn't look to good at all."

"I hope she remembers that if she's too bad to come to me, I have more drugs than Pablo Escobar." They all laughed, but soon Cathy's number was called and she went to pick it up, before she left she told Will that she would personally waddle to Elizabeth and tell her about the offer. Once she was gone Richard turned to William.

"I think I made your Lizzy sick." He said shyly.

"What?" Darcy asked, his cousin wasn't that terrible, and he never thought that of himself.

"Well I was making conversation and Charles sort of got brought up, and I said you were helping him think through some decisions and that he would be here for a while. Then she got all funny and left as soon as she could." Darcy was shocked, _shit!_ He thought.

"Richard, did you not know that Charles was with Jane?" Richard said that he did know, "Did you not know that Elizabeth is Jane's sister?" Again Richard had known. "Then what were you thinking!"

"He's planning on marrying her, so I figured I'd hint at it." Richard said trying to justify it.

"You my asshole of a cousin, suck at diplomacy." Darcy pronounced. "Now if you'd excuse me I have to find Elizabeth. So why don't you go home and maybe call G. But try not to interfere with anyone's personal life would ya?"

* * *

_**Prior to that…**_

Elizabeth had been up in one of the smaller practice rooms with Madeline and some younger girls. They were working on the snowflake dance for that year's Nutcracker performance. They were drafting ideas when Elizabeth's bag rang out the polytrophic ring tone of 'I'm Not Wearing Underwear Today'. Apologetically Elizabeth rushed to her bag and slid open her phone.

"You rang?" she said, it was Jane's number, but it wasn't Jane's voice. What was on the other end was hysterical and squeaking.

"JANE?" Elizabeth said alarmed. There was a little sound that could be taken as a yes. Maddy made no objection as Elizabeth quickly left the room. She tried to find a private place to converse with her sister, the only place she found was the flies. Clomping up the endless spiral staircase in her point shoes Elizabeth asked,

"What's wrong honey?" After a few minutes of sobs Jane was able to speak.

"He left Lizzy! He's gone to New York and doesn't know when he'll be back. He called me from the airport. He got out of our goddamn bed and didn't say good-bye until I couldn't reach him! Lizzy, he is going to leave me if he hasn't already!" Jane then dissolved into sobs again. _FITWILLIAM DARCY MUST DIE! _Elizabeth thought, Charles wouldn't leave his lady love without a push, and Darcy was just that kind of guy. But Elizabeth caged her rage for her sister, she deserved better, this was her moment of sorrow and she needed every second of it. Have vented for almost a half hour, and Elizabeth tried to talk her down. At times she felt like an operator for the suicide hotline, but other times she was more of a negotiator talking to a murders villain trying to save a hostage.

"Jane I love you, remember what I told you. Kisses. Bye." Elizabeth said ringing off. She came down and was met by a starving Maggie and Eleanor.

* * *

_**Now Returning to our Regularly Scheduled programming…**_

Elizabeth was furious. She was shaking with anger, that was how pissed off she was. No body dared talk to her as she burst into the theater. She walked around trying to think straight. This was too much turmoil for even dancing to cure, that was something rare indeed. She really wanted to scream and punch something or some one. Thankfully she didn't have to wait long. Satan himself soon arrived. _How could I ever think a good thought about him? And it's not like this behavior is new – look at George. _Elizabeth thought.

"Could we have a word Elizabeth?" he asked pointing her towards his office.

"Fuck you, you fucking fucker." She spat at him, he winced. _Good, I wish I could hurt you more. But you're too big. _Elizabeth smiled maliciously.

"Could we talk about this, about what Richard said?" Darcy ran a hand through his hair.

"Romeo, the love I bear thee can afford No better term than this: thou art a villain! Nay, villain is too weak a word for you, there is none that can describe you. Do you deny? Deny ripping Charles away from my sister who is now broken beyond repair at his loss and it's only been a few hours. Do you deny? Do you deny? Do you deny?" She was getting in his face with her finger, hell fire flaming from her eyes. She was too short to look him in the face so she was bouncing and with one hand the made her stand still. She shook it off and continued on. "I should've known you were a shit before, after I heard about and George, even if he is questionable he is still better than you." She spat, her five foot three inch frame was now much bigger, her presence had swelled to fill the room. Darcy remained calm and began to speak, he needed to explain.

"These charges you've laid at my feet are grave indeed. Are you finished?"

"Yes." She said indignantly.

"May I begin my defense?" He asked.

"Fine." He told her to sit, which she did, her legs crossed matching her arms. He didn't and for a moment he didn't look or speak to her. But after a deep breath he began.

"I don't know where exactly to begin. I suppose I'll got alphabetically and start with Charles. Yes, Charles is right now on a plane here, but –" She started to speak, "Let me finish. It's not because he's leaving your sister, it's quite the opposite, he's going to transfer his practice to Omaha. He's going to move in with your sister permanently. Tomorrow he's making me go ring shopping with him. Charles wants to marry her. Yes I worry about his choice, but not because I don't like Jane. I do like her, but they've only know each other for three months. Charles loves her, but I don't want him marrying your sister when she doesn't love him the same way. That would make her unhappy, because she is too nice and would accept Charles to save his feelings. And then her unhappiness would kill him. And I don't want to see that happen." Darcy said. He had been pacing but stopped to look at her. Elizabeth was still shocked; _Charles is going to marry Jane? _Elizabeth thought Darcy began again.

"He paid me no head to objections even ones to your mother, and if he can over look her obvious want of marriage so can I. So Richard was shitty at hinting, and I am sorry for any strife, but I promise that there will be a happy ending. He stopped pacing and looked at her. "Now about George Wickham." His mouth pained at using the name but it had to be done.

"I'm not sure what exactly he told you, so I will start from the beginning. Steward Wickham and Mackenzie Darcy were our fathers respectively; they were also best friends and business partners. George was born a month before I and we were raised as brothers. We shared everything for a long time. But we got older and grew apart. In high school I was admittedly a prep and a nerd, but George was a jock. The William Zabka type jock. He also was very rebellious. Around this time Steward began to lose his battle with cancer. My father never checked him because he thought that this was over his father's sickness. After Steward's death my father took on caring for George and Cherlyn. Cherlyn was distraught over her husband's death and was poor discipline. My father was supposed to be the boss but never took the role. We were intended for Harvard, it was a family thing and George was family, my father was ecstatic over it. He had been sick but never did anything about it, ironic since he was the head of a pharmaceutical company. He died a week before we got our letters." Darcy paused a bit sore from sorrow; Elizabeth reached for his hand and did her best to hold it in a reassuring manor. Darcy was surprised but had to finish, there was something that compelled him on.

"I was eagerly accepted into the school, I jumped into study with all I had. I had done that when a man that was my second father died, and I did that when my actual father did. George didn't make the grade, he had barely passed high school, his only saving grace had been his math skills keeping his math and science grades up. I went off to school and George took his college fund and left. I have no idea what he did but in three years it was gone. He came back a few times for money, sometimes I would give in and other times I wouldn't." Darcy still had her hand and gripped it for dear life.

"Now I have a sister, Georgianna, as you know. My G is ten years younger than I am. We both lost our mother young, but I was 15 and she was 5. I love G, everyone did. But I had school and father died. Richard and I are her legal guardians, but we let Cherlyn take care of her. But what we didn't know is that while we were gone Cherlyn would have George come around. George wooed my sister for reasons unknown, perhaps a pay back for me, or the fact that she's just as rich as I am, with equal share in the company and family money. She was young and thought that they were meant to be. At sixteen this got her into trouble. She got pregnant, it was George's. He had told her he was infertile." Elizabeth gasped and clutched what she could of him.

"Georgiana was terrified and didn't know what to do. The thought of getting an abortion scared her more than anything else I've ever know. We took that idea off the table. She was going to keep the baby. We hired a private teacher so she didn't have to go to school pregnant and she was resolute. But then shit happened. She miscarried." Elizabeth felt tears assault her, Darcy noticed and took her into his arms. _How strange that HE is comforting ME! It's his life._ But she didn't dare leave his embrace.

"She's doing great now. Even gone back to being a little boy crazy. And she's been going out since she got into college. She's fine." He said rubbing her back Elizabeth sniffled and left his arms reluctantly.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. God I'm a bitch." She said. _No you're beautiful and I love you. _He thought, still reeling from getting to comfort her.

"But in the best way." He said. "Charles is going ring shopping tomorrow, do you want to come along? You know Jane best." Darcy offered.

"Why would you want be with me?" She asked, he almost laughed at loud, but now was not the time.

"I will always value your company." He said her face brightened at these words. Elizabeth felt like a million watt bulb. There was warmth spreading through her, and she wondered about it.

"Charles, Richard and I were going to meet Georgian at Tavern on the Green for lunch and then we were going to go shopping." He said, "Please come." She dabbed her eyes. "I'd love for you to meet my sister." Elizabeth smiled shyly.

"I don't deserve any of this. But I'd be honored to meet your sister." Darcy smiled feeling a million times better. The air was now clear and perhaps they could start over.

* * *

Elizabeth laid awake tossing and turning so much that she almost fell off her bed. And when she did fall asleep her dream didn't help any of her confusing. 

_Darcy stood dressed in dark clothes as handsome as ever. She looked down her self; she was dressed in a white dress, he had her tight in his arms._

"_And now Elizabeth, I have you in my clutches, to have my wicked way with you, the way I want to." Darcy said, she was pounding on his chest, and screaming,_

"_No, no, go away, I hate you!" But then she looked at her face and warmth spread through her again. "And yet... I find you strangely attractive."_

"_Of course you do! Beautiful women are often attracted to money and power, and I have both, and you know it!" Darcy said tightening his grip on her and bringing his lips close to hers, his black coat swirled around them._

"_No, no, leave me alone!" Elizabeth cried, but brought his face to hers in a searing kiss, when they broke for breath she said softly, wispy, "No, kiss me!" He did, yet she trough him away. "No! Stop!" This time he couldn't, his lust couldn't be contained. He brought her to him in every way he could. His lips crashing down on hers and hips crashing as well._

"_Yes, yes! Oh, oh, oh!" Elizabeth moaned. He thrust his hips against hers so she could feel his frustration. "Ohhhh, your "helmet" is so big!"_

Elizabeth woke with only one thought running through her head. "Oh shit." She said into the dark apartment. Well maybe two thoughts. "Space Balls? Darcy and Space Balls?"

* * *

_AN: An ubber big thank you to all who have read this and something even bigger to all reviewers, you guy make my days! Celebrating chapter ten and 84 pages of text! Yay!_

_Wonderful, perfect, prettyful reviewers!_

Maddy02

AshleyMorgan

Shadow of ZAFT

rubberdukki

Happily Depressed

a

anon

Anna

_THANK YOU!_


	11. Diamond as Big as the Ritz

Chapter Eleven; Diamond as Big as the Ritz

* * *

The next day Elizabeth was unsure about a lot of things. Like did Darcy still want her to go with them. She was an idiot, but she hopped that he'd be willing to put up with that. That thought was another thing, was she having feelings for him? That dream certainly made her think so. As she looked in the mirror she scrutinized herself. Had she always had some feelings for him? Elizabeth remembered the Ozarks excursion and the repetitive desire to be his. All through their prior acquaintance she had reason or another to hate him. As she walked to work she cured herself for her stupidity.

_How horribly I have acted. _She thought. _Vanity, not love, has been my folly. I who pride myself on intelligence. I have courted prejudice and ignorance. I drove away reason wherever I saw it! I would've forgiven his pride, if he hadn't wounded mine. Until this moment I never knew myself. _Elizabeth yelled at herself silently all the way to the theater.

* * *

It was a half day at the ballet that day because that night the show opened. Elizabeth stretched out with her friends and went up to the studio to work on more nutcracker stuff. Darcy met her on the stairs.

"Eliza-Luciana," he corrected himself, "are we still on for lunch?"

"If you're sure."

"Without a doubt." Darcy said looking her in the eyes. _Did you know he had hazel eyes? _She thought to herself afterwards.

* * *

Darcy paced outside the changing room waiting for Elizabeth and feeling a bit creepy. He didn't want her to change her mind, but he also wondered if there was a better place to stand. Eventually she emerged and Darcy swallowed. Everyday she grew more beautiful. Her hair was down and her curls had extra volume and she was wearing a light sweater in pink, faired jeans, and strappy black pumps. She looked like the fifth sex and the city character.

"Ready to go?" he asked, she smiled and went for her purse and jacket. They shared a cab for which he paid no ifs, ands, or buts. They met Charles and got an awesome table.

"It's good to see you Lizzy." Charles said as they embraced. "I never expected that you were fam-"

"Charles, we're hear for your bride-to-be, not her little sister." Elizabeth said smiling. They took their seats and placed drink orders.

"Speaking of Jane I realized I was a bad boyfriend and called her last night. She gave me the what fore. I didn't know she knew some of those words."

"Remind you of me?" Elizabeth said, "I'm a bad influence. Did she threaten to castrate you with a golf tee?"

"How does that work exactly?" Darcy asked humorously.

"Think about notebook paper, perforate and tear." She replied with an animated face and gestures. The men grimaced, and then laughed. They talked for a while before Richard came in with a tall blonde girl. They greeted each other, the blonde and Darcy particularly affectionately. Elizabeth hadn't seen Darcy in this manor before she was obviously Georgiana.

"Richard, you remember Luci." Darcy said, Richard replied that he couldn't forget. Darcy then turned to his sister.

"Georgiana, this is Luciana Keene. Luci, this is my sister Georgiana." Elizabeth smiled and extended her hand Georgiana took it with astonishment her bright blue eyes grew large.

"You must hear this a lot but I love your work." She said shyly. "Will was kind enough to tell me about you."

"I have heard a lot about you as well. How's Julliard treating you?" Elizabeth replied. Georgiana seemed amazed that she cared. The girls talked for a while about college, music, and Julliard, Georgiana was over the moon about the woman she admired actually taking an interest in her. And Fitzwilliam was over the moon about the fact that the woman he loved got on well with the other woman he loved. The conversation soon turned from Georgiana's life to Elizabeth's. Everyone was interested in hearing about the life of a dancer. Elizabeth talked for a time about it using some of her better jokes about the life.

"Well, last year was a dramatic one. I think that by new years Fanny's boyfriend broke up with her from Hawaii, Harriett went home with Marshall... again, Cole slept with Benji's quasi-boyfriend, and Marissa ends an evening with a plea for sperm. It was like one big soap opera! The whole year I kept waiting for Sue Ellen to wander into the auditorium and tell us that she's secretly bought controlling interest in our theater company!" The table laughed and continued to do so through out the meal.

"So you met my brother when he was in Iowa?" Georgiana asked, "What was he like once he was there, he wasn't excited to go, but once he got there his letters improved in spirit."

"Are you sure you want to know, it could be painful." Elizabeth replied smiling across Georgiana at her brother.

"Of course we want to know." Richard said from her other side.

"Well the first time I met him was bartending for a friend at a bonfire, where you brother didn't know the difference between a hippie and a bohemian. After that for a while when I looked up 'asshole' in the dictionary all I could see was him." The table groaned and Georgiana smacked her brother's arm. "But as I got to know him I just realized that he was ten of the most boring people I knew."

"Hey! I resemble that remark." Darcy said playfully.

"I know you do dear. But then I got to know him better, and we came up here and now its just la-dee-da, la-dee-da, la la." Elizabeth didn't finish her sentence. The rest of the meal went peacefully until the check came and Charles fought everyone off to pick up the tab. He had a fantastic death glare.

* * *

They walked over to the diamond district after lunch, it was only a little over a mile and most of it was through Central Park. They stopped at a few different stores but everything that Charles picked up Georgiana and Elizabeth nixed. He hadn't a clue about what he should get for Jane. Exasperated he asked,

"Well what does she like?"

"Classical is good, so is simple, but she is distracted by shiny things more so than I am." Elizabeth said, chuckling everyone entered Tiffany & Co. They spread out, Richard and Georgiana going one way, Charles another, and Fitzwilliam and Elizabeth a third. Her eyes were instantly drawn to the Tiffany set engagement ring and band. Darcy and a sales clerk noticed.

"Do you want to try one miss?" the elderly woman asked.

"Yha, Elizabeth is there one that works?" Darcy asked looking at the rings as well.

"We're here for Jane and Charles, not me." Elizabeth said, "These are more my taste."

"Well you've done a lot that was all for Jane, why don't you try one. Give me your hand." She looked at him puzzled. "She's a size five." Darcy said to the lady who nodded and went to a side room to get the sample ring. Elizabeth turned to Darcy.

"I don't know what you're playing at; I'm not getting married any time soon."

"Haven't you ever played dress up?" Darcy asked. She shook her head that warmth was back again. A different sale's clerk returned with the ring.

"This is a glass and nickel version, we can't try one the real ones for obvious reasons." The clerk said handing the ring to Darcy's out stretched hand. He took Elizabeth's left hand and put the ring onto it. It fit perfectly and looked even better on her. He held her hand and looked at the ring and then at her.

"You see, was that painful?" he said, she looked up at him and licked her lips; there was something new in her eyes that did not go unnoticed, he inclined his head slightly feeling a magnetic pull between her lips and his. She felt it too.

"Miss, that ring and you go together almost as nicely as you and your man do." Elizabeth's daze was broken as she looked at the clerk blushing,

"Oh, uh," she began but there was a call from Charles. Elizabeth quickly took the ring off and returned it thanking the clerk before hurrying to Charles side. He was looking into the case at a gorgeous totally Jane ring.

"That one." Charles said. It was about a one carat center brilliant cut diamond but the band had square cut channel set diamonds.

"She's a size six." Elizabeth said. Charles bought the ring and Elizabeth almost fainted when she heard the price.

"$15,600! That's over a year's rent!" She exclaimed.

* * *

That night Charles had called everyone together at his apartment. Dick and Louisa had came early so that they could help cook. Darcy had been there since the shopping trip, his mind still reeling from seeing Elizabeth's hand with a diamond on it._ We don't have any family engagement ring_ _any more, but I think that we still have Elizabeth Darcy's wedding band._ And that would mean more than any diamond no matter the size. Darcy wanted Elizabeth to wear that band. If Elizabeth would ever have him. But he didn't think about that. He had too keep his head, Charles needed an allied incase things got too bad for him. Louisa and Dick would raise no objection but he wasn't so sure about Caroline. Louisa was in front of the TV with a husband and a glass of wine as he passed through the living room. She was speaking along with some miracle pill commercial.

"Consult your doctor before using this product. Side effects may include oily discharge, hives, loss of appetite, low blood pressure. If you have diabetes or a history of kidney trouble, you're dead, asshole!" she said, he had to chuckle. Thank God Charles only had one bitchy sister.

"Need help old boy?" Darcy asked of Charles upon entering the kitchen.

"At this moment no. But you never know. Caroline will be here soon." No sooner had he said it then Caroline entered her brother's apartment. The fun was instantly sucked out of the entire home.

The dinner went relatively well, Caroline complained about things but it was easy to tune out and everyone else had a pleasant conversation. Until it was time for Charles to make his little announcement.

"Everyone, if I could have your attention." He began formally, he was nervous. "I flew back here to do a few things that will be changing all of our lives."

"You've given up on Iowa?" Caroline asked hopefully.

"No, I've decide that I should open another practice in Omaha and move to Neatherfield farm permanently." Louisa and Dick were confused and saddened but didn't say anything, Caroline however screeched.

"WHAT!"

"Let me explain. I love Jane Bennet more than I love anything else in this world. She's my angel and my everything. I want to be with her. I went to Tiffany's today and with some impeccable assistance I bought a ring." Charles said pulling the box out of his pocket and opening it up so that those who hadn't seen it could. Dick whistled and Louisa gasped. Caroline was stunned. "I want Jane to marry me. Her job is in Iowa and that's where she is. And that's where I should be too." Louisa clapped and her eyes were glossy.

"That's one hell of a noose." Dick said, "You'll be very happy." Charles was on cloud nine, he had support from Darcy, his beloved elder sister, as well as Elizabeth.

"You're kidding! Marry Jane Bennet? Be serious. She's nothing but a cute teacher. Admittedly she's very sweet but think of your kingdom, you legacy, and your destiny." Caroline said.

"My kingdom for an intelligent octopus!" Charles snapped.

"You're a Harvard grad and you're making a big mistake if you entertain the thought of marrying that country nobody." Caroline continued on.

"Hey, Harvard makes mistakes! Kissinger taught there!" Charles again replied at his second older sister. She was making his blood boil.

"You need to marry somebody like me. I don't even do math. I'm a beautiful, popular rich kid who went to a state university and was a sister of a light weight sorority. I have no job skills and don't need any because I'm going to get married! That's the woman you need Charles. Don't you agree Dick, Louisa, Darcy?"

"I hate to be predictable but I don't give a shit. It's Charles' life and if he's gunna be happy. Let him be happy." Dick said. Caroline turned to her sister who was about to kill.

"You are so lucky I don't know karate!"

"Darcy, surely you agree with me. Tell Charles that he's being stupid."

"Caroline, queen of Bitchtown your people have come to take you home." Darcy said, and with that he, Charles, Dick, and Louisa ushered her out the door.

"I would never want a woman anything like you Caroline; I've lived with a bitch long enough. If you can't accept Janie than you can not accept me!" Charles growled and slammed the door. The rest of the group applauded.

"It was about time you did that Charles." Darcy told his friend.

"I think that made me sick." Louisa said. "I'm gunna go wash my hair and puke." As Louisa headed towards her brother's bathroom Dick called after her.

"Puke first."

* * *

Charles got off the plane never more nervous in his life. The Tiffany ring burning a hole in his pocket. He wanted to know, he wanted Jane, and he wanted it now. But he had to wait, he owed it to the woman he loved to make the proposal special. He had given thought to using her students to pop the question but he didn't trust them and more than likely the situation would be a bit to adult. Jane was waiting for him at the airport. She smiled and he had to resist the urge to propose right then and there. After an exciting embrace they headed to the car.

"I'm still a little annoyed with you, Charles. But you can make it up to me." She said as they got into the car. He was more than willing to.

After crazy good sex Charles held Jane close to him as he sat propped up in his bed. The stars were out and the glass wall gave them a wonderful view. He drug his lips over her face.

"Jane I love you." He said is again and again in between kisses.

"Oh, Charles I love you too. Very much." She replied almost as frequently.

"You're not like any girl I've ever known well. You know. You're very beautiful. You're also very quiet. And I'm not used to girls being that quiet unless they're medicated. Normally I go out with girls who talk so much you could hook them up to a wind turbine and they could power a small New Hampshire town. It is so nice when you can sit with someone and not have to talk. You're unique and I love that. I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. I flew to New York and realized that when you pull your head out of your ass and realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible. I want to spend forever with you, forever and then some with you. People say nothing is forever. I say how do you explain herpes or The Grateful Dead? Jane Amelia Bennet will you make me the happiest of men and marry me?" He asked turning to her holding the ring box.

"Oh Charles, yes, yes, yes, a thousand times yes!" She said breathlessly. She opened the box and gasped. The diamond sparkled by the light of the moon.

"It's why I flew to New York, I wanted the best ring. Elizabeth approved it whole heartedly. It doesn't shine like you do and it's not nearly as beautiful but it's the best anyone can do, because nothing compares to you." He said sliding the ring onto her finger, it fit perfectly. She kissed him passionately and the rest of the night was held in such a manor.

* * *

The loud unexpected ring of her cell phone sent Elizabeth jumping out of bed the next morning.

"Hel..." she mumbled into the receiver groggily.

"OHMIGODLIZZY! THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU! HE PROPOSED LAST NIGHT. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!" Jane gushed over the phone. Elizabeth focused long and hard at her clock and saw it wasn't even six am yet.

"Honey, no perk before six." She said dryly putting on her robe and wandering around her apartment.

"I'm sorry honey its just that, Oh Lizzy to know that what I have to relate will give such pleasure, how shall I bear so much happiness? I am certainly the most fortunate creature that ever existed! Oh, Lizzy, why am I thus singled from my family, and blessed above them all? If I could but see **_you_** as happy! If there were but such another man for you!" Jane said. Elizabeth was regaining her sense slowly as the coffee smell filled the room.

"If you were to give me forty such men I never could be so happy as you. Till I have your disposition, your goodness, I never can have your happiness. No, no, let me shift for myself; and perhaps, if I have very good luck, I may meet with another William Collins in time. Charles Bingley is a prince among men." Elizabeth said.

"He is he is. And I love the ring. Thank you for looking after him." Elizabeth knew Jane was smiling on the other end.

"This is going to be my brother, I have to like him. You've got yourself a peach. Now how did he propose!" Elizabeth asked giddy as a school girl. The sisters talked for a good long time and after they hung up Elizabeth smiled and laughed to herself. The world was right as it should be.

* * *

_AN: Thank for reading this far; in print you've finished 88 pages. I kiss the feet of all my reviewers and I really cherish every word, but now I'm thinking 'Oh shit!' you guys actually like this piece, now I'm worried. Lol. There are probably a lot of inaccuracies, like a wedding ring surviving from the original Elizabeth or Tiffany's having a tester ring thing that you could see what the ring would look like – like I have here. Oh well it was good for drama. The golf tee comment is really, one of my best guy friends used that – notebook paper, jesters, and all. You can kinda see how crazy my friends are from that fact. _

_My reviewers that continually send me into happy dances (that typically are ended by my mom and her murmurs of seeking help – I swear she's the crazy one!)_

_a, Maddy02, Shadow of ZAFT, Happily Depressed, rubberdukki, anon, Anne, a, AshleyMorgan and gingerspice_

_THANK YOU!_


	12. Spooky Little Girl

Chapter Twelve; Spooky Little Girl

* * *

Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning. 

_Don't dream it, be it._

October 31st, 2005 3:51:09 CST

Feeling: Spooky

Music: Spooky Little Girl Like You; Classic Four

I'll bet living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.  
It's Halloween! The best time of the year, especially in New York. All the freaks come out and it's as fun as hell. Especially when you like in the artsy communities/ the communities that have really low rent so all us bohemians can live here. And bohemians have the best costumes. I'm going as Lucy Westenra this year, an excuse to wear a corset and be sexualized. Lucy was way more fun in the novel than Mina, much more like me. Not that I'm conceded. We're not doing anything today at the company, just having a party. Then there'll be more parties tonight. Hell, we don't go in to the theater until seven. I'm board. I've had nothing to do all day. Well, I take it back. I slept in so I can stay up late, I did my hair and make up and sucked into this costume. But other than that I've done nothing.

* * *

Elizabeth's cell phone ran as she shut down her computer and contemplated running down to the corner bodega for a bottle of wine and a joke. 

"Madam Luci's." She said into the phone.

"Elizabeth? It's Darcy." It was Darcy she wondered slightly how he got her number, but remembered that she had his somewhere in her phone.

"What can I do ya for?" She asked.

"This sounds silly, but I need some help with my Halloween costume. Georgiana's busy." He said a little embarrassed.

"What do you need?"

"My make up done." Elizabeth burst out laughing. "Hey, you should only be laughing if I did know how to do it."

"Touché. Why don't you come over here so I can use my supply if need be."

"Okay. Where do you live?"

"No laughing."

"None."

"352 Elizabeth Street Floor Six Studio G. There's a doorman just tell him you're here for Elizabeth, he should let you up… Oh how normal do you look?"

"I look fine. 352 Elizabeth Street Floor Six Studio G." He said repeating. They rang off and Elizabeth looked around her apartment. It was clean enough and she had food but that didn't stop her from rushing about straightening up everything. She even made her bed which was silly because it was in a sleeping loft and not seen. She got done and still had ten minutest to kill with her book before Darcy arrived.

* * *

Darcy had never known anyone who lived in Nolita. He knew some people who lived in the area, but they had expensive lofts. This was truly bohemia. Darcy told the door man about Elizabeth and was let up without a second look. He found her apartment easily and knocked. Seconds later she was opening the door. 

**_BOOBS! _**Was all he could think looking at her. Her dark hair was up in curls, her lips were red, and on her delicate neck were fang marks. She had her A cups pushed up and on display with a red corset.

"Come in." She said. Darcy stepped in and almost brushed the ceiling. He was like Andre the giant in her apartment.

"Who are you supposed to be?" he asked putting his bag down on the couch.

"Lucy Westenra…"

From Dracula." She nodded.

"And you, is this it – Mr. Prep 2.0?" he laughed and opened his bag.

"Nope. I am…" he pulled out his cape. "Count Dracula." He said in his best accent.

"Damnit, do you know how hard it was to get these fang marks? I had to go to the vampire down the street." Elizabeth said jokingly, Darcy laughed, it was deep and resonating. _Has he always laughed like that? So sexeh? _She wondered. It was sexy and his smile was enough to make you melt. Which she did, just a little.

"So what do you need done?" she asked trying to cover her small puddle of Darcywant.

"I was thinking a classic Dracula with a touch of Grandpa Munster. But it's up to the woman with the brush." Elizabeth smiled and opened the door to her bathroom.

"Step into my office." She said, he grabbed his bag and entered. But she was leaning against the sink and he got wedged between her and the closet. Her butt, her divine ass, was very close to his cough lower body. Both looked wide eyed into the mirror. _HELLO!_ She thought _I can feel that and he's not excited. He's gotta be HUGE!_ _OH SHIT _was all he thought, _I hope she doesn't notice her affect on me. Down boy._

"This probably isn't going to work." Elizabeth said trying to turn in the cramped space. She ended up with her cheek against his chest. That wasn't going to work either. Darcy ended up with his arms her, throwing that sensation into the mix.

"Okay, plan C reverted to. You go left, I go right."

"Okay." He said trying to step with her.

"Other left." She said. With an 'Oh' he corrected himself, thus he stepped towards the shower, and she stepped out of the room.

"Bring your bag and get comfy on a chair." Elizabeth said, waiting for him to be seated before venturing back into the bathroom. She came out with a box and set it next to his bag on her tiny kitchen table. Then pulled her other chair opposite his, she assessed his make up supply.

"Your sister buy all this?" she asked.

"Some of it – most of it. The rest were bought with careful instruction. Why?"

"I applauded her – not bad at all." Elizabeth said opening a jar of cream and leaning towards him.

"What's that?" he asked as her greased fingers slid across his face working the white into his skin.

"Lotion – it keeps the make up from getting into your pours. Good to use any time you wear foundation." She said. As she worked the lotion around she looked at him. He was handsome. His nose was straight, his eyes hazel, and his smile make her gooey inside. She must've been staring because he asked,

"What?" Elizabeth was embarrassed and tried to cover with,

"What are you doing to your hair?"

"Slicked back and gelled." He replied.

"Then we shouldn't go farther on make up, you can need to shower and get your hair done." She said, he nodded and went into her bathroom. Elizabeth watched him go, and once the door was she thought, _Ohmigod he's handsome. I'm in trouble. _And she was, he was getting more and more attractive to her. And the more she thought the more she wanted to kiss him. _This isn't good. "But why not?" _another voice in her head asked. _"Why can't we like him like that, he has no improper pride and didn't ruin George's life or Janie's. You can like him." _

Darcy turned the cold water on and opened the closet. He found towels along side her clothes. For a second he pictured those clothes with his in their shared closet. That thought sent him into the strong spray. In the shower he observed the room as best he could. It was tiny but very clean with some eccentric attempts at decorations. Several suction cup rubber duckys that were certainly not normal. Her shampoo and conditioner were mildly expensive and formulated for thick curly hair, probably the reason for the price. He noted her pink razor and shower gel, something very feminine. He quickly finished his shower and banished all images and thoughts of sharing a bathroom and shower with her from his mind. He dried off and dressed. He then did his hair and returned to her. Elizabeth was reading the back of his make up – It was all laid out.

"How was the shower?" she asked. He rolled his neck and replied that it was fine as he took his seat opposite her again. She set to work. Elizabeth opened a bottle of light colored cream and began to apply it to his face.

"What's that?" he asked.

"Foundation, this looks to be about four shades lighter than your skin tone. You have a good natural tan skin tone. This will make you look like me, pasty and undead." She said smiling and dipping into the bottle again to get more of the liquid for his face. He grabbed her wrist and moved her hand and got some of the make up on his own fingers and smeared some on her chin, she was darker than it was, but not by a lot.

"You're not pale and undead, see, the foundation's lighter than you." He said, Elizabeth smiled and wiped the make up off with the back of her hand.

"Alright, but I'm close. I just don't keep color well, I'm pale, I burn – turn red, peal, go back to pale."

"You looked pretty good at the lake." Darcy comment allowing her to finish her foundation work on him.

"That's called tan in a can." She replied. She fingered a pencil while looking at him but eventually passed over it and grabbed a dark little pot and a brush.

"What were you thinking?" He asked she turned back to him slightly startled.

"Oh, nothing, how to proceed. I was going to go with eye liner, but you're a man, lucky bastard, and don't need it. So I'll just give you some dark circles." She replied dipping her brush into the dark powder. "Close your eyes." He did so as he asked,

"How does my sex have any sway on my make up?" he asked. He could feel the brush on his eyelids, it was an interesting sensation.

"That's easy, god gave man good cheekbone definition, and eyelashes that framed their eyes and didn't need any help. You guys have natural make up." She said, the brushing stopped but the sensation was soon replaced by another, Elizabeth was blowing softly on his eyelids. That was stranger than a make up brush, not bad but strange. It stopped shortly and she said,

"Open your eyes." She then had him look up as she brushed the powder under his eyes. She then made him close his eyes again and he felt more brushes go over his lids and under eye as well as a q-tip.

"Finished." She said pulling away and he opened his eyes. "Now we'll just hollow out your cheeks and do your mouth. Do you have fangs?"

"Hollow out my cheeks?" he asked.

"Yha, marathon man. Is it safe? Is it safe?" she said then burst our laughing. "It's a make up thing. You're almost done." She brushed different powders onto his cheeks and blew on them and q-tipped them before pronouncing that step finished.

"Do you have fangs?" she asked. He nodded and produced a pair that clipped on. "Put them in and then we can do your lips." He did so with out a mirror, he had been practicing.

"Okay, now hold still while I do your lipstick." She said, he did and as she applied the red to his lips she looked at them. They looked pretty damn good. _Bad Elizabeth! _She scolded herself _No, no, no! _She pulled back and Darcy retreated back to the bathroom to change slightly confused. When he reappeared Elizabeth greeted him. That queer look from summer was back in her eyes. _What does it mean!_ His brain screamed.

"Well, how do I look?" He asked. She smiled,

"Perfect. Do you want to go get some food?" She asked, "There's an awesome Mexican restaurant about two blocks down. We could get a bite and then go to the party." Darcy agreed. _I get to go to dinner with Elizabeth, things are looking up!_

Café el Portal was a small but very nice restaurant that was only about a block south of Elizabeth's apartment. They got a table surprisingly; the café was apparently not the first thing people thought of when they thought Halloween. Elizabeth and Darcy weren't the only ones in costume thankfully. There was a tampon at the bar and a 'generic' couple against a wall. Elizabeth recognized several people and waved, she even knew the waiter, a tall man who was wearing a costume from 'Phantom of the Opera'.

"Hola Srta. Keene. ¿Cómo estás?"

"Hola Juan. Estoy bien."

"Srta. mi nombre no es Juan, pero Don Juan Triumphant." Elizabeth laughed at the ridiculous waiter who struck a pose.

"It's beautiful, I love it, it's perfect. What's Chris?"

"Mon ange Christine." He replied looking at Darcy. After the long sweeping stare Don Juan spoke to Elizabeth, "¿Quién es él?"

"Oh, Juan te presento a Will Darcy, el médico del ballet y mi amigo. Will, te presento a Juan." Elizabeth said.

"El es mono. ¿El es suyo?" Juan asked now eyeing Elizabeth humorously, Elizabeth looked at Will and smiled as she addressed Juan.

"Sí, él es muy mono, pero no él no es mío." The conversation soon switched and Elizabeth and Darcy ordered their drinks and Don Juan traipsed off to fill them.

"You speak Spanish?" Darcy asked over the top of him menu.

"No, not really. I took French in high school for the ballet. But Juan's been teaching me some Spanish. Do you?"

"Through high school but I also took some Latin and Gaelic." Darcy replied, a bit shyly. Elizabeth was surprised and pushed a little.

"Latin and Gaelic that's sweet! But any reason?"

"Well, it was suggested when I went into medicine that I take Latin – which I did. And I'm Scottish primarily so my father thought it would be cool for me to take something ancestral."

"That's cool. At least you know your past. My family slept with everything on the European soil. I've got more nationalities than the Olympics." Darcy smiled showing off his new fangs. Elizabeth felt the warmth that had settled in her a while ago go up a few degrees, he was truly handsome when he did that. Amazing what a smile could ignite. They discussed the menu for a while and how often she came to the café before Juan retuned with their drinks and took their orders.

"They did a great job with his costume. Are you familiar with Phantom of the Opera?" she asked.

"Familiar with it? It's Georgiana's favorite story and musical. I had to read her both versions to her every Halloween. I've got all the parts memorized."

"After my own heart! Now I must ask, Christine and Erik, or Christine and Raoul?" She spit out the last name like it was a bad taste in her mouth.

"G would kill me if I didn't go with Christine and the Phantom." Darcy replied. Elizabeth clapped.

"I love your sister. True, passionate love is the only kind of love."

"Then what of Charles and Jane, I don't doubt their love, but they don't seem the 'What raging fire shall flood the soul? What rich desire unlocks its door? What sweet seduction lies before us?' type."

"I dunno, I got a call when Charles first flew out here that was very, 'I've already

Imagined our bodies entwining defenseless and silent - and now I am here with you' 'our passion-play has now, at last, begun . . . Past all thought of right or wrong - one final question: how long should we two wait, before we're one . . .? When will the blood begin to race the sleeping bud burst into bloom? When will the flames, at last, consume us?'"

Darcy couldn't help it she had spoken her lines in such lyrical tones that he had to finish the song.

"Past the" He began Elizabeth caught his drift immediately and followed suit, they finished the song in quiet harmony, "point of no return the final threshold - the bridge is crossed, so stand and watch it burn. We've passed the point of no return." Darcy smiled, and if they hadn't had been in public she would've jumped him then and there. Every bodice ripper thought a woman could have and feel flooded her body. She had been in lust with him on and off all through their history together. But now was she falling in love as well? I could be possible he was just a man, just man, not a villain, she was allowed. _But this battle would have to be in private._ She thought as Darcy looked at her.

"So what is Georgiana doing for her Halloween?"

"A little night music." He replied thankful for the question bringing him out of his love induced stupor. He loved Elizabeth Bennet more than anything in the world but he needed to maintain some normality about it.

"That's very cryptic." Elizabeth smiled coyly.

"That's what it's called, she and her roommate, Christine Morte and some more of their friends are dressing up as musical characters, borrowing a studio and singing musicals the whole night for children. It's a trick or treat thing."

"Then we've got to go. What a clever idea! What is Georgiana to be?" Elizabeth asked leaning forward.

"Eponine." He replied. "They select a song from various musicals, generally ones that are being portrayed but not always, and they tend to do company songs. Like 'Master of the House'."

"It's just so awesome. Have they always been doing that?" Elizabeth asked. "NYU never did that kind of thing."

"It's because you didn't have Erik, Christine's boyfriend. He's a junior apparently, he started the tradition."

They talked through the rest of the meal and fought over the check but eventually were able to walk together to the theater that was only a few blocks away. It was decked out elaborately as it was every year. Although Darcy didn't know that.

"We love Halloween here at the company we really get into the 'spirits' of things." Elizabeth said walking up the steps to the entrance. Darcy laughed and held the door open for her and she passed under his arm with out ducking.

"Luci! About time!" Exclaimed Elinor who was standing in the lobby holding a twenty four pack of 'Flying Dog: Dog in Heat wheat' beer. She was wearing … curtains. Green curtains rod and all. Elizabeth doubled over laughing. "And doctor Darcy!" she said noticing his presents under his façade. If she thought anything she kept it to herself.

"Is the party that bad you need alcohol already… Scarlet?" Elizabeth said in between giggles.

"Not that you're hear now. Don't you like the outfit? I saw it in the window and just had to have it." Elinor said in her best southern drawl.

"Oh, yes I love it." Darcy said attempting to make Elizabeth move from her doubled over position and enter the auditorium. That room was decorated to the gills and the stage was now employed yet again as a dance floor. The members of the company were very comfortable with each other. _And why shouldn't they be, they dance with each other every day._ Prince Charming and Cinderella (more commonly known as Marianna and Chris) were dancing together while Margaret the Devil and Eleanor an Angel ate pizza from the flies with Wonder woman (Harriet) and a flapper (Emma). A baker had his ear pressed against the open door on the oven's stomach exclaiming that he could feel kicking. Darcy and Elizabeth approached the stage together smiling at their friends in their different costumes. Several people noted the Vampire and his victim and whispered to their partners but didn't let the couple see. Gossip was best done behind the back after all. Elizabeth smiled and chatted with people leaving Darcy to do the same. He drank his beer for a while watching and talking. King Edward Gardner was next to him talking idly with him about the company, Fitzwilliam still had things to learn. The whole time the king and occasionally his queen talked to him he kept an eye on Elizabeth. He couldn't help it, that night in the café had solidified every feeling he had ever had towards her, and everyone had been good. After a while he felt a need to hold her, the music and other happy couples could be to blame, or the beer, or the fact that he loved her, and he prayed that her reactions tonight meant that he had a chance. And he had always been a gambling man.

"Luci." He said catching her as she walked past, "A dance?" Elizabeth smiled and looked down at her bottle of beer before handing it to a near by Maggie who took it and finished it off.

"Was that a good idea?" Darcy asked as he led her to the floor.

"Given the alcohol ratios she's getting less in her system than if she did a shot of wine at communion." She replied smiling.

"I think your math is off but I'll trust you." Darcy said the next song began to play slow; it was 'Music of the night' from Phantom of the Opera.

"I love this song!" Elizabeth exclaimed as she stepped into his embrace for a waltz. She got very close both could feel it, they needed it that way. She rested her head against his chest and sighed contently.

"Last time someone did that they had an allergenic reaction to my corsage and had to leave the prom early." Darcy said. Elizabeth didn't say anything just raised a finger to his lips and silenced him for the rest of the dance. As they swayed he remembered words from the past. _Dancing to Elizabeth is more intimate than sex. _Fitzwilliam held her close and they got lost in Michael Crawford's magical voice, their trance didn't go unnoticed. There were hisses all around them but the couple didn't care.

After a few more songs Elizabeth looked at Darcy's watch.

"Oh! We better go see your sister!" She said and they began to make their good – byes. They took a cab to Lincoln Center and Darcy lead the way to the studio. Voices could be heard as they entered they slowly stopped. Georgiana rushed up to them in a perfect Eponine costume she embraced her brother first with glee and then turned with amazement to Elizabeth.

"Miss Keene!" She said surprised. Elizabeth smiled and drew her close kissing both cheeks.

"My name is Luciana please. How are you Georgiana?" Georgiana didn't get a chance to respond the room had put together Luciana + Keene.

"Ohmigod! You're Luciana Keene!" several people announced. Elizabeth and Darcy blushed as a wall of fans approached. _What do you expect coming to an arts school?_ Elizabeth thought, she had forgotten she was famous, however mildly. Darcy stood off to the side as her fans surrounded her.

"Please! Please! I am here to see you guys." Elizabeth said smiling and blushing. That got everyone to back off a bit, but only a bit. "I absolutely love this idea, it's very creative. Did the kids enjoy it?"

"Oh yes." Georgiana said. Elizabeth looked around the room at seven students all dressed up.

"G, who are all your friends?" Darcy asked as soon as an opening presented its self Darcy took it. Drawing the attention to the kids and not Elizabeth. Elizabeth sent him a thankful smile. A young man to her left started, he was dressed as Henry Higgins.

"William Joel, Sophomore, vocal performance." A taller man next to him was in a perfect replica of Erik from Phantom of the Opera, down to the ring.

"Erik Destler, Junior, concert piano and opera, double major." He said. A small read head spoke up next; she was wearing something that Elizabeth assumed was 'Christine'.

"Christine Morte, freshmen, opera." This was Georgiana's room mate. Next was Henry Jekyll, real name Rich Martin, he was a violinist. His date was dressed as Kim from Miss Saigon, her name was Aiko Fishell and she was a dancer. Elizabeth instantly liked her. The last of the group was Elphaba, the poor girl was painted green, but was also a theater major, so Elizabeth knew she was used to it. Her name was Sarai McGee. There was some small talk now that the ice was broken; a lot of it was about the theater and Elizabeth's career.

"I could've gone to Julliard; there was a big fight over that in fact. You see the audition was a gift. But half of everyone wanted me here the other there so my father, who was for Julliard played his best friend who was for NYU in billiards and lost so they sent me to become a TISHie." Elizabeth said, it drew laughs. After a while Darcy looked up at the clock.

"Luc, it's almost three, someone's going to turn into a pumpkin if she doesn't get home." Darcy said.

"Can't be me, must be you." Lizzie replied. Darcy shook his head.

"This someone is about five three, ten pounds, and has a foul mouth." There were more laughs.

"Before you go, we gotta sing!" Aiko said pushing Erik to the piano.

"Life after life." Christine told her boyfriend who nodded and began to play. The men soon began the part.

"_This is just the beginning, it isn't an end. This isn't a funeral, more of a christening. There's no need to wear black. This is just what I came here for, and the war has begun. I'm creating my dynasty, the dark side of the sun. Life After Life, you won't need flowers on your grave. You won't need prayers, you have no mortal soul to save. No one should mourn, no one should ever shed a tear. The reward I am offering, shines brighter than Gold. Life After Life You are only the spirit, the first of my kind. It's a matter of time before London belongs to us_." Darcy was a little late because it took a push from Georgiana and a look from Elizabeth to get him going, but he had in the end joined.

"_Every night someone new, every victim a midnight feast. They will fall one by one, and our empire will quickly grow. The Dark side of the Sun Life After Life This is the prize I give to you. Find your new world, and see what damage you can do. Together we will prowl these quiet moonlit streets_." The girls began.

"_Choose your prey carefully._"

"_And Let it begin"_

"_Life After Life Go and quench your new thirst, drink the blood of the innocent."_

"_Those who are without sin, taste the sweetest of all. Life After Life."_

"_You(I) won't need flowers on your(my) grave. You(I) won't need prayers, you(I) have no mortal soul to save. Together we will prowl these quiet moonlit streets. Choose our prey carefully and Let it Begin. Life After Life After Life After Life After Life After Life After Life After Life After Life After...LIFE"_ Everyone knew their parts and sang appropriately and they ended on a high note. With much love Elizabeth and Darcy left the party. They took a cab back to her home and Darcy walked her to her door. They entered and he collected his stuff.

"I had a great time tonight." Elizabeth said smiling as she walked him to the door. "Your sister is a wonderful young woman. You've done good." Darcy smiled.

"She's all I got. I think that everyone enjoyed this night. I definitely did." They were standing across from each other in front of the door, there was a very small distance between them touching and it was closing fast. Elizabeth stood on tip toes and kissed his cheek.

"I'll see you Monday." She said. Darcy was surprised and happy, thus couldn't say a thing other than 'Yha, good night'. And leave in a daze. Elizabeth walked out onto her fire escape and tried to watch him leave, not remembering that the street was the other way.

* * *

Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning. 

_Don't dream it, be it._

November 1st, 2005 5:15:54 CST

Feeling: Tired and confused

Music: In His Eyes; Jekyll and Hyde, Original London cast

Everything worth living for is there, in his eyes!

I expect everyone of my crowd to make fun Of my proud protestations of faith in romance, And they'll say I'm naïve as a babe to believe Every fable I hear from a person in pants. Fearlessly I'll face them and argue their doubts away, loudly I'll sing about flowers in spring, flatly I'll stand on my little flat feet and say Love is a grand and a beautiful thing! I'm not ashamed to reveal the world famous feelin' I feel. I'm as corny as Kansas in August, I'm as normal as blueberry pie. No more a smart little girl with no heart, I have found me a wonderful guy! I am in a conventional dither, with a conventional star in my eye. And you will note there's a lump in my throat when I speak of that wonderful guy! I'm as trite and as gay as a daisy in May, A cliché comin' true! I'm bromidic and bright as a moon-happy night Pourin' light on the dew! I'm as corny as Kansas in August, High as a flag on the Fourth of July! If you'll excuse an expression I use, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love with a wonderful guy! I'm as trite and as gay as a daisy in May, A cliché comin' true! I'm bromidic and bright As a moon-happy night Pourin' light on the dew! I'm as corny as Kansas in August, High as a flag on the Fourth of July! If you'll excuse an expression I use, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love with a wonderful guy! You heard me. I'm in love with Fitzwilliam Darcy. He's smart, he's tall, and he's HANDSOME. I had a great night he came over and filled my apartment in so many ways. He seemed to fit, he just looked right. Like he belonged there. And he handled himself well in my area. No comments on my studio. Didn't blink as I talked about cross-dressing lovers. He's and Erik/ Christine shipper! I love him! Forget all else I've said about him. Other than my love. After the company party we went to see his sister at Julliard. Her and her friends did this awesome musical thing. Darcy can sing! And Georgiana is a sweet girl. But her friends recognized me so I was famous. Like always that is a pleasure and a pain. But Darcy was so good. Stepped in and back as need be. I love him.

* * *

_AN: Let's see… the Café and street are real, but I know nothing about them. I live in Iowa, remember that folks, __I don't know a lot about this world. Also I don't know about all that stuff I said about Julliard v. NYU_

_The Spanish says, _

"Hola Srta. Keene. ¿Cómo estás?" _"Hello Miss Keene. How you are?"_

"Hola Juan. Estoy bien." "_Hello Juan. I am well." _

"Srta. mi nombre no es Juan, pero Don Juan Triumphant." _"M__iss my name is not Juan, but Don __Juan Triumphant."_

"¿Quién es él?" _"¿Who is he?" _

"Oh, Juan te presento a Will Darcy, el médico del ballet y mi amigo. Will, te presento a Juan." _"Oh, Juan I present you to Will Darcy, the doctor of the ballet and my friend. Will, I present you to Juan."_

"El es mono. ¿El es suyo?" _"He is cute. He is yours?"_

"Sí, él es muy mono, pero no él no es mío." _"Yes, he is very cute, but he not is not mine."_


	13. Take Me to the Other Side

Chapter Thirteen; Take Me to the Other Side

* * *

Days passed and much too both parties dismay they didn't get to see each other for more than a few minutes here and there. Elizabeth sequestered herself in a studio working on nutcracker stuff. Darcy was equally alone, but had nothing to do. He spent a lot of his time expressing himself in his PDA.

* * *

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**Didn't get more than a glimpse of Elizabeth today. Same as every other day, but each time I see here I fall in love. What a fool I am – I can do nothing. I burn to be with her, but do nothing to balm. I am a fool. What I'd give for another evening with her.**

* * *

**From: GeorgieDmusicgoddess.**

**To: fitzwilldarcy.**

**Subject: Tickets**

**Hey big brother! I'm good, hope you are the same. Everyone here say's hello to everyone there, (i.e. you and Luciana). The Julliard music department is having a performance in two weeks. I am playing some pieces and so are my friends (you should hear Erik and Christine! Ohmigod they are amazing!) Tickets are already sold out, but I got you box five – for you and a guest. Thought you should know. Talk to you more at lunch.**

**LOVE!**

**G**

* * *

Darcy couldn't have planned it better. He could invite Lizzie to go with him and take her to dinner and then to box five. It would be great. Oh he could almost see her in formal wear, and the mere thought made him drool. He did a little happy dance and checked the time. 5:30, they got off at six, he could meet her then.

And he did. Darcy 'accidentally' bumped into her on her way out and offered her a ride, she accepted.

"Ohmigod! You've got a Ferrari Spider!" she almost screamed upon seeing his car. "Sorry." He smiled and said nothing as he opened her door and handed her in. As he entered from his side he suppressed a chuckle as she gawked at his Spider openly. He was used to money and expensive things, it never fazed him before. There was a moment of silence in which he noticed her stroking her seat and not closing her slack jaw.

"Everything you dreamed up?" he asked.

"And more, I'm sorry it's just I'm used to…"

"La vie Boheme." He finished for her, reaching to his radio and turned on his CD player, Puccini's La Boheme filled the car. Elizabeth's face brightened as she smiled and leaned back. Her eyes closed a tranquil expression covered her face. Now was the time.

"Julliard's music department is performing in two weeks or so…" he began.

"I know! I couldn't get tickets, now that I know people I'd bleed to go!" She cried this was getting better and better.

"My sister managed to get box 5 for me – two tickets. Do you want to fill my extra seat?" he asked, smooth as anything.

"I would love to go Fitzwilliam." Elizabeth said looking at him with a smile that melted his heart. He loved her even more than ever, yes it was possible. Elizabeth was ecstatic; one, she was getting to see a Julliard recital, two, she was going to the show with Darcy.

"Well, I'll get you more details; Georgiana didn't give me a lot." Will said, Elizabeth nodded and returned to her resting position. The rest of the drive was spent listing to Puccini. Eventually Darcy stopped the car in front of her building.

"Well, this is me. Thank you for the ride and thank you for the invitation." She said gathering her things.

"It was my pleasure." Darcy informed her as she left with a 'see you tomorrow.' He watched her enter her building with a wave.

* * *

**From: fitzwilldarcy**

**To: GeorgieDmusicgoddess.**

**Subject: Matchmaker, Matchmaker, playing with matches a girl can get burned**

**Thanks again for your two tickets. You were quiet sly, weren't you? Luciana and I will be there with bells on. But we need some details.**

**Love you,**

**Fitz**

**From: GeorgieDmusicgoddess**

**To: Fitzwilldarcy**

**Subject: Re: Matchmaker, matchmaker, playing with matches a girl can get burned**

**You make it sound like I had an evil plan, and it's a bad thing. Glad to see your fell into my trap. LOL. Um, November 19th at eight. Formal. Its some anniversary so other famous people and photographers will be there, you've been warned. It's about two hours long. I think. Can't wait to see you.**

**LOVE!**

**G**

* * *

Again for the next few days Darcy didn't see Elizabeth to speak. It took him till day four to remedy this. He did so over a ride, like last time. Unlike last time, however, she didn't scream at the sight of his transportation. She just allowed herself to be handed in and settled like she was used to the bourgeois life style and not the bohemia. He got in and started the car before speaking.

"Talked to my sister the other day, got some more information." He said, she sat up and dug through her purse, eventually she resurfaced with a pen.

"Shoot." She said poising the tip to write on her right hand. He did a double take at her form of stationary but began to speak only vaguely registering what she was doing aside from something eleventh grade.

"The nineteenth at eight, formal. I was thinking of perhaps going to eat something before we go – I mean if that's okay with you. We don't have to if you'd rather not…" _Smooth Darcy, real smooth. Just kill the mood, the buzz, the joy! _His thoughts were stopped by Elizabeth's laughter, she could read his mind.

"Dinner sounds very nice, thank you, when should I be ready on the nineteenth?" She asked changing the subject.

"Um, how does six sound?" he asked, she said that it was fine and they slipped into silence until Darcy turned on the radio, this time Puccini did not fill the car but Aerosmith. "Loving you has got to be, like the devil and the deep blue sea. My conscience got to be my guide. Ah, honey, take me to the other side." Elizabeth laughed slightly to herself and began to dance; he gave her a look via the mirror.

"I love Aerosmith!" she exclaimed as she danced in her seat and sang along. He couldn't take his eyes off of her. It was possible, he could love her more than, before was nothing compared to this.

"What?" she asked looking at him.

"Nothing." He replied laughing at her Steven Tyler scream.

"Oh come on! Pull the cob outta your ass and rock. Steven would want you to." Elizabeth said jokingly.

"I resemble that remark." Darcy said they both laughed.

"Oh come on, let's hear your scream." She said.

"No."

"Yes."

No." This went on until he stopped in front of her building.

"Well, good – bye jerk face." Elizabeth said starting to leave.

"Lizzie." He said stopping her.

"Yes?" she questioned.

"YYYHHHAAA! He screamed Elizabeth howled with hysteric laughter as she headed home.

* * *

Performances ended and the company began rehearsals for its next project, the Nutcracker. That didn't mean that Darcy and Elizabeth saw more of each other. In fact it wasn't till the nineteenth its self did they speak.

"We're still on for tonight, right?" Darcy asked.

"If you are, I am." Elizabeth replied.

"See you at six then." Darcy said thrilled yet again at the opportunity to be with her.

Elizabeth and the rest of the dancers got off at three that day because of set work and light changes needed in the auditorium. And Elizabeth almost ran home. After quick clean of her house she showered and began to get ready.

* * *

At exactly six he came, she wasn't quite ready. But she let him in. _God, he looked… _she couldn't find words to finish that statement. Fitzwilliam Darcy was wearing a tux. The gods were smiling on her.

"Come in, come in." she said amazed her voice worked, he did. "I'm almost ready, so just make yourself at home." She said before hurrying back to the bathroom, now more for support than anything else.

Darcy too needed support, she was breath taking and apparently her look wasn't complete. When she was done she was going to test every once of self control he had to keep form taking her to where ever her bed was and… _Bad Fitzwilliam, she's just a friend who's going to see your_ _sister_ _not spend the evening with you._ Darcy scolded himself and looked around the room trying to distract himself. The last time he was here he never got a good look at her place. There were books and CDs stacked everywhere there was a surface. She didn't have a TV or much wall space. The color was covered by posters and photographs. She didn't even have any lamps. Darcy sat down on the couch and looked at the coffee table. Laptop, Cosmo, First Impressions, Primero Impresiones, Premières Impressions, Illustrated Classics First Impressions, there were about seven copies of the same book. Absentmindedly he grabbed a copy (an English one) and let it fall open to somewhere in the middle, he skimmed,

"_In vain have I struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you."_

_Chick flick_ he thought and flipped the page.

"_You are mistaken, Mr. Darcy, if you supposed that the mode of your declaration affected me in any other way than as it spared me the concern which I might have felt in refusing you, had you behaved in a more gentleman – like manner." _

_Then again, maybe not. _He read on.

"_You could not have made me the offer of your hand in any possible way that would have tempted me to accept it." _

_Wow, _he thought, _sounds like Elizabeth. _He flipped another few pages, _"Elizabeth awoke…"_ _It IS an Elizabeth that is just too weird. And wasn't the guy's name Darcy? Creepy! Creepy! Creepy! _He thought. It was just too strange, too much of a coincidence. He closed the book and stared at the cover until he heard Elizabeth's heels click into the room. He looked up at her and caught his breath, she was perfect. Elizabeth's dress was amazing, looking exactly like Princess Grace's outfit from Rear Window, down to the shoes and shawl. Her hair was half pined up with pearl clips on each side and she had let it remain naturally curly. He was almost speechless.

"You look," swallow, "beautiful." He finally managed.

"Thank you, you don't look half bad yourself." Elizabeth replied. _Half bad, Lizzie, the man is a god! _She thought. He stood, book in hand and said,

"Shall we go?" She nodded, and then noticed he was still holding her novel, he noticed as well and awkwardly put it down. Covering the situation he asked,

"Obsess much?"

"Oh, First Impressions. It's my favorite book, so ever year my father buys me another copy of it. It's our little thing. Have you read it?" She asked grabbing her purse and adjusting her shawl.

"Can't say that I have." He relied and they exited her apartment together. He led her to his awaiting car feeling very proud to hand her into it.

"So where are we going?" She asked as they headed to the upper west side.

"Picholine." Darcy replied, Elizabeth gasped.

"Picholine? But that place is so expensive and upscale and…" She said she was just astonished at getting to go there.

"Would you prefer to go somewhere else?" He asked, he could tell she didn't. "You deserve no less; you are after all Luciana Keene. Besides, I thought you could teach me some French." Darcy said Elizabeth blushed but said nothing. She was genuinely uncomfortable. She was not used to anything near this prospect.

"Only if you teach me some Gaelic." She said, and then kicked herself. "I shouldn't have asked your giving me so much by taking me to such an expensive place."

"What are you talking about? It is my pleasure to take you where ever you want to go, and I will do my best to teach you what I know of Gaelic." He said he was confused at how shy and strange she was acting over this place. Wasn't she used to all this?

"You're way too good to me Darcy. Taking me to the other side and teaching me a new language." She said.

"The other side?" he asked.

"There is a great difference between those who go and see a show and those who perform in them. Eating at Picholine would be about the same price as my rent." She said.

"But you're Luciana Keene, people flip when they see you." He said, "You've been in People." Darcy remembered his sister clipping the articles out and pinning them to her walls.

"That doesn't mean and thing and the articles are small." She said still uncomfortable, he made to say something more about how she was just as famous and as worth as anyone to eat at any restaurant when she cut him off.

"Forget I said a thing, I shouldn't have mentioned it." She said apolitically, the rest of the ride was silent. Darcy turned on the stereo and 'The Song That Goes Like This' from Spamalot. Elizabeth settled in her seat and smiled, humming along. They reached the restraint in a now comfortable quiet instead of an awkward one. Darcy got out and went around the car to help her and give the keys to the valet who looked at them both before taking the car. Darcy shook his head as if to tell her that she was not to think the guy was passing judgment. He offered her his arm and they entered the restraint. It was a beautiful place with low slung chandeliers and walls covered in musty pink linen, the place looked fifty years older than what it was. Darcy led them to the maitre'D, a tall well dressed man behind a podium.

"Bonjour Simon." Darcy said to the man who greeted Darcy warmly with

"Comment allez-vous?" Darcy smiled and replied that he was 'Très bien'. Then he noticed Simon's intent look on Elizabeth and said,

"Simon, this is…"

"Miss Keene, it is an honor to meet you." Simon said cutting Darcy off, Elizabeth blushed shyly. "I must say that I am a fan." Simon continued to say with a little bow. Darcy cleared his throat, extremely territorial now. Simon took the hint.

"Right this way." He said leading them to their seat in a semi – private corner of the room, he left the menus, again expressed his delight in meeting her and left the two alone.

"What were you saying about being nobody?" Darcy asked playfully, Elizabeth gave him an embarrassed look over her menu. Soon a waiter came to take their drink orders and Darcy ordered a bottle of wine for the both of them.

"What are you going to have?" She asked.

"I usually have the Millbrook Venison Saddle, it's very good. But so is the Scottish Game Birds." He replied. Elizabeth laughed,

"Mister politically correct." He chuckled at that, but pointed out that he was just stating a fact. Smiling Elizabeth returned to her menu and found something she didn't feel guilty about ordering.

The wine came and the food orders were placed.

"So about those French lessons." Darcy said smiling.

"You spoke very well with Simon." She said.

"I'm sure it's the same tutor session you get with Juan. But I think I'd enjoy your lessons more than his. It'd be a bit less awkward." Elizabeth laughed and said,

"Okay, let's start with the basics, how much French do you know?"

"I can say hello, good – bye, I'm fine, and then I know some stuff I picked up from Phantom of the Opera and Agatha Christie." Darcy said.

"I love Hecules Priot!" She said excitedly, and then covered her giddy moment with, "Getting back on topic. Why don't we go with numbers then? Repeat after me. Zero."

"Zero." He said

"Un."

"Un."

"Deux."

"Deux"

"Trois." As she taught him she watched his mouth form each word. His mouth was very attractive, with nice teeth and endearing dimples. She said each number zero through ten and then made him repeat them first counting up then down. His voice was deep and sexy as he spoke the basic French numbers she loved it.

"Now what?" he asked, she was still in a dream like state and thought for a moment. She really wanted him to say her name in French, with that same sexy – ness it was a dangerous game but she was a willing player.

"Another basic thing is a name, is it not? My French name was always, Lucille."

"Lucille." He repeated. Melt! She was in love. "Now what would my name be?" he asked, "Can they get Fitzwilliam in French?" he joked.

"Um, I think that the closest you would be is Guillaum, it means William." She said, he smiled.

"Lucille and Guillaum." Elizabeth nodded also pleased with how that sounded. She taught him how to say other things, like Rock on 'Balancer sur' and Bitch (the only reason to take a foreign language – to learn how to swear in it.) 'Chienne'.

"Now what for Gaelic?" she asked him.

"Well, my name in Gaelic is also William, or rather Uilleam. Your name, Luciana doesn't translate that I'm aware of, however, your middle name Elizabeth does." He said winking on middle name, she just glared playfully back at him. "Elizabeth in Gaelic is Ealasaid."

"So Ealasid and Uilleam. I think I like that better than Lucille and Guillaum." She said it was his turn to marvel at her lips speaking his language. He moved on to numbers making her count going up and then back down, she did so perfectly and her lips were enough to drive him insane, thankfully the food arrived and they could divert their feelings to food.

The dinner went well, Elizabeth's original apprehension towards the place slowly drifted away as they talked about everything and nothing. And the good feeling continued even as Darcy paid the bill and summoned the car. Simon gave her another bow and Elizabeth smiled and discreetly signed a slip of paper she found in her purse and left it for him. Darcy and Elizabeth left for the show with smiles. The night was magical for them both. And it only got better as Darcy parked in his sister's parking spot. He offered her his arm and she took it as they walked towards the auditorium.

"Wait!" Elizabeth suddenly exclaimed, "I've got to run to the florist's." Darcy nodded, realizing he didn't have flowers for his sister either. They both hurried to the nearest one and picked up two bouquets. They then proceeded to the concert hall. As they approached Elizabeth saw a long red carpet and she knew that her evening had been too good to be true.

"Darcy, do I have anything in my teeth?" she asked him stopping.

"No, why?" He asked, she pointed at the paparazzi flashes. "Oh." He said. "Do you go through this often?" they began walking again.

"I try to avoid it, but it's been getting harder and harder, especially with the Meg deal public." She raised her head high, and on the outside she looked cool, calm, and confidant, completely immune to the rigmarole of fame. Only Darcy knew that she was not happy but the way she cut circulation off in his arm with her hand.

"Shall we?" He asked leading the way to the carpet. Elizabeth followed with no other choice.

"MISS KEENE! MISS KEENE! LUCIANA – OVER HERE!" There was a dull roar of voices and camera flashes as Elizabeth stepped onto the carpet, bouquet in one hand Darcy's elbow supporting her other. She walked and stopped, posing with Darcy in different positions, using him for the support she needed. After a while and a few individual shots people began to realize that Luciana was attending the event with number five on the forbs list, the photographers soon began to request them together again. It took them fifteen minutes but eventually Darcy and Elizabeth made their way to box five, eyes still a little bleary from the flashes. Darcy smiled and pulled out the chair for her. Devil take the consequences, but he loved being photographed with her. Elizabeth blushed, she too loved the thought of being in a photograph together with Darcy, but she had no idea what he felt. Sure they were having a good time and seeing his sister, but she might be doing this with Gaye. But Gaye was definite; Darcy was a huge question mark. Elizabeth cleared her head and flipped through the program. She found Georgiana's blurb and began to read.

"Georgiana Darcy; freshman, pianist. Miss Darcy has been playing the piano since age three, when her older brother would hold her and let her pound on the keys. Since then she has refined herself with lessons and a deep love of music"

"That's a very sweet blurb." Elizabeth commented, pointing to Georgiana's name. "I didn't know you played." Darcy quickly turned to the page and read the bio.

"I play a little, my parents made me from ages eight to ten, they then realized G had the musical talent, I didn't." Darcy said, smiling at the memory of playing piano with his sister. They talked about playing instruments until the lights began to dim.

"I'm so excited." Elizabeth said settling in her seat.

The show was marvelous; Elizabeth recognized some of Georgiana's friends from the costume party. Rich Martin, Aka Henry Jekyll played a beautiful violin solo and William Joel Aka Henry Higgins sang with a pretty blonde, Flora Bialystock, Don Giovanni's Lá ci darem la mano. (_There we will entwine our hands_) Elizabeth cheered for both performances. During intermission Darcy got them both Champaign to accompany the second act. After a few sets that were wonderful Christine and Erik took the stage. As the first strains of 'Point of No Return' began to play Elizabeth was transfixed. They were truly perfect; the performance brought the crowd to their feet.

Then finally it was Georgiana's turn, Elizabeth grabbed Darcy's hand and the pair waited with bated breath. She was even more perfect than the phantom duet; she too brought everyone to their feet with a cheer. Darcy was all choked up with pride for his sister. Elizabeth couldn't but join him, Georgiana was a prodigy.

"GEORGIE!" Elizabeth exclaimed as she hurried to embrace Darcy's little sister after the performance. Darcy followed behind her laughing as his sister looked a bit like a deer in the headlights as Elizabeth hugged, kissed, and praised her. Eventually Elizabeth let go and Darcy took her place, swinging his younger sister around. Once Georgiana was on her feet and Darcy and Elizabeth were composed did she receive her flowers. Darcy handed her his bouquet first, a dozen red long stem roses, and Georgiana beamed and smelled the buds. Elizabeth then gave her flower.

"A sunflower? In November?" Darcy asked.

"This is New York." Was all Elizabeth said to him. "A sunflower means adoration, pride, sunshine. I think that's everything I feel right now. You were amazing." Georgiana blushed and accepted the flower shyly. Darcy's heart soared to new heights. He about purposed to her then and there. Thankfully he was diverted by Georgiana's friends.

"You were great G!" they all informed her as they kissed and hugged and received compliments in return. "We're all going out to celebrate, you in?"

"Sounds lovely, but I think the only party I want involves me sleeping until noon. You guys go have a good time." After Elizabeth applauded them all, making all of their days Darcy and Georgiana turned to her.

"Why don't we go back home and have our own little celebration? Will you join us?" Darcy asked. Elizabeth couldn't resist.

In the car Georgiana took the front upon Elizabeth's firm insistence. Sitting in the back Elizabeth was able to think about her evening and listen to the music the youngest member of the party picked. 'As long as your mine', Wicked. Another fabulous love song she would love to enjoy with Darcy. Hell she would enjoy any love song with Fitzwilliam Darcy, she loved him. But she had no idea if he loved her. He sure treated her right, but you never knew. His ambiguousness was frustrating. She wanted to know if she had a chance. It was ironic, the nineteenth of September she would've thought she was being mind controlled for loving Darcy.

The Spider pulled up in front of a home that made her jaw drop. It was bigger than the high school she had gone to.

"Welcome to Pemberly." Georgiana said smiling. Elizabeth was speechless. "Oh, it's not all house." G said that only made Elizabeth's jaw shut, her voice was still silent. Darcy let both of them out of the car and led the way to the front doors which he opened with a flourish. Georgiana walked through the lobby to an elevator took them to the ninth floor. They stepped out of the pod and into the living room of the Darcy loft with panoramic views of the city. Elizabeth was in aw. Darcy was now further amazed at the difference between him and her. This was like the back of his hand to him, to her it was like the Hope Diamond – really big and shinny. She hid her amazement well and Georgiana pitched in with making her feel more at home.

"Will, why don't you make a pot of something while I change?" G said heading for a hallway off to the left. William nodded and offered her a chair, Elizabeth didn't take it right away.

"You going to need help with something?" Elizabeth asked offering her assistance to Georgiana.

"Buttons!" G moaned smacking her open palm to her forehead, "I forgot how long it took Christine to work with my wardrobe. I think I will need some help." Elizabeth smiled at Darcy set down her shawl and bag and followed his sister to her room. Darcy stood immobile for a moment feeling domestic and in nirvana, if only this could be more real. He had to be dreaming.

Georgiana's room was a very pretty one painted an apple green with white and black accents and tons of photos; one could only look so perfect. Elizabeth smiled as the younger girl went straight to her stereo and turned it on.

"Thanks for reminding me about the dress, I had almost forgot. I don't know why I picked this thing." Georgiana said returning to Elizabeth so that she could begin undoing the buttons.

"Because you look like an angel in it." Elizabeth said, there were lots of buttons but they slid through the fabric with ease.

"I'm glad Will isn't doing this, he refuses to look at any form of my underwear, this would kill him." Georgiana joked as the buttons fell past her butt.

"Then this place needs another woman." Elizabeth said without thinking. G gave a little gasp but let the subject roll by and soon she was out of the dress and putting on her pajamas. Elizabeth returned to the living room giving the youth some privacy. Darcy stood in front of the fireplace, arm on the mantle mug in his hand waiting. His tie was off, so was his jacket and vest. The top three buttons were undone and he had ditched his shoes. Elizabeth felt her breath catch and her heart palpitate. _Cool, calm, and collected. Your just friends in actually reality, not lovers in a Harlequin. _Elizabeth thought to herself over and over again, but with him there being him she would go for the petite strong willed heroine with a one syllable name doomed to love the man violently until their wedding. After the one little fantasy Elizabeth made her mind stay on track from that point forward, it was a dangerous game and she was a terrible player. After Elizabeth finally let her breath our William noticed her. It was his turn to go romantic. She was wearing everything she had on when they entered the house, for the most part, but she was standing like she was at home, and he knew she had just done a very sisterly thing with his sister. It was like they were married, something sixties, but married. He could almost see Rear Window. Thankfully before he could do anything too stupid (other than stare at her in the dim light) Georgiana came in and everyone reverted back to being friends.

They sat in different portions of furniture in varied positions until Elizabeth realized Georgiana had fallen asleep on the floor in front of the fire. Darcy smiled at his sister curled like a cat on the hearth rug and gently got her to bed. When he returned to the dim room He found Elizabeth staring out of the window at the illuminated skyline mug in hand arms crossed. It was a cinematic moment, a perfect shot; he could see it in a classic drama piece. He couldn't help but watch. There was a magnitude and he felt himself drawn to her, and before he knew it he was standing behind her one hand resting on her shoulder as they both looked out the window.

"_I feel your fingers - Cold on my shoulder - Your chilling touch, as it runs down my spine - Watching your eyes as they invade my soul - Forbidden pleasures I'm afraid to make mine. At the touch of your hand - At the sound of your voice - At the moment your eyes meet mine - I am out of my mind - I am out of control - Full of feelings I can't define!"_ The music was too much for them, to cinematic, their eyes met in the reflection.

"_It's a sin with a name –"_

"_Like a hand in a flame –"_

"_And our senses proclaim… It's a dangerous game!" _They couldn't drop their gaze; slowly Darcy brought his other hand to rest on her other shoulder and brought himself that much closer to her. She fidgeted with the mug in her hands. Her look was so intense, her perfume intoxication it's self, he couldn't help but let Hyde's words flow out of him. He began softly, it was just a whim, possession by something not his own.

"_A darker dream - That has no ending - That's so unreal you believe that it's true! A dance of death - Out of a mystery tale - The frightened princess doesn't know what to do! Will the ghosts go away?" _Elizabeth responded with the next line, her eyes boring into his via the glass.

"_No."_

"_Will she will them to stay?" _He asked, a bit bolder, somewhat less like Jekyll and more like Hyde.

"_No."_ She responded again, with that same shy passion that seemed to fit her and Lucy, to some extent.

"_Either way, there's no way to win!"_ He sang.

"_All I know is' I'm lost - And I'm counting the cost - My emotions are in a spin! I don't know who to blame..."_ Elizabeth followed, singing with more affection and backing more into his arms so that his lips were above her ear and she could feel his breath play with her hair.

"_It's a crime and a shame!"_

"_But it's true all the same."_

"_It's a dangerous game!"_ They finished together, somehow Elizabeth got brought around to be against his chest, she leaned on him, tight in his embrace as they continued, singing loudly, like they were cast upon the stage.

"_No one speaks - Not one word - But what words are in our eyes."_

"_Silence speaks" _She said breathy.

"_Loud and clear"_ was his more solid reply, but her voice was stronger on the next line.

"_All the words we (don't) want to hear!"_ They continued their duet, resonate and impassionate clinging to each other, the look in her eyes conveyed that she was trying to speak, and that this was her only way. Darcy's eyes were much the same.

"_At the touch of your hand - At the sound of your voice - At the moment your eyes meet mine - I am losing my mind - I am losing control - Fighting feelings I can't define!"_

"_It's a sin with a name"_ Elizabeth sang.

"_No remorse and no shame - Fire, fury and flame"_ Darcy continued, his voice was like that of Michael Crawford's or Anthony Warlow, except better because he was hers.

"_Cos the devil's to blame!"_

"_And the angels proclaim it's a dangerous game!"_ They both finished and Darcy brought his lips to hers the fire that was in their singing was in that kiss that brought the heavens to them both. For too long had each party wanted this and they were determined to have some time in the lip lock. It was deep and passionate, much like their mutual emotions, however it didn't last long. From the next room the sound of Georgiana's creaking bedsprings as she rolled over reminded them that they were not alone. Reluctantly they gathered her stuff and Darcy took her home.

"I had a wonderful time tonight Fitzwilliam; I don't think I could've had a better one." Elizabeth said standing at her door.

"The feeling is likewise, A Thaisce." He said, she kissed him sweetly on the lips, it was short and closed mouthed but it would have to do. And the fact she was willing to kiss him period made his night.

"Ego amo te A Thaisce." He said reluctantly leaving. So soft that he barely heard it she replied,

"Je t'aime."

* * *

_AN: Thanks again (and again, and again) to my reviewers. I hope everything is still good for you. I also hope you'll ignore any issues that this story has with that whole 'reality' thing. The day my parents let me go to New York the four riders of the Apocalypse will be upon us. I also have a B in Spanish so I hope that I didn't butcher the non English/ Spanish languages I used here. _

A Thaisce: My Treasure, (99 sure)

Ego amo te A Thaisce: I love you, my treasure.

Je t'aime: I love you

_Thanks for reading this far! Oh, PS the Erik/ Christine refrences are deliberate and I do ship them – thought ya'll should know (if it wasn't obvious already) _


	14. The End of Innocence

Chapter Fourteen; The End of Innocence

* * *

If Music be the Food of Love Play On

_And listen to the music of the night_

November 20th, 2005

Feeling: Thrilled

Music: Matchmaker; Fiddler on the Roof, thirtieth anniversary edition of the original move cast

K-I-S-S-I-N-G

Luciana and William sitting in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g! First comes love then comes marriage. Then comes the baby in the baby carriage. My brother FINALLY kissed Luciana last night. It's about time; he's been in love with her ever since his first day at Lady Austin's. They danced to my tune well, he took her to dinner, they went to the show and came back home. It was fun, Luci is a wonderful woman. Then I fell asleep, next thing I know I hear them singing with my stereo. And then all was silent, they were necking. From Christine and Erik I know song is a prelude to a kiss, I'm so happy about this! Liam is so in love with her and she is so in love with him. They think I don't see. He's been like this since Iowa and an Elizabeth Bennet… Hold on… I googled Luciana and apparently she and Elizabeth Bennet of Maryton, IOWA are one in the same. Liam met Luciana before he knew, how didn't he know? That means he's been in love with her for a long time. If I play my cards right I may be getting a new sister by next recital. Ohmigod! I forgot to talk about the show. But I'll do it later, I have a thing…

More later

G

* * *

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**I feel your fingers - Cold on my shoulder - Your chilling touch, as it runs down my spine - Watching your eyes as they invade my soul - Forbidden pleasures I'm afraid to make mine. At the touch of your hand - At the sound of your voice - At the moment your eyes meet mine - I am out of my mind - I am out of control - Full of feelings I can't define! It's a sin with a name – Like a hand in a flame – And our senses proclaim… It's a dangerous game! A darker dream - That has no ending - That's so unreal you believe that it's true! A dance of death - Out of a mystery tale - The frightened princess doesn't know what to do! Will the ghosts go away? No.**

**Will she will them to stay? No. Either way, there's no way to win! All I know is' I'm lost - And I'm counting the cost - My emotions are in a spin! I don't know who to blame... It's a crime and a shame! But it's true all the same.**

**It's a dangerous game! No one speaks - Not one word - But what words are in our eyes. Silence speaks Loud and clear all the words we (don't) want to hear! At the touch of your hand - At the sound of your voice - At the moment your eyes meet mine - I am losing my mind - I am losing control - Fighting feelings I can't define! It's a sin with a name No remorse and no shame - Fire, fury and flame Cos the devil's to blame! And the angels proclaim it's a dangerous game! It's pleasure and pain listening to that song, and I'm a masochist. Last nigh will forever be on my mind, it was heaven. We went to dinner together she taught me some French and learned some Gaelic, then we went to Georgiana's show. She treated G like she was her won sister. It made me so happy, to see the two women I love getting along so well, Elizabeth would be good for Georgie. Oh Georgie, she was so grown up. It just makes me want to cry, she really is old now. I miss that little girl sitting in my lap poking at piano keys. Yet, I also love the woman sitting at the piano now, playing for a standing ovation. We came back to the house, and I never realized the difference between the bohemians and the bourgeois, I pray that won't play any part in anything. I love her. I love her if she was poor and I would love her if she was rich. After I deposited a sleeping G back in her med I found Elizabeth at the window, it was a cinema masterpiece. Then, okay, this sounds like a cheesy musical, but we sang Dangerous Game. AND I KISSED HER. I GOT TO KISS HER! There's noting, no word to describe it. It was a kiss to build a dream on. And I have.**

* * *

Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

November 19th, 2005 7:02:23 AM CST

Feeling: Moonstruck

Music: And then he Kissed Me; The Crystals

Elizabeth Luciana Bennet – Darcy

I know, I know a bit early to thing wedding (Other than Jane's) But I am in love so… get me to the church on time. Have I said it lately? I love Fitzwilliam Darcy! Last night will rate as high in my memory as my début, or my children. We went and saw Georgiana play, which was beautiful. But the wonderfulness of her isn't the only reason for my joy. We went to Picholine! And that was just the beginning. I was important; I was recognized and photographed, like I was someone. Georgiana's performance was remarkable, I was so proud to know her. And even more proud when she wanted to spend intimate time with me. We went to the Darcy house nine floors, it's bigger than if you configured Freemont Mills high. It's so lovely. The view is spectacular. We had a good time, and I felt like something in the league of Ozzie and Harriet, he was in formal wear, I was in formal wear, and we were sitting at home. Georgiana fell asleep on the floor and when Darcy finished tucking her in I was at the window. Dangerous Game began to play and it was like some musical crossed with a romance novel. But his voice and his touch are just too good. And then he kissed me. He kissed me. And it was too perfect. I can't describe it. Better than any first kiss no matter what movie you see it in. God I love this man. And yet I am afraid. Our whole relationship has been two steps forward, one step back, sure we progress yet it is counteracted and at what cost. I'm afraid to more any more ahead, lest I not bare the consequences.

* * *

_LUCIANA KEENE, Ballet virtuoso and the next Meg Girty for the Phantom of the Opera enjoys an evening with Julliard music and FITZWILLIAM DARCY number five on the forbs fortune list and number twenty on the PEOPLE eligible bachelor list. The couple was there to watch Darcy's younger sister perform._ The clip of Elizabeth and Darcy together smiling at each other with love in their eyes made the rounds at the theater. It stayed out of Elizabeth/ Darcy's hands, but was in everyone else's. People were talking, not just about any people, but Elizabeth and Fitzwilliam people. They were positive, now with this clip that they were lovers kept under cover. They laughed just a little too loud, they stood just a little too close, and they stared just a little too long. He acted so nervous; could he be falling for her? Was she falling for him, she'd dream off during her down time, her eyes would light up if anyone moved that wasn't a dancer, like she was looking for 'someone'.

During the day, when she was busy Elizabeth didn't have any problem focusing. However any sliver of down time she thought about him, it threw her off. She'd stare in the mirror as she washed her hands and picture him standing be hide her like he had that night. It had been a week since then and they still hadn't spoken other than pleasantries. She couldn't blame anyone for how busy she was she was in as many scenes as humanly possible. As an adult, the snowflake princess, a Spanish dancer, a Russian dancer, and a Hungarian dancer, as side from being everyone's understudy. She simply didn't have time. Darcy too was busy, thankfully, that kept him from thinking about her and becoming totally lost. He had to stay in the bowels of the theater, because if he got close to the stage scenes might arise with Elizabeth and neither needed that. The fears Elizabeth felt about their strange relationship were sinking into Darcy as well. Call it paranoia, call it delusions, call it nothing at all, but Darcy felt like the other shoe was about to drop.

* * *

The sound of sirens broke through the auditorium, Elizabeth ran to her phone, her parents never called he when she was in New York.

"Lizzie?" It was Kitty, _what was she doing home?_ Elizabeth questioned herself as she asked,

"What up?"

"Lydia's run away." Kitty said gravely.

"Lydia runs away every year…" Elizabeth replied, but Kitty cut her off.

"We found a pregnancy test in her room, it was pink."

"WHAT!" Elizabeth exclaimed sitting down sharply on the edge of a chair. "How pink is pink?"

"LIZZIE! Lydia's pregnant. Shade of pink doesn't mean a thing."

"Oh God."

"And Jane thinks it might be with her math tutor – she's with him all the time, but is still failing the course." Kitty said. _Wickham_. Wickham was the last thing she thought before everything went black.

* * *

Darcy had been diligent in his work on a New York Times crossword when Fredrick Wentworth burst into the room carrying a limp, but familiar body.

"What happened!" Darcy exclaimed ignoring the fact that he had managed to rip the page. Fredrick laid Elizabeth's body on the counter and said,

"Not a clue. One second she was talking to her sister the next second she fainted." Darcy grimaced; he knew the shit would hit the fan. Fredrick went back to the studio to assure everyone that the doctor was taking good care of her. And that he was. After stroking her hair and admiring how beautiful she was as she was asleep, of course. That laps through he grabbed his ammonia and brought her to. She immediately began to sit up but he pushed her down.

"No you don't." He said.

"Let me up, I've got a plane to catch!" she exclaimed.

"What happened?" He asked, still holding her down. She needed to relax.

"Lydia's pregnant! And it's all my fault!" Darcy blinked, surprised. "I should've never let her study with him in the first place, I know how she is! But then after I found out I should've said something! Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stup…" She said smacking her head over and over until Darcy grabbed her wrist and silenced her with his lips. She fought him off.

"No! Fitzwilliam I can't. It's Wickham! She's pregnant with Wickham's child!" Elizabeth began to cry. This, she was sure would kill all her happiness she had found. He wouldn't want anything to do with her when her kid sister was pregnant with his arch – enemy's kid. What would that do to him, to Georgiana, to his reputation? She felt herself gather into his arms and her head being held to his strong shoulder as he rocked her. This only made her cry harder. She loved this man, but Lydia was going to ruin everything.

"Shhhh. Don't cry, everything will be okay. Everything will be fine. Try not to get worried. Try not to turn on to problems that upset you. Oh, don't you know, everything's alright. Yes everything's fine. And we want you to sleep well tonight. Let the world turn without you. If we try, we'll get by, so forget all about this.1 Shhhh. Don't cry, everything will be okay. Everything will be fine." Darcy whispered in her ear as he rocked her and held her. This tenderness only made Elizabeth cry harder, until she couldn't cry any more. Darcy raised her head and looked her in her eyes. They were still leaking, the tears bringing make up with them as they slid down her cheeks. He couldn't take it any more and he kissed her, hoping that it would make everything alright. He kissed away her tears and said softly,

"It's not your fault, its mine. I should've killed him long before. Don't blame yourself."

"But…" She began.

"No buts Elizabeth. This is my fault and mine alone. I will take care of it. Let me take care of it." Darcy said more firmly.

"How can you help, we're both here and they're there. I can't leave. I'm stuck here with nothing to do to help." Elizabeth sobbed, a new batch of tears falling from her eyes. Darcy cursed Wickham silently and repeatedly for causing distress to the woman he loved. "Elizabeth you need to go home, sleep, and eat some comfort food. I don't want you back here today or tomorrow. Okay?" He said wiping her eyes for her with his thumbs. "Get your stuff and I'll take you home." Elizabeth had no power to object, she was too drained to do anything but walk very slowly to her locker and gather her things.

The ride to her apartment was silent, she was too drained to say a word and he was lost in thought. She got out of his car and walked to her building door with only a wave. She stopped before entering and watched him drive away, another tear rolled down her cheek. Lest she not bare the consequences.

* * *

1 Jesus Christ Superstar Lyrics - 'case you wanted to know. 


	15. Indecision

Chapter Fifteen; Indecision

* * *

_Indecision may or may not be my problem._

* * *

Fitzwilliam Darcy stood staring at his reflection in the mirror of his bathroom several days later. He had missed work for all of those hours that he had been gone. Finding Lydia had been easy enough that it was already done by the time Darcy had arrived back in Maryton. However George took longer. But with Richard and about half the guys at Offutt who were owed money it got done. Darcy knew how to reason with him and the negotiations were painful but brief. For 4,400 dollars George would marry this girl, no charges for her being a minor and they would receive an allowance of 180 dollars a year on top of it all. Darcy was glad that he could really get away with spending so little, but with the threat of putting him in jail for twenty years George accepted anything. And of course this was after Darcy let wax on and wax off do a little talking.

Now Darcy was home staring at himself until his face didn't make sense anymore it was all just shapes. And in those shapes he began to see Elizabeth's face. He was seeing her everywhere. He loved her more than measure but with this laid at his door he had no idea where he was standing. Well he never knew where he stood with her, but now he was even more unsure. He supposed that his departure without a word was a bad idea, but what could he say, 'I'm going off to meddle in your personal life because I love you too much to stand have anything cause you the slightest distress and I've got to make everything right.' That wasn't going to cut it, he was sure. With a sigh he headed into work. He had to go back but would just play it by ear. He didn't know whose court the ball was in, but he wouldn't dare steel the thing if it was in hers, he would just wait.

* * *

Elizabeth was a wreck for days there was not a word from him, and only a few more than that from her family. She was going crazy. Any second where her mind wasn't fully engaged she worried. Thus Elizabeth threw herself into dancing and exercise, she skipped meals and didn't sleep a lot this was becoming too much for her. She worried about Lydia; the girl was stupid, had no job skills, was seventeen and was pregnant. She worried about the rest of her family. Jane would take this hard and blame herself for not doing something or other, and Elizabeth wasn't there to slap her and tell her to snap out of it. Hopefully Charles would do that; although more than likely there would just be a sexorcism and it would be the same. But her poor father, the guilt of it all, the worry, and the fact that his wife would be less than supportive. Then there was Mary, she would feel bad, even if she was not them most favorite sister to Lydia she still had a heart. And Kitty, she was stuck with that group; it must be driving her mad. This all pressed in upon Elizabeth like a boa constrictor. Then there were her doubts of Darcy, he had just left, with nothing. No good – bye no nothing. It was obvious he was severing all ties as he could. To think that he could ever love her was stupid. She was stupid. It was best that he was gone; she could now take her broken delusions and throw them away. Dreams were wisps of smoke anyhow and the wind was blowing.

The company began to worry about her on day three, she was tired and slow, her movements were perfect as usual but she was lacking her spark. And she didn't eat all day then apparently went to the gym right after practice. Elinor was determined to have Darcy speak to her as soon as he got back from whatever business he was attending to. She seemed to be happy with him, but not now. The one time he was brought up she about cried. Elinor didn't match make more than the next woman, but this was romantic mystery that she wanted to solve.

Darcy came back as out of spirits as Luciana had been when he was gone. Unfortunately Luci didn't get better so there were two downers in the company. Elinor had tried to talk to Luci but that woman could stonewall better than Jackson, she was sad and longing for Darcy, that was clear, but she wouldn't admit it. Thus Elinor went to Darcy, she wanted to know if his sorrow was the same, and she wanted to know if he could get her to eat. She went down to his office and knocked on his open door, he was sitting with his feet propped on his desk looking at something. His head popped up at the sound and he tried uncomfortably to hide whatever he had in his hand.

"Got a sec Doctor?" she asked.

"Last time you asked me that you almost had to get stitches" he replied standing up, expecting more blood.

"No gore, just a worry." She said, he went back to his seat and offered her one opposite him.

"How do you girls put it? Oh, yha, spill." He said smiling.

"It's about Luciana." she said, the smile disappeared. There was something in his eyes, that look was the same look her Edward had given her in the beginning of their relationship, when things weren't as good as they were now.

"She's hurting herself." Elinor said slowly. Darcy blanched and swore under his breath. "She's working out twice as much as her sleeping and her eating time. She's going to get sick…" Darcy got paler and began to shake a little. That was when Elinor noticed the picture he had been looking at. It was the one from PEOPLE. She looked back up at him.

"I never saw until now how much in love with her you are." She said.

"I'll get over it." Darcy replied the look in his eyes certainly didn't appear that he would.

"Why would anyone want to get over the one thing you hope for from the minute you're born and remember until the day you die?" Elinor said looking him straight in the eye reading everything that he was truly saying. He was in love, but he was afraid.

"I'll get over it."

"Why? Because it's the greatest reward that woman or man can have on this earth? To love and to be loved?" She was trying to make the fool understand. Everything was clicking. He was in love with her. She was in love with him. His leaving for even a few days was enough to scare her into this unsafe behavior.

"It's over. It's over with her. She doesn't love me." He said. This was insane. Her response was out of sorrow, not hate. She snapped at him.

"Over? Did you say "over"? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no!" Darcy laughed, but it didn't ease everything. But hopefully it planted a seed of something in his mind.

* * *

Elizabeth had been sitting at home by the phone waiting for some word from someone. She had already gone to the gym she was now just worrying, the only other thing she seemed to do. She stared at it willing it to ring. And finally the Gods smiled upon her, it did ring.

"Hello!" Elizabeth said excitedly into the phone.

"Elizabeth? This is Charles." Charles's voice said.

"What is it?" Elizabeth asked worriedly, if something happened to Jane it would be the last straw and she'd just throw herself off the fire escape.

"Lydia's back home, and George, the father of her baby has comeback as well. He's married her." Elizabeth was stunned and the phone slipped from her hands. George had actually taken responsibility. Something else was going on here. Someone had shelled out a lot of money. Elizabeth dissolved into tears of joy – everything was relatively alright, sorrow – Darcy wouldn't touch her now, Wickham was in her immediate family, and shear weight that was being lifted and added. She fell asleep crying.

The next day, Sunday, There was a knock on Elizabeth's door. She got up off the coach where she had slept and opened the door. There was Fitzwilliam. A wave of emotion flooded over her. Love and hate. She loved this man with all her heart, but hated him because she was sure he didn't love her.

"What do you want?" she asked him. _You._ She wanted him to say you and then take her and kiss her morning breath and all, and say he loved her and ride off with her into the sunset.

"The company's worried about you. What have you eaten in the last twenty four hours?" he asked. Not what she wanted. He kicked himself as well, that was an affectionate thing to say. Elizabeth felt her anger rise at the question, the company not him was worried. The stress of her life and what she was doing to herself was too much and she snapped.

"You don't give a damn about me!" she tried to slam the door but he blocked it with his foot.

"I think that in this room I am the only one that is giving a damn about you. You're being stupid, and it's unhealthy. You're going to collapse; you're going to get sick." He said evenly.

"Right now I wouldn't care if I died. So leave me the hell alone!" she was crying and pushing him out of the room. Before anything else could happened the door was slammed in his face and locked. Darcy stared at the door in disbelief and wonder. What just happened? He didn't understand. In frustration he laid his forehead on the wood of her door and took calming breaths. He then left and headed home to call Richard. He needed to get drunk badly.

* * *

"I'd like to see Elizabeth Bennet, please." Col. Richard Fitzwilliam said to the sleepy doorman.

"We'd all like to see her, but she doesn't want to see anyone. Sorry sir." The man replied.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive." Richard wasn't going to take no for an answer, Darcy was being stupid and Elizabeth stubborn and it was surly killing them both.

"Listen, my cousin is a man madly in love with Elizabeth, but he's being a dumbass and she's being stubborn. I can't take this anymore, I know they love each other, but their pride is ruining their lives and mine – I'm sick of listening to it." Richard said, the doorman thought and let him up with a small chuckle.

"Col. Fitz – Rich – uh, hello." Elizabeth said when she opened the door. She was paler, haggard looking, with dark circles and tired features. She was still lovely, but Richard could tell this was taking a toll.

"Elizabeth, we need to talk." Richard said entering her small studio. "You must be aware of why I am here." He began.

"I can't say that I do." Elizabeth replied offering him a seat.

"I know that Darcy has been a complete fool. But it's because he loves you."

"He's got a funny way of showing it." Was Elizabeth's reply, he loved her?

"I'll start from the beginning, but mind, I learned this last night when Darcy sucked the worm out of a bottle of tequila – so it may be a little off." Elizabeth nodded stonily and he began.

"When Darcy first met you he was still harboring false impressions of Iowa, as well as eight odd years of Charles trying to set him up. He wasn't in the best mood when he met you." Richard started with, Elizabeth didn't react. He continued. "But you intrigued him. He fell in love with you. He still loves you."

"If he loves me, he'd be here." Elizabeth said coldly.

"He's being a moron. He's convinced you hate him."

"I do hate him." She snapped, but tears were in her eyes.

"No you don't. He loves you!" Richard said Elizabeth huffed.

"Then why did he leave!"

"You don't know?"

"Enlighten me."

"George came back for Lydia, did he not?" Richard said, Elizabeth thought for a second before realization dawned.

"How much did he have to pay?" she asked voice small and astonished.

"Not too much, the threat of jail was an incentive." Elizabeth buried her face in her hands.

"What he's done for us…" she said softly.

"There is no 'us', only you. His only thought was you." Elizabeth Dissolved into tears.

"I've been a fool." Richard patted her back and reminded her Darcy was a fool as well.

Richard left soon after, leaving Elizabeth to her own sorrowful devices. She cried, cursed herself, him, George, Lydia, and a plethora of other things.

* * *

Crawling, on the planet's face. Some insects, called the Human Race. Lost in Time, and lost in space... and in meaning.

_Don't dream it, be it._

December 1st, 2005 7:02:23 AM CST

Feeling: Hollow

Music: Broken, Evanescence

I'm cold and I'm ashamed bound and broken on the floor.  
You're a little late, I'm already torn

I am a fool. I am an ass. I yelled at him after what he did for my family – he was thinking of me! God how could I be so stupid. I love him. I love him, but was terrified when he left. But now what do I do? I love him, he's back, I love him. I don't know what to do!

* * *

**From the PDA of F. Darcy**

**Richard went to see Elizabeth today. Apparently he told her everything. And she loves me. SHE LOVES ME! Richard has taught me to hope in a manor I have scarcely allowed myself for a long time. She loves me! She. Loves. Me. Me she loves. She loves me. Elizabeth Luciana Bennet loves me. I love her.**

**

* * *

**

120 pages. _AN: Thanks for sticking with me. First, the money is the modern translation to US currency, I didn't know exactly what a shot gun wedding was going for these days. The indesision line is a Jimmy Buffett and the lines between Darcy and Elinor are from Guys and Dolls with a dash of Animal house. I'll take this time to point out that if the line sounds good or is funny it ain't mine. I love all my reviewers and I hope they know that by now! Thanks again!_


	16. Working My Way Back To YouForgive Me, G

Chapter Sixteen; Working My Way Back To You/Forgive Me, Girl

* * *

Elizabeth had cried herself to sleep again, skipped breakfast again, and was at the company again before anyone else. She was dressed in a leotard that a few days ago fit much tighter than it did now. She had lost some weight in her depression. She worked alone for a majority of the day for almost a week after Richard's story. The whole time waiting for him to walk through that door or for the courage to walk through his. Neither happened and she continued in her 'funk'. Darcy was very much the same. At this rate they would never meet. Unfortunately fate had a slightly different manor in which to bring them together.

"Doctor Darcy! William!" Shouts sent Fitzwilliam springing out of his seat as Edward Gardener, his wife, and Edmund Bertram came hurriedly to him. In Edward arms was a limp Luciana. Darcy knew what had happened. She had finally collapses. He grimaced. It was his fault. He gave some directions, had them leave, and brought her around. She awoke slowly and tried to sit up.

"No you don't." he said firmly holding her down by the shoulders. She looked him in the eyes and he saw so many emotions, love and hate.

"Are you happy now?" he asked her with anger. "Now that you've hurt yourself. Are you happy?" perhaps not the most romantic thing to say, but he wanted her health first, then her love. If she was dead their relationship was moot point.

"No. I haven't hurt you!" she said pushing herself up, despite his grip. She stayed up for about thirty seconds then fell forward into his chest dizzy.

"You're hurting me when you hurt yourself. I love you!" he said holding her tight and making her look him in the eye. Tears rolled down her cheeks as he spoke and Darcy found the strength of ten men and whispered upon her lips,

"Ealasid." And he kissed her. She kissed him back with passion and longing that made his head spin and their lips lock for a good long time. As they finally did part she whispered,

"Guillaum." And kissed him again.

* * *

Elizabeth sat on the couch in the Darcy living room as William puttered around in the kitchen with his house keeper, Marilyn Reynolds. Both had refused to let her step foot in the kitchen for the slightest thing. She wasn't allowed to leave the sofa, where she was 'resting'. Of course it was very hard to rest when she was being waited on hand and foot. Eventually Darcy returned to her with a huge meal that was obviously out of a nutrition book, but Elizabeth didn't care. She was hungry again; with William food was appealing again.

He stayed by her side as she ate and then tried to get her to rest again. She refused to sleep, thus he sat beside her on the lounge and they talked. Mainly about Georgiana. It was a comfortable discussion and it lasted for well into the night. The last thing Darcy remembered was Elizabeth resting her head on his shoulder as they spoke and he slipping his arm around her.

The next morning Darcy woke early with a kink in his neck and a soft weight on his chest. He opened his eyes, rubbed them and found himself on his couch. Elizabeth was fast asleep curled on his chest, nestled between his arms. He took a time to have this sink in. Elizabeth was asleep in his arms, and no, he was awake. God he loved this woman. Fitzwilliam scooted down the arm of the sofa, so instead of his neck, his feet hung off the end. He buried his face in her hair and sighed. Now much more comfortable he fell back asleep.

Elizabeth woke sometime later and found herself grappled to Darcy in his arms, like steel bands. She tried her best to push herself up and gazed at him during his most venerable state. His hazel eyes were shut and locked by his thick lashes. Those lips were parted slightly and there was a soft snore coming from them. He was so handsome it hurt. Pleasure beyond the senses flowed through her at the fact he said that he loved her. He loved her. She smiled.

When next he woke Elizabeth was propped up on her elbow looking at his face with love in her eyes. She blushed, but gently pushed a wayward curl off his face, her eyes never leaving his.

"Good morning." She said softly. He returned her gaze of admiration with one of his own.

"Good morning to you too." He replied. Then she kissed him. Upon their breath of air he whispered,

"It is a good morning." He then kissed her again.

* * *

_AN: Another short chapter, sorry guys. I'm just running out of things to make them do. They're together so its easy street, ya dig? So any hoo. Thanks to all my reviewers for their reading and reviewing as well as extra thanks to anyone who has ever yelled at me. That really gets me thinking and usually will get me doing things quicker. This thing is almost done, yay. And I sincerely appreciate you sticking with it._

_XXOO _

_BobbiG;)_


	17. Sister, Sister

Chapter Seventeen; Sister, sister…

* * *

"Georgiana, I'd like to talk to you…" Darcy began looking at himself in the mirror. "No, no, no. That's not right, sounds like this is gravely terrible." He looked at himself in the mirror. What had happened wasn't grave and horrid, Elizabeth finally knew that he loved her, and she in return loved him. Darcy began again.

"Georgiana Elizabeth loves me and I love her, we're getting married…" that wouldn't work either, he hadn't asked and didn't have the courage or the manor to do it just yet. "G, what would you think of a sister?"…

The first performance of the Nutcracker was performed December eleventh, about a week after the fainting incident. Everyone was now fully recovered (two in much better spirits than prior) and the show was a go. Darcy bought two tickets for himself and his sister, bearing in mind Elizabeth's Sweat, Make – up, feet rule. You should be in a possession to clearly see the feet, but not the sweat or the make up lines. Georgiana and he had primo seats, this was when he was going to talk to his sister, it had to be perfect.

"Ready to go dear darling brother of mine?" Georgiana asked smiling at her elder sibling. Darcy kissed her cheek and escorted her to his car.

"Good evening Miss Darcy, Darcy." Simon said greeting them. They exchanged pleasantries and were seated.

"Do we get to go back stage?" Georgiana asked excitedly.

"Luciana would kill me if we came but didn't see her." Darcy said smiling. "Speaking of Luci, what do you think of her?" He asked trying to act casual.

"Well, I know that her name is Elizabeth Bennet, you met her in Iowa, she's an amazing dancer, woman, and you love her." Georgiana said, her brother stared. "You think me younger than I am. But I see…"

"That will teach me never to underestimate you again. You are correct, but how did you know?' he said jokingly.

"Which part, Elizabeth or your love?" she responded. Darcy wanted both. "Well, I looked up her bio and put two and two together. As for your love, do you think me blind?" Georgiana said smiling, her brother blushed. There was an awkward silence; Georgiana broke it seeing her brother couldn't.

"What do you think of Elizabeth?" she asked.

"Georgiana, what would you… what do you think…would you like…" he was tongue tied.

"Like what?" Georgiana asked, leaning forward. _Does he want to marry Elizabeth? Please God! It's just to perfect!_ She thought.

"A sister." Fitzwilliam finished, Georgiana was speechless, then hyperactive. There was a God and he did listen!

"Ohmigod! When! You didn't tell me!"

"I haven't done it yet, I want your feelings." He said.

"And I want you to marry that woman." A good deal of weight was lifted off of him, he could move on with the consent of the most important woman in his life for the last eighteen years.

* * *

Darcy, now with Georgiana's permission to put a ring on her finger Darcy sat back and watched Elizabeth dance. He could easily pick her out in every variation she danced. Her strength was back and she was a goddess. His heart fluttered as he watched her. He fidgeted as he sat in his seat, fighting the urge to propose right then and there. But he reminded himself she needed a ring and a proper setting and he was safe. The intermission provided Georgiana time to slip out to the florist and pick up a few things. She returned with two bouquets one from herself and one from him.

"Viscaria?" he asked looking at her.

"Trust me, now fill out the card." Darcy tapped his pen on his knee and couldn't get a thing to come to mind. _Where are your flowery words now good Monsieur?_ He thought to himself.All thoughts of words let alone flowers were pushed from his mind at the start of the second act.

"Luci!" He called stepping back stage, she was dressed in her last costume, but with the addition of an ancient flash dance sweater.

"William!" she responded opening her arms and giving him a kiss. They kept it short and soon Elizabeth was soon upon Georgiana also giving her a kiss.

"You were great!" the youth said presenting her with the bouquet.

"Thank you." Elizabeth said, smiling warmly at the girl pulling out the sunny flower (sunflower) and gave the girl another sisterly kiss. Darcy soon took her attention by giving her his bouquet. Her eyes lit up as she looked at the flowers.

"I love Viscaria1!" she said, Georgiana left the couple alone in the moment. It was still awkward to think of her Fitzwilliam able to kiss anything like that.

* * *

Christmas and New Years came and went and he was required under fear of death to visit his Aunt Catherine for that time. He was most seriously displeased about that. One he was with his Aunt Catherine de Bitch and two he was away from Elizabeth. Even for a week it was too long. However sister and cousin by his side and Elizabeth on speed dial he was able to survive. The one good thing about that week was the fact he able to go to Tiffany's and not get caught, as well as get to the old Elizabeth Darcy wedding band. Richard was ever supportive and Georgiana fell in love with the band Elizabeth had chosen those months ago when she was looking out for her sister. Had it really been so long ago that she hated him. The way she reacted to him now was enough to make him forget she had ever thought ill of him. That was a relief.

A week later Elizabeth returned from Iowa, she took the visit for her sister. She returned a few days after him. He picked her up at JFK. She was as stunning as ever, but looked even better when she talked about the wedding while sitting on his lap in her living room. The wedding was supposed to be in February, and Darcy knew that he shouldn't do anything to upstage that event. So the rings sat in the box in his underwear drawer. But for the love of God it was going to be hard. He was so close to abducting her and flying to Vegas. Or just dropping down on one knee in the middle of a rehearsal and bearing in soul to the theater freaks that resided there. But he knew that she had more respect for her sister and could do that to her. He would just have to wait and exercise some restraint. He needed a workout anyway…

* * *

1 Viscaria in the language of flowers means something to the tune of 'will you dance with me?' 


	18. With This Ring I Thee Wed

Chapter Eighteen; With this Ring I thee Wed

* * *

"Lizabeth! Lizabeth, I can't feel my hand." Elizabeth snapped out of her daze at Fitzwilliam's words she shyly let go of his hand and he flexed it, attempting to get blood flowing to it again. They were sitting first class on his dime. The Bennet – Bingley wedding was in a week and the party was sure to last twice that long. The Collinses, Hursts, Caroline, Gaye and Jessie, as well as the extended family were already there and waiting for the Best man and Bride's maid.

"You're not afraid of flying are you?" Darcy asked Elizabeth.

"No, I just get tense when I go home. I'm sorry if I hurt you." She replied, looking out the widow. Darcy watched her for a while before he took her hand again and let her cut the circulation off anew.

"BBBBBEEEEENNNNN!" The shout met Elizabeth as soon as she was in view of the commons; there was her father, the Collinses, Jessie, and Meg. That was shortly followed by "DDDDDAAAAARRRRRCCCCCYYYYY!" Apparently Caroline was there as well to welcome Fitzwilliam. While Elizabeth was being passed around by the family to get love, Darcy was being attacked and peppered with kisses and chocked by Caroline. Once the true couple's eyes met, Elizabeth's plucked brow raised and Darcy blushed and apology to her. He was going to have to make this up to her. And he knew a ring box would do the trick but not with the wedding so close.

Eventually the group trooped to the baggage claim, while waiting for the belt to roar into life Elizabeth examined the group around her.

"You know one person with a car would've worked well. Why are ya'll here?"

"It was this or help your mother with the engagement party décor. You beat Gulch any day." The voice was familiar, the body was familiar, but it couldn't be William 'puritan who stool the best girl in the world' Collins.

"Who are you and what have you done with the Collins I know?" Elizabeth asked. The Collins clone laughed truly laughed – the sound was foreign. Geeky, but rather endearing. _Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. There is a fifth dimension beyond that which is known to man. It is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears, and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination. It is an area which we call ... THE TWILIGHT ZONE. A place where stuffy William Collins no longer has a poll up his ass. _Elizabeth thought as she laughed with him. She felt a bit uncomfortable still with him, but if he kept this up she could deal.

"That bra you gave me had made me see things a little differently. Thank you." He finally said. She smiled at him and gave him a small hug. When they separated she asked him,

"Is mother that bad?" the look he gave her was all the truth she needed.

Dread refreshed in her she sat in the back of Kink's van (the very same one she had driven to the Ozarks months before) she returned to Maryton. Jessie sat beside her, the Collinses across from her, her Father and Gaye in the front. The conversation was pleasant, a touch foreboding, but pleasant. They discussed the up coming wedding plans as well as up coming murder plans for the bride's mother. Francis was twice as unbearable as the days ended brining the wedding closer and closer.

Darcy on the other hand was NOT enjoying the car ride. Caroline refused to shut up; she was leaning over his seat screeching directly into his ear.

"You flew in with Eliza I see, I didn't know she lived in New York. She must be something of an oddity, is her job in a little side show – The amazing Hick, sort of a missing link?" Darcy gnashed his teeth. _Sorry Lizabeth, I know you hate this but I can't take it._ He thought

"She does work out there, she's a dancer."

"A dancer!" Caroline crowed, "You're so wicked Darcy, she a dancer – I'd sooner call her mother a wit. She's not refined enough for ballet and not pretty enough for exotic, although I suppose a dark club and an easy girl it doesn't matter. Now really what does she do?" Darcy took a deep breath hoping it would kill his temper, right at that moment he could see why some men would consider hitting a woman.

"Caroline, Elizabeth is a ballet dancer, and a damn fine one at that!" he snapped. His out burst shut her up, thank god. The rest of the drive was silent.

* * *

"thank you all for coming to this rehearsal dinner, it's been fun, especially since I didn't have to do any work, but this is the last time I get to eat at this place as a guest. Tomorrow is going to be very busy and twice as stressful so I'm glad we had fun while we could. When I dreamed of my wedding, I dreamed of a wedding of elaborate elegance, a church filled with family and friends. But when I asked Charles what kind of wedding he wished fore he said 'one that would make me his wife.' I've got the best man in the world and I am so appreciative of all of you for letting this happen." Jane cried all the way through her thank you at the wedding rehearsal and was forced to be put to bed shortly after with a stiff night cap. Charles maintained only a little more composure and soon joined her.

"Jane is just too wonderful a woman for me. I don't know what I did to get her, but I'm glad I did what ever it was. Thank you all for coming, and I don't trust myself to say more than that.

* * *

The wedding was a blurred comedy of errors, but eventually, fifteen minutes late and one flower girl's dress later Charles Roderick Bingley III was joined in holy wedlock to Jane Amelia Bennet. Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking together in the same direction. Antoine de Saint-Exupery. And God had never put two people who were so well fit in that regard than Charles and Jane. The ceremony was very romantic and traditional held at the Bennet family church. However the reception was at Lucas Lodge and all bets were off…

* * *

Ding Ding Ding Darcy tapped a spoon on his water glass as he stood at the front table. The room fell silent and he began, a bit unevenly, but started his wedding toast.

"Excuse me. Would anybody mind if I took this time to wish Jane and Charles a happy half hour anniversary?" There was laughter and some applause. "I would like to say thank you to The Bennets for all that you've done to make this the special day that it is. And, of course, my gratitude to the Bingleys for all of your support and all that you've done to make this, by all accounts, the perfect day. And finally, thank you, Charles for making such a good choice for the best man. Greetings Everyone, I'm Will Darcy. The best man (In so many ways) wink But this isn't about me - count your blessings for that. But about Charles. What can we say about Charles that hasn't already be said, well this is a family affair and I don't want to offend (or implicate) anyone with (in) Charles cough colorful cough past. So I've decided to edit out anything that might cause offence. So thank you very much and have a wonderful evening!" He sat down and there was more defined laughter and applause. Charles glowered good naturedly at his friend, Jane just blushed demurely. "Charles and I have been great friends for a long time now, and inevitably we've shared many things over the years: football; college; my driving license when he didn't have one - and now, a wedding table. Who'd have thought it? This whole thing is about like the Twilight Zone. This morning when Charles and I were getting ready, he turned to me and asked "Is everything okay?" I don't mind telling you that I was taken aback by this. In all the years that I've known him, that's the first time he's expressed any interest in my well-being. Oh sure, he's talked to me before, but it's usually, "Pass the chips", or "Don't stand in front of the TV", or "Did you pick up the beer?" This morning he wanted to know if I'm okay? I blame Jane for this sudden surge in sentimentality.

Now Charles is caring, he's generous, he's sensitive. He's paying me a pretty hefty clip to lie. He's also a changed man. Jane has changed my best friend. Actually, I should thank you Jane. You've done in 8 months, what I couldn't do in 8 years. I hope your streak of change keeps up. This is a piece of work to my right." Charles huffed, but the crowed cheered, Jane got a shade darker. "We shared an apartment or a short time, in college. Not long after finding a place together I realized his biggest hate in life – housework! And why? Because you have to make the beds and do the dishes. Then six months later you have to start all over again. I heard from a wise woman (a man I couldn't find) and she told me that marriage begins when you sink into his arms and ends up with your arms in his sink. Well, hopefully you can get him to do a bit more than I could ever. They say a toast should never say anything that insinuates that the groom is lazy, stupid, boozer, or was anything other than a saint in his past. But I don't believe in lying, especially when it means I get to slam a good friend. I'm going to be blunt, marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.

I jest, I picture that in a few years this lovely couple will be happy with a mini - van, 2.5 kids, a dog, white picket fence that looks like Nancy Kerrigan's teeth. Jane emulating Betty Crocker, and Charles attempting to know best. They'll be very happy. Jane is happy and wonderful, Charles is well Charles, normally when you use someone's name to describe them it means they are an asshole. However I use Charles' name as an adjective because its the only way to describe him. He lives in his own little world, but it's okay, they know him there. And now Jane will be there as well and I don't know anyway to get this guy to smile more, save for a lobotomy. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life, I'm sure the world will just be full of happy and any guest will be wishing to be full of alcohol."

At this Charles just submitted to the roast and sat with Jane as he was laughed at. "I would share more stories, but I know Elizabeth is waiting for me to stop yammering so she can have a chance to add her two hours worth. So I shall close with this, management would not like you to stand on the chairs during this standing ovation - kidding. Anyway, Ogden Nash once said, 'To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up.' My parents once told me that the two things for a happy marriage were a sense of humor and a short memory. And I would like to add here's to Jane and Charles, a life of years, free of tears, bottoms up and lots of luck. Thank you." There was about five minutes of standing ovation before a very flushed Elizabeth was handed the mike.

"Well Will, what a speech, damn, that's a tough act to follow. But I guess I have to do the best. For those few who don't know me, my name is Lizzy Bennet; the 'slightly' shorter, darker, fatter, cattier, meaner, younger version of our dear bride. For those of you, who do put the usual by my purse. Along with these two stooges next to me – I call them Larry and Mo, I'm Curly, and she's Shep, are the Bennet girls, save one who is off avoiding the stories we could tell about her. Of course Lydia has the fewest Jane has the most and we could tell them all." Mary took the mike from her sister and said,

"Like how Jane got a new Malibu Barbie with a full head of hair and a glamorous closet and I got a one armed bald Barbie 'thing' who enjoyed nudist colonies."

"Or how I was forced into submission because she would threaten to call Santa Clause when she was baby sitting." Kitty continued.

"But we won't." Elizabeth took the microphone back. "Instead we have a little song and dance number for you my dear. We've only been practicing for – well a lady never reveals her age, any who join in if you know the words. Hit it Mariah!" Music began to play and Jane screamed and hid her face. Elizabeth, Kitty, and Mary took out feathered fans and stepped in front of the table and began to sing.

_Sisters, sisters, there were never such devoted sisters_

_- Never had to have a chaperone, "No sir"_

_- I'm here to keep my eye on her_

_Caring, sharing ev'ry little thing that we are wearing_

_- When a certain gentleman arrived from Rome_

_- She wore the dress and I stayed home_

_All kinds of weather, we stick together, the same in the rain or_

_sun_

_Diff'rent faces, but in tight places, we think and we act as_

_one_

_Uh huh_

_Those who've seen us know that not a thing could come between us_

_Many men have tried to split us up, but no one can_

_Lord help the mister who comes between me and my sisters_

_And Lord help the sister who comes between and my man_

_Sisters_

_Sisters_

_Sister, don't come between me and my man_

The sisters finished and there was another ovation with hysteric laughs from almost everyone.

"The bride and groom will share the first dance, and they would have you with them if you would." Mariah announced as the DJ she was. Darcy off her his hand and they joined Charles and Jane on the floor.

_The heart is not judged_

_By how much you love, but_

_By how much you're loved by others_

Darcy held Elizabeth tightly in his arms as they slow danced, prom style just swaying and stepping, the distance between them more important than the technique.

_I'll always remember the night that we met_

_Was it May or September, somehow I forget_

_We were taken surprise by the moon on the rise_

_And the stars in the skies matched the stars in our eyes_

"Elizabeth do you remember when we first met?" he asked into her hair. She made a soft hum sound. "I didn't mean it, you will always be more than enough to tempt me."

"Some how I forget, Fitzwilliam, just remember that which gives you pleasure."

_And then, oh, what a feeling_

_Taking our breath away_

_It's what they call magic_

_The stuff dreams are made of_

_It's comic and tragic_

_It's heartbreak and true love_

_The world keeps on spinning_

_It spins like a wheel_

_Young hearts are burning_

_Yearning to feel the magic_

_Feel the magic_

"Good God, I love you so much." He whispered to her. "Words can't…" she silenced him with a kiss that held through the rest of the song. It was what they call magic.

_From New York to London_

_From Tokyo to Rome_

_Some things never change_

_Wherever you call home_

_The heart speaks a language_

_The ear cannot hear_

_But, to body and soul_

_The message is clear_

_It says dance to your heartbeat_

_Fly on the wings on love_

_It's what they call magic_

_The stuff dreams are made of_

_It's comic and tragic_

_It's heartbreak and true love_

_The world keeps on spinning_

_It spins like a wheel_

_Young hearts are burning_

_Yearning to feel the magic_

_Feel the magic_

_The heart is not judged by how much you love_

_But by how much you're loved by others_

_It's what they call magic (repeat)_

"Mariah!" Kitty hollered from the side of the room. "You owe me twenty dollars!"

* * *

"It's time for the bride to pass the buck – one wedding leads to another after all. Would all the single women gather on the dance floor? Remember ladies, no fists, elbows, half or full nelsons, kneeing or use of shoes." Jane smiled at the crowed of Elizabeth, Mary, Kitty, and about six others. The small nosegay was air born and in Elizabeth's hands in no time. There were some snide remarks but Elizabeth didn't hear anything as she met Fitzwilliam's eyes. There was nothing but him, unfortunately there were other things and she was soon surrounded by single men vying for the garter that Charles was removing with his teeth in a most risqué fashion. Darcy caught it.

"Now for the couple with the garter and the bouquet to share a dance." Mariah said cueing up the song, but Fitzwilliam stopped her with a wave of his hand.

* * *

"I was going to wait until after the wedding to do this, but fate won't let me be and to be honest it's been to long, so I'm sorry for taking your glory Charlie, but I've got to do this." Darcy said turning to Elizabeth and looking in her eyes. Slowly he sank down to one knee still holding her gaze.

"Elizabeth I love you. I love you more than anything else in the world and I've loved you longer than everything that wasn't included in the first statement. I loved you even when I was that arrogant prig you met back in August who thought you were a hippie. I was fooling myself with all those words, you have taken everything down to my core and given it a shaking – so that only that which was screwed to a sticking point has stayed. But in those old thoughts stead I have you and all that knowing you has given me. I was walking around with a hole in my head and my heart that I had no clue about until you. You've filled those holes past full. No one has made me feel like someone until you, till you I was a rich piece of ass, but you saw me as the man I was, not above reproach but also approachable. You've done both. I was going no where in a hurry, living some dull life and thinking that it was all to be got. But then there was you and I saw a world of color and spirit that I never thought possible. You've filled up my empty life, filled it to the brim. And I can't live with out you. Elizabeth Luciana Keene Bennet will you do me the honor and be my wife?" Elizabeth gasped and tears that had glazed her eyes began to fall. Her lips quivered but through them came a soft, breathy,

"Yes." Darcy pulled out the Tiffany box that had occupied his drawer for far to long to a dull roar. He stood up taking her left hand and slipped the band on it before kissing her passionately.

"In vain have I struggled, it will not do. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you. You have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love... I love... I love you. I love you... most ardently... I never wish to be parted from you from this day on." He whispered against her lips in between kisses. When at last they parted for real they were met by a smiling Jane and Charles and several 'About (insert expletive here) time.' But neither of the pair really comprehended anything other than that feeling that was as old as time.

* * *

_AN: Almost done, thanks for holding on this long! You all are the best, type can't convey my sincarity (only my misspelling sorry). I hope you catch some of the refrences and a factoid; a combination of the three wedding toasts used in this fic got me straight ones at the state speech contest. Thanks again for reading this far!_


	19. Mrs Darcy

Chapter Nineteen; Mrs. Darcy

* * *

"Mrs. Elizabeth Luciana Keene Bennet Darcy. My Mrs. Darcy." The tall stunning groom said as he walked through the front door of their Apartment. "Welcome home." The bride, giddy with joy and tipsy from champagne grabbed her husband's top hat and jumped out of his arms to dance a jig on the coffee table. Laughing her Dr. Darcy picked her up and gave her a little toss.

"Mrs. Darcy" Mrs. Darcy said. "This will take some getting used to."

"But it's a wonderful sound, Mrs. Darcy."

"Don't call me that Mr. Darcy – God we sound so proper." The bride proclaimed.

"Then what should I call you?" Darcy asked.

"At the moment…Lover."

* * *

Darcy woke the next morning to find Elizabeth's fragrant curls sprayed across his chest as she slept on his stomach. Her lying there, tight in his arms he couldn't help but watch her sleep. Those eyes were closed and her mouth was open, she snored softly, she was breath taking; and she was his. All the tears and all the fears, fights and jokes had culminated into everything he dreamed of. Despite his pride, her prejudice, and the life bohemian there was a happy ending. She was his and he was hers.

* * *

La Fin


	20. Where are They Now?

**Epilogue; Where are they now?**

* * *

**Elizabeth and Fitzwilliam Darcy**; Lived happily ever. Two years after their wedding they welcomed a son; Bennett Charles. And two years after him, a daughter Emily Quintessa. Bennett inherited his father's looks, seriousness, and business. He ran the company almost better than his grandfather had. Emily got more of her mother's looks and personality; she became a Brit Lit professor at Smith University, and also wrote several books.

**Jane and Charles Bingley**; Also lived happily ever after. The couple only spent a year permanently at Neatherfield; they then found it way too close to her family. Thus Netherfield Farm became the summer house and Jane and Charles moved back to the City, within a block of Elizabeth and Fitzwilliam. They had two children, Amelia Elizabeth and Roderick William. Amelia became a teacher like her mother and Roderick became an accountant.

**Caroline Bingley**; Married for money a stock broker, they had a decent relationship, not one of real love but both parties respected society too much to stray. They had one son, Steven; he grew up to be very unlike his parents.

**Lady Cat de Bourgh**; She disproved of her nephew's marriage, until she realized that Elizabeth was the famous Luciana Keene, she then spent her life forcing Anne into 'that kind of society'.

**Anne de Bourgh**; Free from the maternal pressure to marry Darcy she was able to marry for love. She met her husband, Peter, through Elizabeth. Both couples became very close. Anne and Peter had twin sons; Colin and Matthew, and neither one were ever told who they were to marry.

**Georgiana Darcy**; Became a piano teacher, as well as the accompanist at the Lady Austin Theater, and a concert pianist. She married a dancer she met at school; Brandon Arlington. They had two boys; Darcy and Spencer, as well as a girl Isabelle.

**Danielle Maddox**; Went to university and got a degree in Women's studies. She then went on to studied law. (Making her father proud of her 'real' education and employment options) However she never took the bar, instead she got on Broadway and fulfilled both her dreams and Elizabeth's prophecy. The Darcys remained close friends and the first child born to Danni and her husband Gregory Ernest (producer) was named Luciana.

**Dick and Louisa Hurst**; Remained close to Charles and Jane as well as Elizabeth and Fitzwilliam. The couple never managed to have children, but was the favorites of all their nephews and nieces.

**Galen Jennings and Jessie**; Remained together and eventually adopted a son, Dominick. They were favorites of the Darcy children as well as the Evans kids.

**Charlotte and William Collins**; William lightened up considerably and the couple even managed to break ties with Lady Cat. They had three children; Zachary, Madeline, and Taylor.

**Matt and Meg Ethans**; Meg had her Daughter shortly after the Lydia fiasco, Christine Marie, named after Christine Deea. She was followed by a son, Algernon Christian, named after Algernon from the Importance of Being Ernest. Algernon married Emily Darcy to the joy of both families – it's not everyday you like your in-laws.

**Frances and Tomas Bennet: **Francy was overjoyed at her daughter's marriages. Anything bad she ever thought about her second child was erased with one look at the bank balance. Eventually, with the allied help of Fitzwilliam and Tomas Elizabeth told her mother about Luciana and her life. The women didn't necessarily get closer, but they did finally come to terms and when Francy did eventually die it was stated that Elizabeth was the one to speak at the funeral. Tomas remained married to his wife, whom he did love and he continued to support all five of his daughters. With the Elizabeth out about Luciana Tomas was able to actually fly out and see a show. As he got older he spent more and more time with Elizabeth and Fitzwilliam, enjoying being able to pop in and bug them when ever.

**Mary Bennett**: She got a doctorate in calculus and married an English professor. They had two sons and a daughter.

**Kitty Bennett**: became therapist and married her high school sweetheart. They had a Daughter, Rosemarie.

**Lydia and George Wickham**; had a son, Ross Benjamin. George wasn't exactly the best father and Lydia was forced to grow up. She did and eventually divorced George, took Ross, and went back to school. She became a paralegal and married her boss. They had a good relationship and a daughter, Sylvia. George ended up with no real change; he remained a shyster until his dying day which was sooner than most due to a mass amount of debut he owed to the wrong people.

As for the company; **Henry **and** Cathy** had a daughter, then a son. **Chris **and** Marianna** had twin girls. **Emma** and **Harriet** finally married men whom they never imagined they would. **Elea **married that dark haired boy from the Squeeze In. **Maggie** married and had five daughters. **Elinor** and **Edward** had a son who married **Anne** and **Fredrick**'s second daughter. **Edmund **and **Fanny** eventually married and had two boys and a girl. The company remained strong as ever and all the members lived happily ever after as well.

* * *

_AN: I can only imagine your fury right now, and I'd be pretty pissed at me too. But I regret to say I have nothing more to do to them. We've spent way too much time together, these characters and I. They are closer to me than my brother, so one; I now have a fear of their intimacy because who wants to think about dear old sis getting it on. And two I'm sort of sick of them. Terrible and shameful I know. But if you guys are desperate for a better ending for them, give me some ideas, part of my problem may be the world's worst case of writers block. _

_Thank you to everyone who is reading this right now, and I worship at the feet of all my reviewers. Your constant support made my days and kept me going. And if you ever gave me the what for I applauded you that was better motivation than anything else. Happily Depressed, you girl are a saint! Can't put a price on how awesome are communications were, now all you have to do to make you a god, Happily, finish that story! There are tons more people I'd like to thank, but I know that if your reading this far down you're board our of your mind, so I'll just say, that you people are so wonderful and way to good to me. THANK YOU!_

_BobbiG;)_


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